Scream's of the Past
by ALaViola
Summary: "Lucy!" the salmon haired male yelled as he ran to catch up her, "Wait!" He grabbed her arm an spun her around, she glared heatedly at him. "What?" she growled, he sighed, "Forgive me Luce! Please, trust me! I'm sorry!""Forgive?" she laughed darkly, "forgiving someone Natsu, is easy," she glared, "But being able to trust them again is a totally different story." NaLu
1. Prologue

**Hello Minna!**

**So this is the new story that my friend ('Hi!') Stroke-of-Midnight87727 came up with**

**And that she is helping me write**

**You guys voted this as the first story u wanted me to post next**

**So hopefully you will not regret you vote and will enjoy this until the end.**

**Next story I am writing; still not for awhile is 'White Tinted Black'**

**Both, luckily for you, are Nalu.**

**Comments from both me and my Friend and co-writer of this novel**

**will be seen at the bottom so check those out.**

**DISCLAIMER: We own nothing! Fairy Tail belongs to Hiro Mashima and the songs used in this story belong to the artists!**

**We only own the plot and cover picture!**

**Let us know what you think **

**and we hope you enjoy.**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**'You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have'**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**°°●Prologue●°°**

**~QOoOQ~**

**"Call me obsessed.  
Call me insane  
Something is creeping through my veins  
My eyes cannot see  
what's underneath.  
I can't stop and you can't stop me."**

Why did things end up this way? Weren't they supposed to be 'best friends forever?' What happened to getting through it together and being there for each other when they needed it or when they just wanted someone to be around?

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

_"Natsu!" a thirteen year old blonde leaped into her best friends arms and gave him a hug, she could hear him chuckled from above her head and looked up to see his usual carefree grin on his face. His salmon hair as messy as ever with his sharp, onyx eyes staring down into her chocolate brown orbs, he tilted his head to the side,_

_"What's up Luce?" she smiled brightly when she heard the nickname he had given her when they first met in pre-school, well other than him mistaking-or so he says- for 'Luigi', she had always hated being around a lot of people she was shy and silent type that liked to just sit around and read a _book _or quietly hum to herself when she was bored but after meeting her bright friend in front of her she slowly started to change. She released him from her grip and smiled up at him,_

_"You guys did a great _job in_the talent show the other day!" she cheered. Natsu laughed at his younger blonde friend, he was about two years older than Lucy but considering he had failed his first year of high school and the chocolate brown eyed girl beside him was extremely smart they were both in the same high school. He remembered how happy she was to get into the same high school as him and how proud her parents were of her getting into high school a year earlier than normal and he too was very proud of her but he would never say it out loud._

_"Really?" he asked, slightly surprised. "We messed up a few times during the bridge, but I guess ice-cube stripping isn't much of a screw up considering he does that every day..." he mumbled, scratching the back of his head as he did so. She giggled at this, they were all used to the raven haired teen's stripping habit by now so it really didn't bother them as much anymore, but it -seemingly- had an effect on quite a few of the high school girls,_

_"Yeah! You guys were great!" her smile only increased as she ranted on and on about how great he and his band mates were; Jellal, Gray, Loke and Midnight -known to them as Macbeth-. Jellal being on keyboard and backup vocals along with Loke who was also on guitar, Gray on base and Midnight on the drums, she remembered when they all first met Gray was originally Natsu's so called 'friend' while Loke was her cousin and Cobra they met after the fifth grade. Her smile slowly dropped as she began to think how talented they were, she was proud of them, that they were so talented that they receive thunderous applause after every performance they did but sometimes being that good had its down sides. Natsu noticed the blondes sudden mood change and peered down into her face worriedly, had he said something that he shouldn't have? All thoughts of that dissipated when he heard her next words, "I'm really going to miss you and the guys..."_

_His eyes widened in understanding, so she was thinking about _that _he sighed and hugged her again in comfort, there wasn't much for him too say, he would be gone for so long and though this was such a great chance for him and the guy's it was also a great loss for each of them; Gray- not being able to help take care of his sick mother, Midnight- Leaving behind his suffering father, Loke- ... well there's not much to lose for him and Natsu; Lucy and Igneel. He was going to miss them both so much but he would never say goodbye, because goodbye for him meant goodbye forever._

**.**

**.**

**.**

**"I'm gonna get this fire started  
Impossible for you to breath  
The temperature's rising up  
Cause I'm burning up."**

All things that were said back then are now long forgotten for it was time that had killed them, with time they would grow and speak to others about anything they chose, they would pass the nights and days doing things they had always dreamed of doing or something they just simply do for entertainment. Without time, they would have never broken apart.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

_"Hey," he called gently and pinched her cheeks, forcing her to look him in the eye, "How about you come and sing with us some time?" she cheered up immediately at the thought of being able to sing alongside her best friend. He laughed at her easy-to-please self and grabbed her by the wrist to bring her back home to her parents considering they had just finished packing and they had a long morning ahead of them, a very long, emotional one at that. Lucy waved goodbye to the rest of the guy's including some of her best girl friend's; Erza, Levy and Cana, who all except Levy were older then her, she allowed Natsu to pull her along as they made their way to her house. "Don't worry Luce! No matter how far away I am I will always be there for you! Just text me and call me and I'll answer as best I can, I promise!" he stated and then looked her in the eyes, "And if I break this promise then you have my permission to punch me, 'kay?" she nodded meekly and he smiled._

_The salmon haired teen quietly let go of her wrist, much to their dismay, and shoved his hands in his pockets before asking quietly, "How's your mother doing?"_

_"...Fine," she went quiet after her one worded answer and he could tell she wanted to stop all remainders of the conversation. He sighed quietly since he and Lucy were neighbors their families were quite close and he had started to see Layla as a motherly figure ever since his mother had passed on, lately he had been informed of the elder blondes health situation and how Jude's work has been going smoothly which also meant he was away from home often leaving Lucy with only her ill mother. He nodded silently and pat her head,_

_"Don't worry; I know she'll get better." That was a lie... he didn't know when or _if_ her mother would get better but he wanted to do anything he could to get rid of the sad face his best friend was pulling, he knew what it felt like to lose his mother and although he didn't remember very much about her, he still remembered her loving him very much just as Lucy felt toward Layla and it wasn't even about that; he just simply wanted to believe what he told her for both himself and her. She looked up at him with hopeful eyes reflecting off the moonlight and he couldn't help but find the way she looked at that moment; cute. He really was going to miss her and it made him think twice about leaving but he knew that even though she'd be sad, Lucy would never let him stay back just for her and ruin the dream's he and the guy's had for the future. "Hey, remember that time we went to the beach with the guys and Erza?" He asked trying to get a laugh from the blonde, and was not let down when he heard her quiet giggles,_

_"You mean when those college guys were bothering Erza and I and you guys came to help but found them in the floor with Erza's fist up high?" He chuckled and folded his hands behind his head, looking up at the dark sky as he nodded slightly,_

_"Jeez, when you told me what happened I thought I was going to die from laughter," apparently from Lucy's explanation, Erza had listened to what the guy's had to say but when one pointed out how the blondes bikini top looked on her-or more specifically her generous chest for a thirteen year old- their favorite scarlet haired friend had accused him of being an ultimate pervert, looking at a younger girls chest and then socked him one. Lucy's giggles turned into full out laughter, apparently thinking the same thing as he had been and he watched her smile turn into a bittersweet one. "Hey, remember when we were younger and you said you wanted to try some wine so I stole your mothers wine and drank some," he chuckled. _

_"Oh Mavis..." she mumbled, covering her now red face with her hands as she shook her head, "That was terrible; not only did the wine burn my throat but my mom found out and I got grounded for a month!"_

_"You think that was bad!?" he scoffed. "My old man got so mad at me that he literally turned bright red and started chasing me around the house with a spatula! I thought he was going to breath fire or somethin'! Scared the shit outta' me!" she giggled at his exaggerated explanation. "Man we were pretty dumb, like that time we stole your dad's care and I drove us around the block a few times." he smirked. "I'm pretty damn good if I do say so myself." she snorted,_

_"If I remember correctly it was_ you _who stole my dad's car and forced me into the passenger seat. As for your driving..." she trailed off, playing with the ends of her hair. Natsu rose a brow, remembering her habit of playing with her hair when she was lying or hiding something,_

_"What?" she glanced at him for a moment before sighing and releasing her hair from her grip and told him bluntly,_

_"You suck at driving, Natsu. You almost destroyed dad's car! Not only that but that was only three months ago!" he laughed,_

_"Details, details~" she smiled and looked down at the ground, silence taking over them once again._

_"Thanks Natsu..."_

_"For what?" she looked up at him, a small smile playing on her lips. They were nearing her house now and she needed to get this off her chest before tomorrow came around, tears spun to her eyes at the thought of having to say goodbye the next morning but she knew that this was Natsu's dream and she couldn't come between him and his dream just for her own selfish reasons. Should she really tell him though? If he accepted would he even go? She didn't want any of that but she also didn't want to keep this to herself anymore. She let out a shaky breath full of nerves,_

_"For always being there for me..." he walked her up to her doorstep and watched her stand in the doorway to her home with the door wide open, tear's slowly falling down her face one by one. The shock of it was nothing compared to the next words she said, "... I didn't want to tell you Natsu because I was afraid-" he wiped the tears off her face before stepping out of the doorway and listened to her. "-I was afraid of what you would say, afraid of what others would say, if you would judge me, and if it would change your mind about tomorrow," she spoke carefully, choosing each word with great care. "But I can't hold it in anymore Natsu..." She sucked in a sharp breath and got her hand ready on the doorknob as she stared into his onyx eyes that always had her held captive, "I-I like you, Natsu..." and with that she slammed the door, leaving the salmon haired teen dumbfounded. He stood there on her porch for a few minutes and looked down at the silver ring threaded with thick, black thread around his neck, laying over top of his scarf. He wrapped his hand around the silver ring and stared up at the door in silence and he realized she wasn't lying about it; she didn't touch her hair._

**.**

**.**

**.**

**"Pyromania  
Pyromania ow  
Pyromania  
ah ah ah ow  
Pyromania  
Pyromania ow  
ow ow owww  
X2**

**.**

**Pyro Pyromania ma ma mania  
Pyro Pyromania ma ma mania"**

**.**

**"I must confess  
A thousand degrees  
Bring out the beast inside of me  
Don't be afraid  
Go into the place  
It's gonna melt your fears away"**

Things don't always turn out the way we thought they would, they never imagined that they could be separated from each other, they thought that they were each other's strength and weakness, and that was true-or so it seemed. The truth can be turned into lies with time and lies can be turned into truths; only the lies take a lot longer.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

_The blonde looked at her salmon haired best friend as he walked away from her house with a complicated look on his face. She let out a shallow breath and held her hand against her heart, trying to calm herself down because if she didn't, it wouldn't be good for anyone. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she thought of what she just did, she probably just ruined the best friendship she would ever have in her life and the thought of that pained her but she did what she did for a reason and she felt the weight lifting off her shoulders. _

_Slowly she got off her bed and took out a rather large blue book with a picture of her and Natsu on the front. She giggled through the tears and opened the photo album to see pictures of when they would have sleepovers in their younger grades or when they would play basketball with their friends or sing in Gray's garage. She giggled when she saw a picture of when Natsu decided that it would be a good idea to set his hair on fire and then jump into her pool afterwards, she remembered that Igneel had just pulled into the driveway to see his son running around, hair aflame, and toward her pool. Igneel had been so mad that he had shaved one straight line down the middle of Natsu's hair; he was not happy. _

_"Lucile?" Her head snapped up at the sound of her mother's concerned voice and she hurriedly wiped away the tears left on her face and closed the book, "Did you have a fight with Nat- *COUGH COUGH*?" her mother fell to her knees and Lucy ran and helped her mother onto her bed so she could rest, "Thank you..."_

_"Mama, you shouldn't be up and around like this... remember what the doctor said? Rest will help you heal..." the elder blonde looked at her daughter with loving eyes that held a sad hint to them, she knew that she wouldn't always be here for her beautiful daughter, and though it was never spoken out loud, she knew she was getting sicker and sicker and nothing could stop this. She watched her daughter avoid her gaze and mumble, "It's nothing," she sighed, "I-I'm just really going to miss Natsu and miss being around him..." she leaned her head against her mother's chest. Layla smiled and smoothed out the blonde hair that looked just like hers and said,_

_"Best friends-like Natsu is like the stars," she smiled pointing to the beautifully shinning stars out her window, "you don't always see him," she grabbed the photo album of her and the salmon haired idiot and smiled, "but you know he's always there. So whenever you miss him or feel lonely; look at the stars and think of him..." and with that she got off her daughters bed and kissed her forehead before wobbly making her way out of her daughters room. Lucy looked up at the stars lighting up the sky alongside the moon in the darkness and leaned her head over her arms that rest on the windowsill. She gazed at the stars with a sad look in her eyes and thought about the long road ahead; sad thing was, she already missed him._

**.**

**.**

**.**

**"I'm gonna get this fire started  
Impossible for you to breath  
The temperature's rising up  
Cause I'm burning up."**

**"Pyromania  
Pyromania ow  
Pyromania  
ah ah ah ow  
Pyromania  
Pyromania ow  
ow ow owww  
X2**

**.**

**Pyro Pyromania ma ma mania  
Pyro Pyromania ma ma mania"**

People like her-they could never totally be free, they couldn't live for their future all they could really do was scream for their past.  
They can never stay still even for a moment, always having to move forward in life because-

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

_Lucy sniffled as she watched Gray, Loke, Jellal, Midnight and... Natsu, pack all their things and place it on the tour bus that would soon be traveling with them. Natsu hadn't spoken a word to her all morning and she felt like she was on pins and needles waiting for some words to be spoken, she didn't care if it was just him saying a simple goodbye without saying anything about her confession; she just wanted him to say something for her to hang onto. She watched Igneel with a small smile as he discreetly wiped a tear as he watched his sixteen year old son bring his bags onto the place he would be traveling in for the next long while. Finally the salmon haired teen came up to the smaller blonde awkwardly and asked to speak with her in private-wishing Layla well in her health condition- evidently pulling her away from her parents who were wishing the boys well._

_Layla watched her daughter's small smile with one of her own, she wanted her to keep having that smile on her face but she knew that it would soon turning into a horribly blank look after her time came, looking up to her husband she spoke quietly from her wheelchair,_

_"Jude, when I'm gone-"_

_"Layla don't even speak like that... You will be fine." his words sounded harsh but she was able to pinpoint the gentleness within his tone and she frowned slightly,_

_"Jude, we both know that I won't last forever..." she let out a few coughs as if she was proving her point, " Please just promise me one thing..?" she asked and squeezed his limp hand, smiling at him with the smile that he had fallen in love with all those years ago, "Make sure Lucy keeps that smile," He smiled down at her and kissed the crown of her head, tears surely making its way down his face as he said shakily,_

_"I promise..."_

_Natsu lead his favorite blonde to the park they would always play at when they were younger, both seated on a swing enjoying the sunny day they were having. Silence descended upon them as Natsu began to collect his thoughts on how he should say the things he wanted to, _

_"Lucy, about yesterday-"_

_"I'm sorry!" He stared at her in shock as she bowed her head to him in apology and he ran a shaky hand through his unruly hair as he tugged on the fabric of his leather jacket,_

_"W-What?" his voice was scratchy as he let his gaze stay on the bowing blonde who refused to move an inch, silence, again, that's all that seemed to be with them, nothing but the blank sound of silence. He heard her mumble something, "What?" he asked again and he could hear the sharp intake of breath as she gripped the swings so tightly that her knuckles turned white,_

_"I didn't mean to say it..." His eyes widened at her revelation, so what she said was just something to get him to stay? He shook his head, no that couldn't be, Lucy, _his _Lucy would never do something like that but then, again why would she say the things she said last night? His brain was jumbled as he continued to replay her words over and over again in his head before he looked down, face stiff with agony evident in his eyes as he grit his teeth and clenched his fist's._

_"Okay, then were done here." his words, they were like knives in her skin and she couldn't help but look up at him when she heard him turn around so he could walk back to the bus. He shook his head, he was so stupid to think that her words last night were true, he thought, really this was Lucy he was thinking about he sighed and tried to keep the tears at bay as he walked the way back toward his friends when he felt a small tug on his sleeve. Looking behind him he saw his best friend with a tear streaked face clutching onto his sleeve,_

_"I didn't mean to say that..." she repeated. Only driving the knives further in for both of them, "I meant to say I love you..." she looked up and into his onyx eyes and smiled through her tears, allowing more tears to spill down her face, Natsu stood their frozen and useless in front of the crying girl before him. She-She loved him? He never thought he would hear those words from her and yet she was standing there in front of him crying her heart out and saying she loves him, slowly he turned to her and grabbed her hand,_

_"D-Do you mean that?" he watched her nod vigorously and immediately tugged on her arm effectively smashing her into his toned chest. He finally allowed the tears to spill from his eyes as he buried his face in her hair, keeping her head in place. He buried his face in her hair and hugged her closer as he ran his fingers through her golden locks, "Wait for me..." He said pulling back from her and looking into her chocolate brown eyes, surprising her,_

_"W-What?" Her voice was horse, most likely from all the crying she had done. Natsu smiled down at her and held her hand in his, just knowing that she was here in front of him made all his worries dissipate,_

_"I said wait for me..." he repeated. He let go of her hand and grabbed the ring around his neck before placing it around her own, Lucy looked down at the silver band on the black string and looked back up at him with wide eyes._

_"Natsu..? This-"_

_"I want you to keep it... so wait for me." he interrupted her. She looked back down at the ring and slipped her slender finger through it, in return it hung loosely off her finger. Lucy knew that this ring was special to him for the reason that his mother had given it to him the day she died, on his birthday. He grabbed her hands, desperately clutching onto them hearing his band mates calling his name, "please, Luce. I have to keep moving, promise me..." she saw the desperation in his eyes and desperately fought back the tears as he slowly let their fingers detach, she smiled a small, broken smile and looked him in the eye._

_"I will..." she whispered. Her hair filtering through the air as the morning breeze blew by, "... I promise." _

**.**

**.**

**.**

**"Soon as the fire is running wild  
I will surrender Fahrenheit  
And I don't want to apologize  
Its getting hot and I'm burning up."**

**"Pyromania  
Pyromania ow  
Pyromania  
ah ah ah ow  
Pyromania  
Pyromania ow  
ow ow owww  
X2**

**.**

**Pyro Pyromania ma ma mania  
Pyro Pyromania ma ma mania"**

**.**

-Those who do not move, do not notice their chains binding them and preventing them from moving forward, and making them scream for living in the past.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**'Trust is like paper; once it's crumpled it can never be perfect again'**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Hey guys! Hopefully you enjoyed this story's prologue and would like to read more. The cover for this story or picture I guess you could say was made by me, we want to have something original so let me know what you guys think of it! As an explanation of what was going on in the story, basically the bold letters as you could see were part of a song but nobody in the prologue is actually singing it but you will understand after the next chapter and obviously the italicized words are about the past with Lucy and Natsu. The song in the prologue is called **_**'Pyromania' **_**by Cascada-whom my friend had found for this so give her credit! Also as you can see I have changed my username from my previous user; '**_**Stardust712**_**', once again hopefully you guys won't be confused about that!  
Sorry!  
Leave a review and let us know what you thought~**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: Hello fellow Otakus, this is my story idea which I have asked **_**Shattered-Nightmares712**_**to type in my place because I suck at typing and writing and I am extremely lazy. I am previously known as **_**Horse-from-Hell87727**_**, if you guys remember. Mentioning me in a couple of her A/N's in the beginning and end of a chapter in her stories. Hopefully you guys enjoyed and don't forget to review! **

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	2. Chapter 1: His Life Now

**So,**

**hopefully you guys enjoyed the prologue because here is **

**Chapter 1.**

**Like I said in the comments before,**

**you will understand the reasoning for the song in this chapter **

**and the normal lettering below it**

**in the next chapter.**

**For now thought,**

**just think of that and I want to say something again.**

**So when me and my co-writer/bff**

**were speaking about this chapter on Skype I was saying quotes for the beginning**

**and end of the story while making fun of one and**

**so my voice cut out.**

**Well she's like "**_**What?! You want Natsu to say, 'Will you be the sand in my pants'!?"**_

**I died hearing that and so we've been saying that all day on the bus**

**and our friends are like**

**O.o**

**Mutual weirdness, that's why we get along.**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Time is our greatest Enemy**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 1: His Life Now**

**~QOoOQ~**

He stood there panting, his chest heaving up and down along with friends as they all smiled and laughed at the thunderous applause, the lights blinding them from seeing the faces of their supporters; this was how it always was and by now they were used to it but they could never get used to the exhilarating feeling of standing up in front of them and doing what they love. He placed the microphone on its stand as he turned back to his friends and gave them a grin to which they easily returned, it had been so long since they left and started their lessons and their tour and while it may have been really fun they knew that it was coming to an end. Raising his hand in the air, the crowd went silent and he began to speak, sweat dripping down the side of his face. His voice was scratchy from the singing he had done as he gazed out at the crowed, his band mates walking up beside him.

He laughed when he heard the roaring cheers after he spoke, he loved the thrill of being onstage and doing what he loved; to sing. He watched the smiling faces in the front rows of the audience, they are what made their dream's possible and he wanted to thank them all before they had to leave and so with a wave of his hand all the members of their band began to throw some T-shirts as thanks into the audience. The screams grew louder in response to their actions and he smiled over at his friends; watching them throw out the shirts to whoever could catch them and he laughed as. he watched the raven haired male strip off his own shirt and throw it to a group of girls.

He released a breath and threw the last T-shirt out into the audience and took a bow with his band mates, he couldn't believe how many fans they had got over the years; he couldn't wait to go home and tell his old man himself about their success. With one last glance they left the spotlight and walked up to their blonde haired manager; who did not look very pleased.

"WHAT WERE YOU IDIOTS THINKING!?" He roared before putting his fingers on his temples and sighing. "You guys are such a pain in the ass," he mumbled and shook his head.

"Oh come on Laxus, you know you love us~" the man in return just glared at the ginger who had slung his arm around his rather large shoulders. He grunted and stepped away from them as he jerked his thumb over his shoulder,

"Anyway, you guys have some fans waiting for you here so hurry up," they all nodded and began to walk in the direction he pointed at to, to see a large group of girls waiting with pen's and paper. Silently the ran haired male released a sigh and walked behind his bubbly best friend ad band mates, slowly, he walked up to the girl before his eye came into contact with one of them, he froze in slight fear and shock, he knew this girl...

"Oh shit..." he mumbled. The guys glanced at him before they turned their gaze on the person he was staring at with wide eyes, Natsu allowed a smirk to crawl up his face when he saw the blue haired, die-hard fan girl and they chuckled at this as he and Jellal went behind him and grabbed his arms, "Oi! Flame-shit! What're you doin'!?" The two boys just grinned in response to his cry and flung him toward the blue haired woman who, in return, squealed,

"GRAY-SAMA!"

The guy's howled in laughter as they saw their raven haired band mate struggle to free himself of the die-hard fan-girls death grip, Midnight and Jellal simply shook their heads and walked over toward the group of girls, greeting them with large smiles. Loke walked over to them boldly with a broad smile across his face, his glasses glinting under the lights as he pulled them down and winked at one of the girls in the front,

"Hello Ladies~" his smooth voice caused great reactions of pleasure from the girls as the majority began to fan themselves, he smirked over at his friends and grabbed one lucky girls hand, placing a chaste kiss on her hand.

"PRINCE LOKE!" He chuckled lowly and smiled dazzlingly at them before finishing off with a wink, "KYAAAAAA~!" Natsu glanced over at the playboy ginger and shook his head slightly, he was glad he wasn't like that, he was happy just having one special person in his life, which he remembered he would need to contact when he could, though it had been awhile. He plastered a toothy grin on his face and looked over to the girls on the left side, they all smiled, he wondered why he always got the quiet fans, nevertheless he was grateful for having any at all and approached them with a smile. "Natsu-sama~" they cheered, he released a silent breath,

"Hello ladies..." he reached his hand out to shake each of theirs, "Would you like me to sign anything?" they nodded their heads, silently cheering inside as they each handed him books , pictures and pens at the same time, he smiled wryly and signed each of their offered papers as they waited patiently for him to finish. As he signed the numerous papers he couldn't help but think of their tour, it's been so long since he's been home and he couldn't help but feel excited at the thought of seeing everyone. He hadn't seen his father in so long and though he was excited to see him, he was also still a little upset about what had happened but that didn't stop the feelings from pooling in his stomach.

"Natsu-sama?" one of the girls piped up; coco colored eyes and blonde hair. She looked beautiful like any normal guy would have concluded by just glancing at her but that wasn't what he was focused on;

Blonde hair.

He smiled slightly, her hair brining back old memories that he had cherished, she was the one person he wanted to see most after being separated for so long, occasionally keeping in touch but, as he remembered earlier, not as of lately had he spoken to her. "Natsu-sama?" they called again, sapping out of his thoughts he shook his head and assured them that nothing was wrong and continued to sign.

"I was just thinking of something.." he explained vaguely. The girls looked at each other with raised brow before the same girl as before spoke up,

"Natsu-sama? Is it about the tour?" his movements halted at her observation before he smiled fondly,

"Yeah," he paused. "Yeah I was thinking of someone from back home, someone I haven't seen for quite some time," he told them. The girl, he learned was 'Marisa', smiled a soft smile at him.

"Who is it?" snapping back to his usual 'celeb' façade, he grinned and put a finger to his lips.

"It's a secret..." The girls whined slightly at his words but didn't attempt to push the subject further, he chuckled at the disappointed voices and smiled slightly, his eyes narrowed.

"He really hasn't forgotten, has he?" the bluenette glanced over at his raven haired band mate, who stayed silent and watched the salmon haired male smile and laugh with his fan's. "Do you think she will-"

"No." He shook his head, interrupting Jellal's question, "No, there's already something going on with her..." he spoke quietly, with hesitation evident in his voice, "She's not who we used to know..." he mumbled. He shook his head slightly and heaved a sigh, just thinking about it gave him headaches, he, as well as three of the four other band members have received information from the bluenette's girlfriend about their favorite friend from back home, though only minor and short details, they knew something was different. Jellal stayed silent for a moment before speaking quietly,

"What..." his breath hitched, "what do you think happened to her?" Gray turned his head to the side with narrowed eyes, he looked over at Loke, not even he knew everything that was going on with the girl, he was worried, they all were but they still couldn't do anything about it. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, he couldn't wait to get, to see how his mother was after everything that happened, to see his best friend and see how everything was going for her in Magnolia. Would she even tell them if they came back? He glanced over at the salmon haired male to the left side of him and Jellal and shook his head silently, he wouldn't know anything, the idiot being who he was barely spoke to the girl and normally it was through one of them.

"I don't know man but-" he pursed his lips and glanced at the bluenette, "-whatever it is, made her different..." slowly, Jellal nodded in agreement, he didn't want to accept it but reality was a bitch and he knew no matter how much anyone denied it, the truth would always stick no matter the person's wishes. Both boys glanced over to the side when they noticed a patch of blonde moving toward the group of girls surrounding their band mates,

"All right ladies, times up." he ignored the whines of disapproval and scanned his eyes across the faces of the members of _'Catching Fire'_, "Boy's, conference room. Now."

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

The boys sat around the table in the conference room as they watched their blonde haired manager pace back in forth at the front of the room, his brow's were scrunched up and a vein was bulging form the side of his neck and they knew that they were in deep. Laxus' eye's narrowed at the silence and he was slightly thankful for it, he couldn't believe how idiotic these boys were, throwing those shirts out into the audience, where the hell did they even get that many!? He groaned thinking of the price of those shirts and finally, he turned his body to face them in once swift movement as he slammed his hands down on the table causing them to jump. He glared,

"You-" he heaved a sighed. "You boys are idiots!" he raised his voice as his glare became more heated, each boy turning their heads to the side to look at the other, wondering what they had done this time to upset the fearsome mutant 'Spark'. "We did not set up anything like that stunt you pulled!" his chest heaved up and down as he could not contain his anger. Natsu put his hands behind his head and leaned back, not worrying about a word the blonde male was saying,

"Chill _'Spark' _we only handed out a thousand or so..." he mumbled as he scratched his head. Laxus' eyes bulged at his statement and his jaw clenched tightly when he noticed the relaxed expressions on the boys faces,

"WHAT!?" He roared, he looked over at the ginger to see his terrified expression, one finger in his ear stopping its actions when the sound reached his other ear, "DO YOU GUYS KNOW HOW MUCH THOSE COST A PIECE!?" the boys all shook their heads, ignorant of the price of each of the shirts they handed out cost. "TWENTY FIVE FUCKIN' BUCKS GUYS! PER SHIRT AND YOU HANDED HOW MANY OUT!?" They avoided his heated gaze, not wanting to process the amount of money that would be needed to cover the cost. The blonde let out a loud, defeated groan, he couldn't handle this anymore, letting out a sigh as he realized why his grandfather had been so kind to give him this group of hooligans. His eyes snapped open when he remembered the damn name the idiotic salmon haired idiot had called him, "DONT FUCKING CALL ME SPARK!"

"Jeez, Chill Spar-"

_***Glare***_

_"_-Laxus. We can pay for it."

"Natsu, have you even figure out what the cost is?" he crossed his arms across his chest, waiting for the younger males answer as he tapped his foot impatiently.

"Um... No?" he sighed and shook his head, thinking of what he was going to do about them and how he was going to pay for everything. He put his fingers to his temples and rubbed slightly to sooth the aching in his head as much as possible,

"You know what..." he mumbled lifting his head up-which he had at some point lowered- and stared at them. "I've decided, you're all going back to school once we reach Magnolia." The boys leaped out of their seats, mouths dropped as they gaped at the smug manager,

_"WHY!?"_

Laxus grinned, "Because you're dumb as shit," he watched as Natsu pulled on his salmon locks before he stared straight into the eyes of the blonde haired male,

"I am _not_ dumb!"

"Oh really?"

_***Nod***_

"Prove it," he challenged, "What's 9X9?" Natsu crossed his arms across his chest, mimicking his own posture and turned his nose up and to the side, a smug air surround him as he replied, eyes closed,

"36." Laxus gaped at the salmon haired idiot and allowed his band mates to slap him on the back of the head, "OW! Hey what the fuck was that for!?"

"Natsu, you're an idiot!" the blonde yelled. "That's not even close! The answer is 81!" again the vein in his neck appeared as he hit his head with the clipboard he had been looking at, "That's my final decision, you are all going to school as soon as you get back!" he grumbled, Loke slowly rose his head, hesitant to anger the mutant. "What is it flirt?" Pushing his glasses further up his nose,

"I just simply pleasure woman with my charming looks and what about our concerts and autograph signings, wont that be hard if we go to school? It just means more work for you..." the rest of the band silently cheered at Loke for his wits, knowing full well how Laxus hated more work then what he had to do already but they're silent cheering went dead when they saw the large smirk forming on the blonde's now smug face.

"I'll figure something out.." he chuckled, "don't you worry your pretty little head.." his voice just dripped with confidence and it was then the boys knew they had no chance at escaping the situation to which they-not so gracefully- flopped down on their chairs once again. "My gramps owns a school which you guys probably heard about considering he is your boss, you will attend that high school like any normal person but," he waved a finger, "you will all be in your last year with a one year advantage from the rest."

"So we're going to Fairy Tail?" the-up until now- silent Jellal voiced his conclusion to which he received a firm nod from their manager, "I don't really mind considering I am a year older than the others..." the twenty year old mumbled.

"Jellal you don't have to if you don't want-Your not the brainless shit head here-, you can just volunteer or somethin', anything to keep an eye on the rest of these idiots." he jabbed his finger at the remaining four band members who were all but happy with the situation. "Anyways-" he clapped his hands together to grab their attention, "You guys have a photo shoot bright and early tomorrow so you all better get some sleep," he told them glancing at the clipboard a she did so. "We wouldn't want you looking like shit before you go to school now would we?" he grinned mischievously walking out the room, closing the door behind him, efficiently dodging the drumstick that was being thrown at his back.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

"Jeez, Sparky didn't have to be that harsh..."

"Yeah, I'm not as dumb as he thinks!"

"Natsu you idiot! You couldn't even give the correct answer to 9X9, that's really sad for a 19 year old..."

"You wanna' go stripper!?"

"Bring it on you retarded Flame-shit!"

The guys all sat in their resting house for when they had the rare pleasure of relaxing, Natsu being on the couch paper in hand, Gray on one of the chair's in front of the mirror's with a guitar on his lap, Midnight drumming his fingers on the coffee table as he sat himself on the floor, Jellal listening to music as he played with different key's on his keyboard and Loke sitting on the couch; phone in hand. The raven haired teen glanced over at the ginger and smiled slightly having an idea of who Loke was about to contact, the ginger in question just continued to scroll through the list of contacts on his phone. His glasses glinted as his list continued into names starting with 'L',

_'Laura_

_Laney_

_Leila_

_Lena_

_Leon'_

His face contorted into a disgusted look as he read the name; quickly deleting the number from his contacts remembering the day he met the male and somehow ended up exchanging numbers over a drunken conversation with him. He sighed and pushed his glasses further up his nose; continuing his search for that certain contact.

_'Lindsey_

_Linda_

_Lila_

_Lisa_

_Lin_

_Lillian_

_Lily_

_Liz_

_Lora _

_Lori _

_Lucille_

_Lucy. A_

_Lucy. D_

_Lucy.G _

_Lucy. K-'_

He furrowed his brow at the lack of the girls name and then remembered that he had re-named that particular contacting he was searching for and scrolled further down until the contacts were under the letter 'P'.

_'Pandora_

_Patricia_

_Patsy_

_Petra_

_Penelope_

_Petunia_

_Princess-'_

He smiled when saw the number he was looking for and immediately started to start typing a message to her, again Gray smirked over at hm and shook his head, he couldn't wait to see her too, being how long it had been and of course he had kept some contact with her but they hadn't really talked about much, or rather, she hadn't. His fingers grazed over the strings as he continued his thoughts only glancing at the string every so often until a small chiming noise was heard in the room;

"Oi! Leo! Ya' texting Lucy!?" The raven haired male's head snapped up to the drum player once he heard those words, hastily he grabbed the thing nearest to him-which happened to be his phone- and chucked it at the tanned man's head. "WHAT THE HELL!?" he just glared in response, knowing Midnight-or Macbeth as they called him- would be smart enough to figure it out; to which he did and his eyes widened. "Oh shit..." salmon hair bobbed as he mumbled those words and a bright look appeared on his face,

"Wait! Tell Luce I said hi!" Loke looked at him with a blank face before nodding slightly and checking the message he received on his phone; not forgetting to send glare at Macbeth-Midnight- in the process.

_From: Princess__  
_12:50 PM-_  
_Hey Loke! What's up?__

His lips quirked up slightly when he saw her message and hesitantly started to reply, he was glad that they could talk even though he was so busy all the time as was she with whatever she had been busy with as of late.

_To: Princess__  
_12: 52 Pm_  
_-Hello Princess! Nm, we just finished a concert a little while ago. How are things going at school?_  
_-Gray, Macbeth and Jellal say Hi too!__

He sighed and closed his phone; glancing at Gray as he did and he nodded to him before closing his eyes and listening to the gentle strumming the blue eyed male was doing and the merciless taps Erik was doing on the table. He felt his phone vibrate once again after awhile of waiting and sighed when he saw her response;

_From: Princess__  
_1:10AM_  
_-... Things are the same as always here._  
_-Look Lo, I've got to go, it's getting late and I'm sure you guys need rest. Tell them I said goodnight.__

He sighed and shook his head lightly, he could tell her later about what's going on, maybe then she would actually speak to him instead of avoiding him and telling him everything is 'fine' when he knows it's not.

"What did she say?" Loke stood up and turned his back to them while quietly answering his question; walking out the and onto the balcony as he did.

"She said goodnight..."

He sighed and closed the door behind him; loving the cool breeze they were receiving that night, again he released a small, audible breath, why wouldn't she talk to him anymore? Ever since that day she has been slowly separating herself from them and he could tell what she was doing; she told him what was happening but after that she had been almost, completely detached from them. He looked up to the star-filled sky and just stood there staring at the stars; silently thinking,

_'Don't worry Princess, were coming home soon. There will be no reason for you to keep those silent screams.'_

Natsu glanced at the space where his flirtatious friend had left; was there something eh was missing? He seemed to blank out every time he mentioned Lucy. Something kept ebbing at him, why he received nothing detailed in the replies Loke had given him to quote what his blonde best friend had said to him, maybe she was just in some mood. Then again, she wouldn't be like this for so long so what other reason was there for her to be so cold, he shook his head, maybe he was just worrying to much? He laughed at himself, he reminded himself of an old man waiting for prunes to go on sale.

"Oi! Flame-brain, what's with the rape face 'ya got on 'ya?!"

"What fucking rape face!? If anything that is you considering your a damn exhibitionist!" He glared at the raven haired male for interrupting his thoughts,

"Why you-!?"

"Would both of you damn fool's just shut the fuck up!? Tattoo's and I are tryin' to concentrate!"

Looking down at his sheet music he began to write the words that popped into mind at the thought of her; remembering all those crazy times that they had together. He sighed-leaning back into the couch and looking up at the roof, hands clasped behind his head-, he really missed her and if it weren't for him being so far away from home he would be spending every minute with her but now, he smiled, he was coming home.

* * *

**Chapter 2**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Alive or just breathing?**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered_Nigtmares712: Well hello again guys, that was a quick update-which I know is not my best and I assure you, the next one will be much better- but we did that since you guys didn't really get to see much in the prologue, so hopefully this was good enough. I'm hoping that I will be able to make each chapter at least 4,000 words so it will be nice and long for you guys, so Stroke-of-Midnight87727 and I have decided to make this story a long one maybe up until 30 chapters but we will have to see how long it actually is in the end but were pretty sure it will reach 30 or more! This story may take longer to update than most of my other stories since this will be very detailed and the fact that my co-writer is very lazy and does not like to help with detail ;P.**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: Hey! I do help! I just don't feel like it sometimes but anyway's I hope you guy's enjoyed the first chapter of this story, remember the next chapter you will see what the second lettering was about (not the bold or **_italic_**) in the Prologue. Finally March break has come to us! We are going to be off for the next little while so Shattered_Nightmares712 may be able to update more chapters then usual. What did you guys think about the whole Natsu and Loke thing? Can you guess why Loke didn't tell **_**'Princess' **_**about Natsu's greeting?****  
**Within due time you will see~****

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	3. Chapter 2: Her Life Now

**Hello ****again****!**

**We're back with another chapter of 'Scream's of the Past' for you!**

**So this chapter will explain what the normal lettering in the Prologue was about.**

**Because obviously the **_**Italic **_**was the past**

**and the Bold was for The band **

**now we see what the **normal** lettering was!**

**So, what do you guys think so far of the story hm?**

**Is it good?**

**I think this one is pretty different from all of my other stories,**

**so we will see how that goes but**

**for now enjoy Chapter 2 of**

**Scream's of the Past**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Reality is a Prison**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 2: Her Life Now**

**~QOoOQ~**

A small sigh escaped a pair of pink lips as the blonde leaned back in her chair barely listening to the lesson the teacher was providing-unlike others- she wasn't as dumb as shit so she didn't need to listen. She allowed a side-long glance at her best friend-who was at the moment, doing the same thing she was- and smirked slightly, suddenly having a -in her mind- brilliant idea and wrote something on a scrap piece of paper before rolling it into a ball of paper and throwing it at him. She watched as the small ball hit him in the side of the head and held back a chuckled when he turned his pissed gaze to her an raised the middle finger at her, she only smirked more and raised her hands up in reason-taking caution not grab the attention of their teacher- she eyed his movements and watched as he opened the piece of paper before returning her smirk and nodding.

As quietly as he could, he tore small fragments of paper from his notebook and rolled them into small balls before pulling out two thin, circular tubes and handed her one of them, he grinned at her before turning to start their plan. Smirking inwardly at her gift for coming up with ways to get them out of the classroom, she especially hated the one she was in currently which just so happened to be geography. Silently, she put one of the pieces of paper in the straw and looked over at her friend before nodding, signaling she was ready and then, simultaneously, they rose the straws to their mouths and blew into it, their target; Mr. Everlue.

"Now class turn you textboo-kahh!" two small spitballs landed in his mouth immediately causing an uproar of laughter to ring out around the room, the spitball culprits being the loudest of the bunch. The blonde could just imagine the steam coming out his ears and from the looks of his tomato red face, her thoughts may or may not come true as he stalked toward her and her partner-in-'crime'. "Mr. Redfox," he stated only sparing a glance toward the black haired male who, in return just let out his signature 'Gihi,' "Ms. Heartfil-" her brown orbs darkened at the sound of her last name being spoken,

"Don't you say it." she held her finger up as if emphasizing her words. Mr. Everlue sighed in return to her harsh words, he simply gave her a bored expression before speaking,

"Miss. Lucy, I do not see the benefit in hitting me with those spit balls of yours. A ugly woman such as yourself should be focusing on your beauty instead of your pranks, though I see you have already-" he pinched the bridge of his nose and turned it away as if he could smell something foul in the air before raising his flat hand out to her, "-attempted to bring out some of your inner beauty. Miss. Lucy, my advice, use a different style; one that is also appropriate for school." raising a brow at his words she simply stuck up the middle finger as he turned to her pierced friend. Gajeel gave him a sideways glance and smirked,

"Gihi! How'd it taste teach?"

"Gajeel," he shook his head sadly, "I don't understand why such a handsome man such as yourself would ever participate in such childish pranks with this foul misfit." he said glancing back at the angered blonde. He shrugged, slightly flattered by his compliment,

"Don't really have much of a reason, just don't like you." their teacher sighed and placed a stack of papers on each of their desk, "Extra homework for you two..." he told them, eyes staying on Lucy a second longer than necessary.

"You ruin my life..." she mumbled. She watched warily as her teacher turned around and stared at her for a eerily long moment before turning around to face the opposite direction,

"Well ugly, that's my job~"

"Gihi!"

Operation Spitball-Fail

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

"I wouldn't be laughin' Gaj!" she threw her rapper at the laughing black haired male, "You know that fat ass always call's the hottest people ugly so basically he called me beautiful and you some ugly fuck in his class." she laughed, he scowled at the sound of her laughter, it was funny up until that point and he grunted in disapproval,

"Shut up..." he grumbled only further increasing her laugh, he groaned and glanced over at her, he was glad she was smiling; it had been awhile but really he should be used to it, she barely ever smiled. He sighed quietly to himself and offered her a cigarette to which she eagerly took and placed it in between her plump lips and laid down, allowing him to light it for her. He looked down at her and chuckled quietly to himself, the outfit she was wearing, he could understand why their teacher had made a comment on her appearance, not that it looked bad but what she was wearing was not appropriate for school. She wore a pair of white ripped skinny jeans, the rips going dangerously close to her ass, black and white high-tops and a black, off-shoulder belly top that had white, spray-painted lettering on the front saying 'Fuck'.

The blonde laid on her back as she stared up at the blue sky, she always liked to stay like this whenever she was kicked out of class or on her break, she let out a puff of smoke, it was just a normal thing for her and Gajeel, to cause trouble for teachers and students then get kicked out of class and go to their hang out. "Anyway, we got anything coming up?" she turned her gaze from the sky and to his face, watching him take another hit before speaking.

"Yeah, got something other than the usual place," he smirked and looked into her chocolate brown eyes. "Night club." her eyes widened in surprise and she tackled him, knees on either side of his torso with her arms pinning his wrist down, he winced, "Dam it bunny you got a fucking grip on ya..." he grumbled. She giggled and let out a lop sided grin,

"Should've remembered that Gaj considering I whooped your ass last year," he rolled his eyes lazily at her boast, "Still can't believe you failed your last grade..." he glared at her and flipped them over so he was now pinning her down to the rooftop; she smirked, "Well, well, well Gaj after how many years of knowing you, you finally show your true colors hmm?" laughing he shook his head,

"About three and a half years now and trust me bunny," he smirked, blowing a puff of smoke in her face and he was both impressed and yet at the same time not surprised by her equanimity. "If I were to ever make a move on you that friend of yours would probably murder me in a heartbeat..." he muttered. She rolled her eyes and smack his shoulder, "Alright, alright." he said before releasing his grip on her and lying beside her, "You do realize that you have to wear uniform tomorrow right?" She glanced over at him,

"You do realize I don't give a fuck right?" he grinned,

"Gihi!" she chuckled and stared up at the sky, letting out a puff of smoke as she did. "What time you gotta be back?" he asked, suddenly realizing the sky was darkening, "You know, I really feel like keeping my balls so..." he trailed off. She glanced at her phone, a small black pouch dangling from the side of it acting as a charm,

"Eh," she yawned. "Better get home now, she'll be mad if I don't eat..." she replied only briefly thinking of the scarlet haired woman's strict rules when it came to her nutrition. She sighed before getting up-with the help of Gajeel- and began to walk toward the edge before jumping down, she could hear her pierced fried laughing behind her and soon she joined in as she climbed down the latter until she was on the ground. She pulled out her key's from her bag before walking p to the black vehicle, smiling as she placed the black helmet over her head and hopped on before glancing around for her friend, "Oi! Gaj, hurry your fat ass up!" she faintly heard a low growl over the roar of her engine and turned to see her best friend,

"I ain't the one with the fat ass bunny," she shrugged knowing he was just annoyed with her remark,

"I'm surprised with your abstinence, Gaj." she smirked at the irritated male, "You getting on or what?" she heard him sigh before she handed him his helmet-or more like _someone's _helmet. He stared at the protective gear in his hands and looked up at her,

"Why the fuck are you giving me the pink helmet!?" she chuckled,

"Normally I ride with the girls and on the odd day that you ride with me," she paused glancing at him. "I usual just give you a bicycle helmet, like the silver one!" she smirked when she saw the agitated look on his face but dismissed it when he got on, an angered look that swore vengeance on his face.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

"Erza I'm home!" the blonde called as she slipped into the illuminated house, she glanced to the side as she kicked off her shoes-seeing the scarlet haired woman as she did- and she nodded in greeting. She walked into the kitchen behind Erza and looked at the food,

"Good you're home!" she cheered, "Dinners just about ready-hey!" she smacked the hand sneaking toward the freshly made food away and glared, "Don't touch the food!" she disdained. "Go wash up." Lucy, in return, rolled her eyes but did not make a sound of disagreement before going to wash up. Erza sighed and looked at the spot the blonde had disappeared to, she clicked her tongue in slight annoyance but she smiled despite herself. She was happy that the blonde was having fun, though she would be lying if she wasn't still concerned.

It had been roughly two years since they started to live together due to some things that had happen in the past and Erza was glad that it was done but she knew that Lucy still had that sliver of a connection to it. She sighed, there was no need for her to think of such things, grabbing the small bottle of medicine she place it on the side of the tray before bringing it and the food over to the dinner table. She wiped her hands on her apron before walking back into the kitchen to wash her hands,

"Lucy, dinners on the table." she called back to her after she dried her hands, hearing the soft footsteps of her best friend followed soon after, they both sat down at the table as Lucy complemented her cooking all the while thanking her for it and she smiled softly as she watched her eat, she wasn't nearly old enough yet, but she felt a certain protectiveness over Lucy that she could only explain as a mother would feel for her own child. "So how was school today?" she asked, taking a bite of her salad as she did,

"... Same as usual," she replied after a brief pause from her eating. She sighed quietly to herself, that's what she always said but she didn't know what the 'usual' was for her, at least, not now. "Don't give me that look Erza," the blonde spoke sternly, noticing the scarlet haired woman's expression,

"Lucy, is it sti-"

"No Erza, it's done..." she interrupted the 21 year olds words, "Its fine now, you don't need to worry anymore..." she mumbled as she finished off the food on her fork before excusing herself, cleaning off the rest of her plate as she did. Rushing to the bathroom with a hand covering her mouth she shut the dolor behind her, blocking out her friends worried sigh, immediately after entering the bathroom she fell to her knees and leaned over the side of the toilet, emptying her stomach of its contents as she did. After awhile she leaned back against the wall, head hanging low as she sighed, she really hated being like this but, she couldn't stop.

Slowly, she rose to her feet and turned on the shower before stripping her body of her clothes, she walked over to the sink and looked at herself in the mirror before laughing, she looked like shit, her hair was in dismay, her makeup was running, some landing on the piercings which were located on her bottom lip to the right while the rest on her nose, left eyebrow and all up the right ear. She glanced at her right arm, seeing her tattoo. She looked like some punk ass teen. She sighed and washed off her make up before taking out her piercings and hopping in the shower.

**.**

**.**

A little while later the blonde turned off the shower and grabbed her towel allowing her to dry herself,

_***Knock, Knock***_

"Lucy?" she heard Erza's voice from the other side of the door but made no signs of answering, "Lucy, make sure you take your pill before you go to- before you rest up…" she re-worded her sentence mid way which the blonde was grateful for. "I'll leave the pill on your desk," she told her before she heard light footsteps walking in the other direction. She sighed, she really hated taking them, it made her feel like there was something wrong with her but then again, there was.

Quickly drying herself off, she got dressed and wrapped the towel around her hair before exiting the bathroom and making a B-line for her room. Turning on her I pod she aloud her music to play quietly as she towel dried her hair, silently, she went over to her desk and looked at the midnight blue pill on her desk, she glared at it even knowing that the pill was neither alive nor could it fear, she still felt the need to look at it harshly; expressing her true hatred for it. Reluctantly, she glanced beside the pill to the class of water, patiently waiting for her to take a drink and even though she hated to admit it, she knew she needed to take it.

"You know you need to take it…" she heard a voice beside her-momentarily freezing her movements- and spared her a glance before continuing her drying.

"Doesn't mean I like to…" she mumbled bitterly.

"But you need to…" she repeated. "And you know you do…" and walked away, trusting she will take the pill without much protest. Dropping the towel to around her shoulders she sighed and grabbed the pill before popping it into her mouth and gulping it down with her glass of water. She grimaced after feeling the small substance slide down her throat,

"Gross," she groaned before falling on her bed, not even bothering to finish drying her hair before closing her eyes.

Though no matter how long she kept them closed, she couldn't sleep and she knew just sitting around on her bed like this wouldn't help; glancing at her clock she saw it was well past 1AM and groaned before getting up and pulling on a pair of black short shorts and slipping on a sweater. She grabbed her phone and made sure the black baggy was still attached to it before plugging in her headphones. She quietly walked out of her room and passed the living room,

"Lucy?" she cursed under her breath hearing the scarlet haired woman's voice. "What are you doing up?" she paused, " Did you even take you pills?" She sighed,

"Yeah Erza, I just couldn't sleep…" she said while pulling on her sneakers. "Ill be going out for a jog…" she said as she turned on her music,

"Okay…" she heard her reply and opened the door. "Just come back soon…" her voice sounded a little sad but she decided to ignore it, slamming the door as she blasted her music missing the last few words meant for her, "Be careful…"

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

The blonde sighed as she came to a stop in her midnight jog and looked up at the night sky, pausing her music as she did and let out a breath of air as she walked toward the canal. She chewed her bottom lip-a habit she had developed awhile back when she was thinking- as she turned her attention to the water bellow, she remembered how she used to walk on the ledge beside the canal everyday on her way home from school, she chuckled remembering the one time she actually did fall in.

Pushing herself up with what strength she had in her arms she lifted herself up and onto the ledge, one leg dangling over the edge and the other pulled close to her with her arm rested on top. Leaning back she looked up at the sky; more specifically the shining stars that reflected in her eyes, things were just so different from before weren't they? A bubbly laugh erupted from her lips and her lips quirked up if only slightly, even now she was just a Ingénue. A mere adolescent that needed to be watched over every second of the day. Back then she would have never even thought anything like she had, but time changes people.

Her thought's soon turned sour as she began brooding over a certain salmon haired male she knew. Thinking of his amicable behavior and his impetuous actions just put her off and she knew that but she refused to admit it. Even just something so small and stupid made her think about him, she laughed bitterly, she just couldn't let go, huh? She sighed and looked up to the sky, only to feel a small drop land on her cheek before she could hear the many small noises of the rain dropping on the pavement. Her eyes reflected the moon and she couldn't help but wonder what darkness the moon hid behind its beautiful features. Maybe she and the moon were quite alike in some twisted way.

She chuckled, not bothered by the fact that she was completely soaked, her hair and clothes both disheveled and her make-up running down the sides of her face, to any person passing by she would have looked like someone who was lost but she was still in her right mind. Sighing, she closed her eyes in silent bliss, allowing the rain to only further dampen her clothing. This was what her life was like; never bright, always in the darkness of the light. Her lips curled up and she stared at the stars, each twinkling brighter with every blink she made, her grip tightened on her shirt,

Why was she so weak?

She couldn't go one day without thinking of it. Her eyes darkened as she realized her own weakness; she needed to get rid of it that was the only way she could save herself, right? Looking down at herself she couldn't help the disgusted look that crossed over her face when her eyes focused on the marks littering her body; that was his way of not letting her forget. She hummed, she could forget, looking down at the small bag in her hand she grabbed one of its contents before drinking it down with her water, a tear slipped from her eye, and she couldn't help the laugh that erupted from her mouth, she truly was weak.

Her mind raced, thinking of how things turned out in her life and she deducted one thing; she was one screwed up person. If she could even be called that anymore. She snorted, she definitely couldn't be called a person anymore; she was more like the shattered pieces of a broken doll. Each piece broken for a reason whether by accident, on purpose or just simply from time, she was shattered into a million pieces never to be whole again.

And maybe she liked it that way.

The faint sound of raindrops soothed her, acting as a lullaby for her and she pat her leg, looking at the time as she did. It was already well past 3 AM but Erza wouldn't worry and she knew it, wasn't the first time she had been out late like this, heck sometimes she wouldn't even come home. She sighed at her screwed up life, if it weren't for him then maybe... maybe things could have been different. Though, by this whole experience she couldn't help but laugh, she learned that you can't trust anyone properly. She hated him, loathed him and yet how did he always manage to make her feel so broken? Glancing down at her arms she laughed,

**"I'm here again  
A thousand miles away from you  
a broken mess  
Just scattered pieces of who I am  
I tried so hard  
Thought I could do this on my own  
I've lost so much along the way."**

She laughed, how pathetic can she be? Glancing up, she for once was glad that there weren't many houses nearby to see her pathetic state; she gripped the ledge tighter, making her knuckles turn white. She loved being like this, a screwed up teenager who didn't give a fuck about life or what happened to her mind was claimed by one while her body was marked as another, everything that happened back then, 4 years and counting, she smirked, 3 fucking years and she lost a love, 2 years and she became a puzzle that others couldn't solve, 1 year and she has become something devoted to the past. With one last breath she snapped her head up to the midnight sky filled with stars, and released an agonizing scream that could only describe herself.

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Its scary what a smile can hide**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered_Nightmares712: Hey guys, another quick update! Hopefully you guys have enjoyed what you have read so far because I am enjoying writing this story. So we got a glimpse of what Lucy is like in this story, but can you guess why she turned out like that? So Gajeel obviously play's a big part in Lucy's life, can any of you guess why? Well anyway I hope you guys have enjoyed this chapter; let us know what you guys think, 'kay? The song that was used is called 'Pieces' by I have no idea who since it was nightcore. Net update should be either 'Hell's Gate' or 'Lost in the Lies.'**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: As you can see we are back and now you have had a glance at both Natsu and Lucy's lives, if there is anything you guys are confused about feel free to ask us and we will answer to the best of our abilities. Not much to say but our March break is over  
:( which means less updates and this will probably be the last update for a week or so, depends though because Ana is busy with her other updates too now that she has another story up, but one last question, what do you think of the new Lucy?  
Don't forget to write a review, see ya!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	4. Chapter 3: Obscure

**Been awhile,**

**My computer is still being an ass so**

**It's taking me awhile to type my chapters for the stories**

**Hopefully you guys can understand though,**

**I am exceptionally proud of this chapter,**

**The beginning may be a little bit confusing but you may get it by the**

**End of it so just read it carefully so**

**You will understand it better and if you have any questions**

**Write a review and I will PM you back and try to answer them to the best of my ability.**

**Also regret 'She Who Read's the Stars' I'm thinking of either putting it on Hiatus or discontinuing it all together.**

**I will not put it up for adoption though so yeah, just warning you.**

**So I'm going to stop blabbing**

**And let you continue on with the story**

**Chapter 3**

**~QOoOQ~**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**She's on a thin line between giving up &amp; seeing how much she can take**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 3: Obscure**

**~QOoOQ~**

_"Hey," she breathed out in relief as the call connected._

_"Hey." She heard him answer, equal amount relief heard in his voice._

_"How is everything down there?" she asked as she stared out the window, gazing at the stars,_

_"Ah, doin' good, it's a little better than before, were just resting now. How's everything there?" his voice seemed to falter slightly at the beginning but she decided not to press the matter, knowing he hated talking about it._

_"That's great to here." She smiled slightly before pausing, "… Nothing much has changed here…" she stopped short remembering that she had something extremely important to tell him and then ask him something else relating to the matter. "Listen I-I need to tell you about something,"_

_"Yeah, go ahead you can tell me anything Lucy, you know that." She smiled and played with the chain around her neck before giggling breathily,_

_"Yeah, yeah I know that. Heh, it's actually pretty silly to get so worked up over this…" she sighed nervously, "I-I might, No-I am-"_

**_*BOOM!"_**

_"Guys!? What's going on!?" she heard him yell over the loud noises on his end,_

_"The Enemy's have infiltrated our base. We have to escape 'Shooter'!"_ _her heart skipped at the familiar voice of his comrade panicking on the other end._

**_"Eccoli!" _**_She heard the unmistakable voice of a different language which she could only decipher as Italian in which case she knew what was going on-feeling the sting of tears in her eyes._

_"Damn their here already!"_

_"What's going on there!?" her desperation came through the other end of the phone but she was ignored as the man she had been speaking to just moments ago began to speak to the Italian speaking men._

_"You guys don't wanna do this! Put the gun down…"_

**_"Sai cosa fare." _**_she gasped, her heart thudding painfully against her chest._

_"Put the guns do-AGGH!" she heard his scream of pain and clamped a hand over her mouth "Gughh Lu-cy…_**_*Gasp* _**_-ve you…"_

_"Oh my god! Babe!? Babe!? What's happening!?" she called out._

_"B-Babe!?" Again she yelled frantically into the phone, her tears spilling over as her desperation became unbearable to the silence._

_"Come on!"_

_"Y-You promised-_**_*Sob*_**_!" she cried. He had promised her just before he left her and now with everything she's heard she wasn't sure if he was going to ever be able to keep that promise to the end._

_"You p-promised you would come back to m-me!"_

**_…_**

**_*Gasp!*_**

She sat there in her bed, coated in her own sweat, panting and shaking violently from the commemoration. She let out a shaky breath and raced to the bathroom, her whole upper body leaning over the side of the toilet. Her sobs were heard mixing with the sound of her emptying the contents of her stomach. She wanted to forget but the guilt continued to eat away at her every time she wished it, she wanted to and yet she didn't. She shook and sat up slightly before leaving her aching head over her arms resting on the lid. Soon she felt a comforting hand rubbing her back as she continued to cry,

"Was it about _him_?" it was Erza. She was leaning up against the wall beside her with her head facing upward so she was staring at the ceiling. The blonde shook her head,

"No, it was about t-the call…" Erza looked down at the ring around her own finger with sad eyes; she knew that it still pained Lucy to remember what she had heard that day and she wanted nothing more than to be able to take it away but she knew that no matter how long it'd been since then, nothing could stop the dull ache.

"Come on…" she whispered, patting Lucy's back as she stood up. "Get cleaned up, I'll make your favorite for breakfast…"

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

"Finally!" the salmon haired man groaned as he fell to the ground outside their tour bus. "Lets us never be departed again ground~" he sighed, keeping himself extremely close to the ground-more so than others would like to be. It had been around a month since the boys announced the end of their tour, preparations taking much longer then they had thought necessary although once they saw the numerous fans screaming out in rage about them taking a break, they were quite grateful.

"…Are you seriously kissing the ground 'ya pyro?" Natsu glanced back at his claimed 'rival', Gray Fullbuster and tried not to roll his eyes at him. The 'Ice-Prick' as he liked to call him was dressed in their new schools uniform-like the rest of them. The uniform consisted of a white button-up shirt, navy blue jacket and matching pants along with a pair of brown loafers with a navy blue and white striped tie, the emblem of their school being on the end of it. "You're such a fuckin' pussy…" he heard him sigh and glared at him.

"Shut the fuck up Ice-Prick!" he challenged, "you know I can't even look at a moving-" he groaned as he watched the rest of his band mates come off the bus, allowing it to drive away from them. He heard the low rumble of laughter and turned to glare at the ginger,

"You deserved that Natsu, every. Single. Minute." Turning away from the pathetic looking-male on the ground and walking with the rest of the group toward their new school. Onyx eyes narrowed at the retreating forms before reluctantly following behind them.

"Oh my god It's_ 'Catching Fire'~!"_

"Man! They look so cool!"

"They're as hot in person as they are on T.V!"

"I heard they used to live here…"

"I heard that too! Think it's true!?"

Ignoring all the thunderous squeals and roaring comments from the students around them, Loke glanced at the unfamiliar surroundings. He still couldn't believe they were back after four years away from home, but they were really here and he could only hope that this wasn't a cruel dream that he would wake up to find everything as it was those years before, but surely, this was reality.

Soon, after a bit of exploring the inner part of the building, they heard angry shouts and faint screams,

"STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!" The gingers eyes widened at the voice as did the rest of the band members and quickly, they ran toward the source of the voice to come face to face with a crowd which they could only assume were a bunch of bystanders watching a fight. Then what was that voice…? "WHAT DID YOU SAY!?" Again they were startled at how familiar the voice was and pushed their way through the crowd, ignoring the gasps of recognition and the groans of protest before coming to the front of the group.

"LUCY!?" The sight before them left them freezing on the spot. All of them were shocked by what they were seeing, she was wearing the school uniform as expected, her long sleeved, white, button-up dress shirt was rolled up to the elbows with her navy blue jacket loosely tied around her hips, her top two buttons were undone exposing a large amount of her cleavage and her tie-which was similar to the men's- was hanging loosely around her neck. Her skirt-like the rest of the girls- were particularly short with it matching the colors of the school-navy blue, black and white- although she had a slit up the side of her left leg and the thin cloth was hanging dangerously low on her hips. Here knee high sock and brown loafers were the only things that every girl had the same-including herself.

Natsu's eyes widened when he took in her appearance-despite her un-bashful way of using the uniform she had multiple piercings climbing up the rim of her left ear while the other had a cartilage piercing, her eyebrows and nose were also pierced and from what he could tell form the high-rising uniform shirt she had a belly-button piercing to go with the others. A black tattoo decorated her right arm and what it was he could not see due to the white shirt but she also had one on her left middle finger that read 'survivor' with a helmet atop a gun with a small bleeding heart on it beside the word. Around her neck were two different necklaces that were partially blocked by her shirt. Her hair had hot pink ends but the rest was still the same, beautiful golden color as four years ago, although now it reached below her shoulder-blades.

Her face was scrunched together in anger as she gripped onto-what he assumed to be- a jocks shirt, the man was much larger than her small, delicate-looking form but by the way she was holding him up by the color of his shirt anyone would have assumed that she was older when in reality it probably was the opposite. Blood was plastered on her hands and up her arms, only some on her face as the males nose looked like it had been broken. Though, despite her new and shocking appearance he still couldn't help but see the shy, little girl standing next to her.

"Don't you ever say shit about my life-!" this came as a surprise to all of them, they had never heard the blonde curse so much in their life, the off-chance that she did she would end up in tears later for it, apologizing to her parents for having such a foul mouth. Although, the girl standing before them was the opposite of that sweet little girl they once knew. She roughly shoved the student toward his 'buddies' as they all stared there gaping at her as she spat, "-you don't know shit about me or what I have gone through so don't think you have the right to assume so!" Finally snapping out of his stupor Natsu stepped forward, a hand reaching out to her form,

"Luce?" Her head snapped in his direction at the sound of his voice and he watched the faint widening of her eyes in slight recognition before her earlier scowl returned to her face.

**_*Crack*_**

She shook her hands off, splashing some of the remaining blood toward the bystanders before she turned around and growled at the students blocking her path, he heard one of the students yell at her saying that she was to report to the principle for immediate punishment to which she simply flipped him the bird and left.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

"Three people, Lucy!" she rolled her eyes and tapped her –now- clean fingers on the arm rest of the chair she was sitting in beside her childhood friends-who were also known as the band _'Catching Fire'_ and half-heartedly listened to their principles lecture. "You have beaten 3 of my students in the whole month since school started!" he glared at her before sighing and running a hand down in exasperation, he knew no matter what he said nothing was going to get through to her and yet, no matter how much the staff wanted, he could not expel the girl. "…What was it this time?" he reluctantly asked after a moments silence.

"Basically the same bullshit as the last-what? Two times?" she grinned at him before continuing, "He was sayin' shit about me and my life. He doesn't know a fuckin' thing and so I clocked 'em one…"

"Then why did you hit Natsu, Lucy?" he gestured to the salmon haired male icing his nose beside her and she shrugged,

"I promised to…" she heard him sigh and listened to the sound of his pencil moving across a shit of paper before he stopped. He grinned,

"You my dear, will be having detention for a month-" he smirked down at her, ignoring the blank stares he was receiving from the five other males in the room, "-and you will be performing at any school event I ask-without payment~" she groaned at his words and glared. "Or you can be suspended for a month and not graduate…?" she stared at the paper outreached toward her and sighed before roughly grabbing it from his hands and mumbling,

"Give me the damn paper…" before leaving the room, slamming the door behind her in the process. The elder male turned to the boys with a smile before folding his hands on the desk in front of him,

"I'm sorry you had to witness that but-" he rubbed his temples, "-as you can see she has a temper. Anyhow, here are your schedules-I had them done for you before you came," they nodded, "Jellal, I will be asking you to help out around the student council-thank you for volunteering by the way."

"Not a problem."

"Um, Mr. Dreyar-" it was Macbeth who spoke up then,

"Just call me Makarov or something-the kids don't really listen to me anyway…" he chuckled.

"-Okay _Makarov_, how are we going to find our classes? Are we going to have someone tour us…" at that he grinned-almost sinfully.

"Actually that young lady who was in here a few moments ago-" he pointed to the door, "Has most of the same classes with you- Natsu, Loke you both have all the same classes as her while the rest of you-" he looked to Gray and Midnight, "Have the same classes as the rest after homeroom. So she will be your guide, but you need to catch up with her first~!" they nodded before shuffling out of the room to search for their blonde childhood friend.

Natsu couldn't help but stare at the ground as they walked down the deserted hallways, what had she meant when she told the principle that she had promised to punch him? When had she promised that? And what happened to the sweet little girl that he had loved all these years?

"Lucy!" at Loke's call Natsu snapped out of his thoughts and jogged after his friends to meet up with the blonde. He watched the ginger hug her and smile, "I missed you-why didn't you tell me about , this?" he gestured to her knew look and she just chuckled before pulling back and shaking her head,

"You probably wouldn't 'a believed me if I told you…" she smirked, "Anyway what do 'ya idiots want?" she placed her hands on her hips, "excluding you Jellal." He nodded before Gray spoke up,

"What? We can't come have a reunion with a friend we haven't seen in four years?" she snorted and gave him a quick hug,

"Not if you guys came chasing me down like that… You only do that when you want something," she shook her head after greet the bluenette and 'Macbeth' as she liked to call him. "So lemme' ask again, what do you want?" Loke scratched the back of his head anxiously,

"Ah, well you see-" after he briefly explained what they had been told they heard her curse under her breath,

"Damn, that old man what are you doing?" she sighed and turned to them, "Well hurry up and follow me if your gonna'." She-again- released a frustrated breath before shoving her hands in the pocket of her jacket and walking away, boys in tow.

...

Lucy had introduced the boys to their second period teacher, who was not keen on their tardiness but let them off with a warning since it was their first day. The blonde leaned back in her chair, only half listening to the teacher's words about English work, silently, she plugged in her headphones but a loud squeal-that somehow did not disturb the teacher- and rose a brow at the brunette with the huge smile.

"Oh my god I wish that this would be my boyfriend!" She glanced at the magazine in her friends hand, she decided to name her 'bitch #1' while the blue and orange haired girls were two and three.

"Yeah he's so dreamy~" Bitch #2 sighed dreamily- Lucy guessed- from having the wishful thoughts. She rolled her eyes, did they not know there was no point in even wishing for their 'perfect' man?

"Not to mention perfect!" Bitch #3 concluded,

"Do you think he would ever date me?" Bitch #1 asked, hope shimmering in her eyes that Lucy desperately wished to crush, "I mean, I met him once and he called me beautiful~" she gushed while the other bitches smiled. They were so naive.

"Of course!"

"He'll be the one! Definitely!"

"But what about Takeshi? I thought you and him had a thing going on...?" Bitch #3.

"Well I think we do, and he's prefect! But I'm still waiting for a romantic gesture." The teacher at that time asked for a student to describe the relationships between characters of the book they were reading, she shrugged, the question was easy especially for her grade and having enough of the Bitch group she walked up to the board and grabbed a piece of chalk.

"Girls!" she grabs the classes attention to see a beautifully drawn heart torn in two. "Stop waiting for that 'perfect man'. He's not out there. There's no such thing as fairy tales. Your life isn't a fucking 80's movie. If you push that boy away, he's not gonna come back and comfort you. He's gonna leave. Life isn't like the movie's or animes. Stop expecting it to be." The class was shocked to say the least- the sudden outburst from the blonde surprised a handful of students-being the band members- while the rest were shocked for a totally different reason. Natsu stared at her, why was she like this? What happened to that little girl from four years ago?

"Miss. Heart-"

"Yeah, Yeah I know detention, who gives a shit and don't ever call me by that horrid name." Natsu decided to ask her something that had been bothering him since she had decided to ignore his presences since she punched him that morning.

"But what if the girl let the guy go instead," for the first time in four years he made eye contact with her. Four years and she was completely different, the light in her eyes was dead, the smile she would show to only him was broken and the sweet and caring Lucy was trampled on by the new her; the delinquent. She glared at him, turning her body away and stepped toward the door.

"Chances are, if she cut you off then you handed her the scissors."

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

She let out a frustrated sigh and ran a hand through her hair, she just couldn't stay in there a minute longer otherwise she probably would have done something completely reckless, although upsetting the class like that probably wasn't the best idea either but, she shrugged, she didn't give two shit's. She snorted slightly remembering her childhood friends shocked expressions; they looked so pathetic like that and she couldn't help the quirk of her lip. None of them understood why she was the way she was and she could see it in the expressions they wore; they were like open books-she used to be that way, a long time ago she used to be so easy to read, so open minded, so-so _innocent_.

Now look at her. She laughed, she was calling the boys pathetic and yet she had no right to say it to them; she was pathetic-more so then any of them but she refused to admit it openly. She sighed and leaned her head back against the brick wall on the edge of the roof; glancing down she grabbed the two chains around her neck, both items on the end of each chain were special to her and the person they originally belonged to and although she knew that she needed to let go it just kept coming back to her; tightening its hold on her, pulling her farther and farther away from freedom.

Maybe she was just foolish, thinking that she couldn't escape when she really could, maybe it was just her subconscious playing tricks on her but she doubted it, everything she did was revolved around past events and even now she was still drowning in her memories. Though with Natsu and the guys coming back it just dug up old memories that she had locked away; she pulled her knees closer and covered her ears with her hands before shaking her head rapidly, she didn't want to feel, she didn't want to see, she didn't want to hurt, she didn't want to remember but she didn't want to forget.

With trembling hands she reached for the small black bag attached to her phone and pulled out a small fraction of its contents before swallowing it whole and returning to her previous position. Every time she was in this position she would always ask herself, was it worth it? Was it worth seeing everything die before you? Did it make you happy that these things happened? Who was the girl you used to be and where had she gone? Where is your 'home', safe haven? Who is she? And what has she become?

She groaned and peered up at the smell of cigarette smoke to see her best friend; Black Steel Gajeel. She stared at him for a moment, some of her questions were immediately answered after seeing the black haired male, he gave her a safe haven and gave her a chance at escape; she was grateful, truly grateful that Gajeel had even bothered to talk to someone such as herself. Before she met him she was always immersed in something else, never once truly being there, off in another world like she wasn't meant to be the one she was living in.

She was broken and he was bruised, she was bloodied and he was damned, she was barely breathing and he had a barrier; Gajeel saw all these things in her and for that he approached her. He saw their similarity's, he saw that Lucy was cracked and that she wasn't all she was called out to be, she was simply _different _from the fakes in the school, she knew pain, not just loosing someone, sousing herself as well as everyone around her, forgetting herself and what it felt like to be alive. He glanced up at her before smirking,

"You done freaking' out Bunny-girl," his guttural voice reached her ears in a teasing way and she groaned,

"Just give me the damn cigarette," her brittle voice made him chuckle slightly before handing her the cigarette and sitting next to her on the ground. "Why are you up here anyway?" she took a hit and blew out the smoke as she smoke, seeing him shrug from her peripheral vision.

"Got caught skipping." he stated matter of fact,

"Then how-you know what, I'm not even going to ask." He chuckled at her words and stole his nicotine filled stick back, ignoring her whines of protest before opening his back and handing her its contents.

"Thought you might like that more," and love she did. In her hands was a fresh, beer bottle that she had been craving since the start of the day. She smiled slightly and nudged his sighed to which he smirked at her and opened one for himself, "You done with your 'I'm a piece of shit and nobody knows it but myself and I am a piece of shit lie the rest of those _'Catching idiots''_ party?"

She laughed at his remark and let out a soft sigh and sipped at her drink; starring at the passing clouds, "Bunny-girl?" she heard her best friend call, she nodded slightly and let out a hum of recognition, pressing him to continue. "Are you alright?" she paused mid-sip at this before pulling the beer glass away from her lips. She wanted to ask him to define 'being alright'. That, she didn't know herself, was being alright feeling lost Or was being fine meaning in general? She sighed and answered in a toneless voice;

"Yeah, I'm fine…" she looked away.

**...**

_'Just a little broken.'_

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**She stands up and erases the blood like nothing happened; when, really the broken pieces cut her the more she hides.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Hey guys so they finally meet! Although there reunion was probably not the best they could have had but this is Lucy so… Anyway, what did you guys think of the new chapter? I thought that it was pretty good if I do say so myself, the beginning was not actually planned but I decided to put it in there-you will understand later when it begins to play out. That last quote there I actually made up so I hope you guys like it. So as I haven't mentioned it yet, Lucy is half Italian from her mother's side, Jude and Layla met in Italy and had Lucy there before moving we she was 3 so Italian is her first language and English or Japanese is I guess is her second.**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727 : Well thank you for reading guys! I have to go though because I have to babysit a bunch of kids! Which Shattered-Nightmares712 has so kindly laughed at my expense, she's a great friend isn't she? Hopefully you guys enjoyed this chapter and we will see more about Lucy in the next chapter! We're both tired from school but luckily we get a day off tomorrow so Shattered-Nightmares712 may update another story so watch out for that~! See you guys and don't for get to review~!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	5. Chapter 4: There's Nothing

**We're back with another chapter!**

**What do you guys think so far hm?**

**Bad? Good?**

**Hopefully it's something positive but you never know.**

**well anyway we get to see a little more of Lucy and Natsu's 'thoughts' so to say**

**and see a little more drama~**

**The song used in this is at the bottom of the chapter in the**

**A/N's so if you want to get the title then **

**check at the bottom of the chapter.**

**Well its really late or early I guess since now-when I typed this-**

**it's 2AM, Stroke-of-Midnight87727's probably going to be pissed that **

**I woke her up with an update but oh well.**

**Enjoy~**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Apology accepted. Trust denied.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 4: There's nothing**

**~QOoOQ~**

The next two periods were agonizingly long for Natsu, he hadn't seen Lucy since the scene she had made in second period and she was nowhere to be found during their lunch break, he still wasn't really processing the fact that _his _Lucy was so different. Things were different, he knew that, it had been four years since they've seen each other for Mavis sake but what he did not expect was for her to completely ignore his existence and for that he was stressed. He could feel the painful thud of his heart as he thought of the lack of attention he was receiving from the blonde, he thought that the moment she saw him, Lucy would come running and give him a hug-but reality hit him at full force, shattering his fantasy.

He was completely in the dark on the subject as to why Lucy was being so _indifferent- _as he liked to put it-towards him. He glanced to the side at his band mates-being Loke, Midnight and Gray- he noticed how they had all avoided the topic of Lucy around him and he was curious as to why they were being so sensitive about it, obviously he was hearting and the painful beating of his heart could back it up but he wasn't some fragile doll to be handled to delicately. "I wonder where Luce is..." he quite mumbled-unbeknownst to him- caught the attention of his three companions, causing them to look-over at him.

Gray averted his eyes from the salmon haired singer in slight pity, he knew very well that his rival was confused about their blonde childhood friend and wanted to ask her so much but he knew better than to say anything. His own opinion on the topic would not bring any assurance to the nineteen-year-old and so he kept a tight lip and did his best to ignore the atmosphere beside him. As they continued to walk he let his thoughts wander to Lucy, she had changed much more then he had originally thought he knew she would be different considering the time gap but he did not predict the total flip of personality that she did. Was there more behind what she let on? He knew a few things but it wasn't enough for four years and certainly not enough to make her into _that. _He shook his head-ridding all thoughts of the blonde, this wasn't like him and the sounds of Natsu's continuous whining was getting annoying-although to Gray, Natsu even breathing pissed him off. "Would you stop bitchin' like a four-year-old lookin' for his 'mommy'!" he snapped.

Natsu's eyes narrowed in annoyance at the sound of his rivals voice, could he not just shut up for a moment and let him wallow away in his self-pity? His eyes hardened. What was wrong with him? He was passing up a chance to fight the raven haired bastard next to him to think whatever pathetic thoughts he had been-never would that happen. "What did you say 'ya Ice-Bastard!?" he growled out, knocking foreheads with him as they walked into their fifth period class.

"You heard me Flame-shit!" he barked back.

"At least I don't lick popsicles in the middle of winter!"

"And what's so wrong with that!?"

They continued their heated argument, ignorant of the fact that the bell had long gone and the teacher was now growing quite impatient as he stalked over to the two fighting adults, "Okay! That's enough of that!" he broke them apart and sat them down in their seats before walking to the front of the classroom, catching the attention of the few students that actually decided to take the course. "We have four new students joining our class today guys-which you probably have already heard about but anyway-!" Loke raised a brow at the males sloppy way of introducing them, this teacher was different from the others,"-for the newcomers my name is Mr. Clive but just call me Gildarts-it makes me sound old calling me 'Mr." He grinned lazily before continuing, "Well as most of you know-we have been writing our own music and have been presenting it for the past few days and have a couple more left. So will the following please get reading for your performance-I will be marking you on this." He paused as he shuffled the papers in his hands to read off the names, "Juvia Lockser,"

"Gray-sama~"

"Gajeel Redfox."

"Gihi!"

"And Lucy... Ashley. You are the last one's who have yet to perform, Juvia, you're up." At the mention of her name the bluenette walked onto the small stage behind Gildarts and began to play her piece-though Natsu was too distracted with his thoughts to listen. His head had immediately snapped over to a certain person once her name was spoken and he stared wide-eyed at her, it was Lucy-sitting in a chair close to them, bobbing her head to the rhythm the girl previously named 'Juvia' had created with her guitar. He couldn't believe she was in this class and he was guessing by the conversation of his band mates that they too, were surprised at the announced. He could hear Midnight and Gray guessing what instruments she was going to play Gray guessing the piano since she had perfected it at a young age but was quickly dismissed by the knowledge of her new attitude. Loke had stayed silent throughout the entire performance, seemingly uninterested in the 'guess what Lucy will play' game and clapped as the bluenette finished her guitar solo.

"Lucy, you're up." Their conversation and thoughts halted at the mention of her name and they watched the male they were informed to be 'Gajeel' and an unknown, petite, bluenette walk up with her. They watched the pierced male walk behind the drum set, set up on stage and the bluenette pick up a base guitar before plugging it into an amp while Lucy-much to their surprise- picked up a electric guitar and stood behind the microphone. She took a deep breath before her fingers began to dance across the strings,

.

**"Are you aware of what**  
**You make me feel, baby**  
**Right now I feel invisible to you**  
**Like I'm not real**  
**Didn't you feel me lock my arms around you**  
**Why'd you turn away **  
**Here's what I have to say."**

Their eyes widened-opposite to the class- and stared at the blonde in shock, she had a decent voice to begin with when they were still young and were a garage band but they had never thought she would sound as good as she was. Loke though, was leaned back against his seat with a smug smile on his face and light reflecting off his glasses.

**"I was left to cry there**  
**Waiting outside there**  
**Grinning with the lost stare**  
**That's when I decided.**

**Why should I care**  
**'Cause you weren't there **  
**When I was scared**  
**I was so alone.**

**You, you need to listen**  
**I'm startin' to trip**  
**I'm losing my grip **  
**And I'm in this thing alone**  
**(oh oh yeah)"**

Natsu leaned forward and clasped his hands in front of him before resting his forehead against them and closing his eyes, listening to the power in her voice, had she really written this song on her own? She sounded so lonely...

**"Am I just some chick**  
**You placed beside you**  
**To take somebody's place?**  
**When you turn around.**

**Can you recognize my face?**  
**You used to love me**  
**You used to hug me**  
**But that wasn't the case **  
**Everything wasn't ok."**

His mind raced with thoughts of the blonde, her lyrics had a large affect on him and he could have sworn that she had made eye-contact with him while she was singing the last verse; could these words be meant for him? But how? If they were in fact meant for him then why-what was her meaning for this? He watched her close her eyes as her face scrunched in concentration-something he hadn't seen for so long.

**"I was left to cry there **  
**Waiting outside there**  
**Grinning with a lost stare **  
**That's when I decided.**

**Why should I care**  
**'Cause you weren't there when I was scared**  
**I was so alone**  
**You, you need to listen**  
**I'm starting to trip **  
**I'm losing my grip**  
**And I'm in this thing alone."**

Her voice travelled throughout the room, mixing perfectly with the music the other two had been playing the whole time. The music began to intensify and he felt as if he was seeing pictures in the background as she played the music, in his mind he was seeing the once plain, boring, white room being splattered with black and red paint, two colors that were both familiar and yet unknown to him.

**"Crying out loud**  
**I'm crying out loud**  
**Crying out loud**  
**I'm crying out loud**  
**Open your eyes**  
**Open up wide.**

**Why should I care**  
**Cause you weren't there when I was scared**  
**I was so alone**  
**Why should I care."**

He didn't understand what was going on but Natsu would always say _'Music explains millions that words can't' _and this made him feel like there was much, _much _more behind her lyrics.

**"'Cause you weren't there when I was scared **  
**I was so alone**  
**Why should I care**  
**If you don't care then I don't care.**

**We're not going anywhere**  
**Why should I care**  
**'Cause you weren't there when I was scared**  
**I was so alone.**

**Why should I care**  
**If you don't care then I don't care**  
**We're not going anywhere."**

With one last strum the music slowed to a stop and the whole room was left in silence, the only sound being the blondes rough breathing before the thunderous claps began to bounce around the room and they smiled slightly before Lucy walked back over to Gajeel and slapped his hand in a high-five and hugged the bluenette. The rest of the class Natsu continued to burn holes in the back of the chocolate brown eyed girls head-doing his best to ignore the tune-deaf man-previously mentioned as the blonde's drummer and he couldn't help but scowl when he saw her plug her headphones in with a large smirk spread across her face.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

"Lucy!" she let out a low frustrated sigh at being chased after immediately after the bell as she raced out of the school to go home. The salmon haired male yelled as he ran to catch up her, "Wait!" He grabbed her arm and spun her around to face him, forcing her to look him in the eye for the third time that day, she glared heatedly at him, not wanting to even be near him at the moment as she bit back an insult and jerked her arm away.

"What?" she growled, her mood immediately darkening as he had stopped her directly in front of her motorcycle, he sighed in relief that she had actually waited for his response.

"Forgive me Luce! Please, trust me! I'm sorry!" his voice sounded sincere but the blonde did not relent as she kept her glare straight on him.

"Natsu, do you even know what you're apologizing for?" she asked quietly, refusing to giving him the pleasure of reassurance.

"No but please trust me Lucy!" he begged, "Trust me! I never meant to hurt you in whatever way I did! Please forgive me Luce!" her stare intensified at his words and she took another step toward her awaiting vehicle.

"Forgive?" she laughed darkly-and turned a sharp glare on him as he stepped back in shock. Lucy had never looked so angry in her entire life and for that anger to be directed back to him shook his word greatly, "forgiving someone Natsu, is easy," he sighed in relief and a small, shaky smile appeared on his face as he took a step closer, barely processing the sound of an engine starting. She glared at him sharply through the visor of her helmet before hissing, "But being able to trust them again is a totally different story." With that she sped out of the school parking lot, allowing Natsu to stare at her back with a lost look in his eyes.

"Natsu!" he turned around slightly to see his band mates running up to him with Jellal in tow-looking as if he had a long day, "why'd you run off like that so fast right after the bell?" he shook his head,

"It's nothing." Midnight eyed him suspicious, not really believing his hollow reassurance but let it drop before turning to the 'mother' of the group-Jellal, "So what are we going to do now?" they all turned to the bluenette at that and watched as he pulled out his phone with a tired grin,

"We're going to go see Erza," he stated, his face lighting even more after saying her name. Midnight watched as Loke crept behind Jellal and peered over his shoulder to read what was on his screen,

"You're a secret stalker aren't you?" his voice came out as quiet to them but to Jellal-it seemed as if he was yelling at him and he jumped in response allowing the ginger haired male to grab a hold of his phone and take off running with it. "Jellal's a stalker! Jellal's a stalker!" he chanted as he ran down the sidewalk, they heard Gray snort and call after the 'four eyed' male.

"How!?" slowly, he came to a stop-Jellal's phone still in hand as he slowly turned around with a shit-eating grin plastered on his face and he swore-there was a gleam of evil in the gingers eye,

"He searched up Erza's address on Facebook!" he laughed as he held up the phone to show them.

"Jellal..." Gray shook his head in mock disappointment, "You were calling out on Loke for being a pervert and yet all this time you were a closet pervert yourself..." he clicked his tongue in what the bluenette assumed to be disapproval and he couldn't help the scowl that replaced his smile.

"Loke-" his eyes betrayed the stoic and calm expression he held on his face as the gleam in his eyes intensified, "I'm going to-" he took a step closer with his hands outstretched to the retreating flirt, "-TO KILL YOU!" and with that the chase began.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

Jellal knocked-as calmly as he could- on the door to Erza's home, it had been so long since he had last seen her and he wasn't sure if he could decipher up from down. His eyes brightened while his hands shook as small thuds of approaching footsteps came from the other side of the door and he shifted his legs in anticipation as the sound of the lock clicking was heard. Instantly the door opened to reveal scarlet hair, something he had missed in the past four years-she had changed so much, her scarlet colored hair had grown longer and her bust had grown large, her curves-if possible- were even more visible than before and she looked beautiful in the white apron around her waist. "Jellal?" a hand covered her mouth as she gasped out his name, surprise and disbelief were evident in her eyes as she stared at him-ignoring the rest of the boys behind him. He raised a hand, a soft smile on his lips,

"Hey, Erza..." immediately he felt the weight of the brown eyed girls body against his as her arms wrapped themselves around his torso-him returning the embrace with just as much strength. "I missed you..." he whispered into her hair, his breath hot against the sensitive skin of her neck. She smiled and closed her eyes,

"I missed you too..." they stayed there in each other's arms, confirming that the other was really there but their sweet reunion was cut short as the sound of a throat being cleared was heard from behind them. Both separated from the other, faces a few shades darker then they had been previous to the intimate greeting. She smiled awkwardly before hugging the boys, "I missed you all too..." she declared before inviting them in her home and closing the door. "How did you know where I lived?" she decided to ask as she prepared some tea,

"Ah~ Jellal said he checked your Facebook status~" she heard the unmistakably smooth voice of Loke and she swore that he was wearing a shit-eating grin at the moment-having it directed to her blue-haired childhood friend.

"Oi! Don't say things like that!" she heard Jellal argue, "It makes me sound like some stalker!"

"Because that's exactly what you are!" she let out a giggle at their childish argument-they hadn't changed much over the years and she was thankful for that, allowing her to feel more comfortable around the boys-no _men. _She grabbed the tray piled with tea and cookies and walked out into the living room,

"Oh, don't tease him so much Loke," she scolded good-naturedly as she set the tray down in front of them, "anyway there's lots of cookies so eat up." True to her words there were a large amount of cookies piled onto a plate- past tense meaning there _were _a pile of cookies on a plate before they had disappeared in a mere minute. She raised a brow at them, "Hungry?" they all nodded and thanked her for the food before gulping down the tea she had made,

"So Erza," Midnight started, "I didn't know you played..." she turned her head to look in the direction she was pointing to see a black guitar in the corner of the room, she laughed,

"No," her hair swayed with the shake of her head as she denied his assumption. "Lucy does..." she smiled softly at the beautifully crafted guitar before looking back at them,

"Lucy?" Natsu asked and Erza stilled-completely forgetting that Natsu was not aware of everything along with most of the band members except for two, she gulped before reluctantly nodding.

"Yeah," she breath, avoiding his piercing gaze, "Lucy lives with me..."

"Why?"

"Natsu-" Jellal warned.

"Why is Lucy living with you Erza? What about Aunt Layla and Uncle Jude?" Her eyes narrowed slightly as the forbidden names came from his lips and she took a moment to remind herself that he was in the dark about everything that had happened over the four years he was absent before calmly replying,

"That is not for me to say, Natsu. Lucy will tell you when she feels it is most appropriate." silence once again filled the room and Gray shifted nervously at the sudden change in the atmosphere before turning his gaze to pictures hanging on the wall-most being of her and Lucy while there was one photo in particular that had caught his attention.

"Hey Erza?" she hummed and looked over at him as he nodded toward the picture, "Who's that?" instantly her head snapped over to the photo of her in a dress with a man next to her, his arm around her waist and from what they could tell-the photo had been a recent one. HIs eyes wondered toward the silent woman and something caught his eye on her hand, "Erza, are you...?"

"His names Simon," she interrupted him and Jellal's eyes widened-he recognized the man in the photo as one of his old friend from high school and tensed at the intimate position they were in as they smiled in the picture, "He's an old friend from high school," she explained as she stood up and gathered their empty dishes and he smiled slightly at that before she continued, "And he's also my Fiancé." Instantly, Jellal's world came crashing down on him at her words, cutting him like a knife. She was engaged. Engaged to one of his best friends. Engaged to a man she had never showed much interest in. A man other then him. The reality of it all hit him hard and he suddenly found it extremely hard to breath, he felt sick and could feel the growing sharp pain in his chest, remembering what she said.

_Fiancé_

_Fiancé_

_Fiancé_

"Jellal? You alright man?" he nodded numbly before quietly excusing himself to use the bathroom. Loke sighed, feeling a small amount of pity for the man, he had known about Jellal's feelings toward the scarlet haired woman and had encouraged him to take the next step with her, but this just proved that his encouragement was wasted.

He sighed and ran a hand through his ginger colored hair before speaking to Erza, "If Lucy lives here than how come she isn't here? She left before us and she has a motorcycle..." He heard Erza sigh before responding,

"She helps out a friend or two every so often and then she has a night job to do so she's not really home that often, and when she is she's normally out for most of the night..." she trailed off.

"Why?" his brows furrowed together, his worry for his cousin was increasing with each question and considering he knew next to nothing about what was going on with Lucy he felt even more worry.

"She hangs out with some... friends and she goes for jogs," he nodded silently-noting the pause in her sentence. He shrugged, maybe he just imagined it but even then he couldn't stop the growing feeling that everything he was being shown now was nothing but truth hidden by a lie.

* * *

**Chapter 5**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**She's struggling to feel anything. Anything that could let her know that she's human.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

* * *

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Well was that a big bomb for you there with the whole Erza and Jellal thing? How many of you thought that Erza's fiancé was Jell? Don't be shy~ You can admit it~ so how was it? I don't think it was terrible but feel free to state your opinion on the matter. Anybody confused on the last statement at the end of the chapter? Sorry if that confused you but it should make more sense later on so just be patient. As some of you may have noticed I deleted 'She Who Read's the Stars' honestly I was stuck on what to write next and wasn't really enjoying writing it anymore so sorry for any of you who followed or favorite that story but I will not put it up for adoption nor will it be continued. Anyways let us know what you thought of this chapter and give us any advice you can like grammar or wording things-I am still inexperienced ;D!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727; Finally! I've been waiting for Shattered-Nightmares712 to put that song in and she finally did! For any of you who wanted to know what the song was called its 'Loosing Grip by Avril Lavinge.' We're both big fans of her and you may notice some more songs will be used by her later in the story! As a small side not Shattered-Nightmares712 will be updating 'Lost in the Lie' next so watch for that! Let us know what you thought! Thank you for reading!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	6. Chapter 5: What he doesn't know kill's

**I'm awful aren't I?**

**I keep writing chapters for different stories then I say I am,**

**sorry ;(!**

**I've been listening to so much 'Marianas Trench' songs lately **

**While writing these chapters and let me say they are great,**

**Check them out if you're really curious**

**since I will be putting quite a bit of their songs in this FanFiction.**

**My favorite would have to be 'Truth or Dar' and 'Shake Tramp' **

**They're both really good.**

**Well anyway I really don't have **

**much to talk about so I'm going to go ahead**

**and let you guys read the story!**

**Enjoy**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Trying numbness instead of the Pain**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 5: What he doesn't know kill's**

**~QOoOQ~**

It had been a week since the band _'Catching Fire'_ had joined Fairy Tail high and a week since Lucy had made her statement to Natsu on their first day back in Magnolia. Every day he would try and coax her into speaking to him like they did before he left but any time she opened her mouth it was to say something rude to him then turn around and pretend he was never there, again. The nineteen year old had tried asking some of his friends but none of them seemed to give him the answer he was looking for, either saying they had no clue as to what was going on with Lucy or just giving him riddles that didn't make any sense to him.

He knew he had to think about it-being a rather delicate situation- and considering Lucy was involved in the situation he knew he had to be even more careful of how he approached it, she had always been so easily irritable and so if she found out that he was asking others as to what he did wrong, she was sure to kill him-quite literally. He sighed, he wasn't the only one who was having problems at the moment like Midnight, his father-Brain, an odd name they had all agreed for a child to be named- had gotten into some bad habits in the past few years and ended up in jail with a high bail to pay to get him out and although Midnight wanted nothing more than to do just that, his fathers crimes were far to great for even him to deal with.

Gray, his mother-Ur-was suffering from a disease they have yet to name where the person suffering from the illness starts to slowly freeze until their heart stops in which they see it as the worst case of hypothermia possible. The doctors Ur was taken to have yet to find a possible treatment or cure for the unknown illness she had and all the raven haired teen could do is silently pray to Mavis with his sister and brother-Lyon and Ultear Fullbuster- that their mother be able to survive it-whatever _'it'_ was.

Jellal-who was currently playing with a chain silently on the couch-, was suffering from a major heartbreak. Though his situation may not have been as severe as the others, Natsu imagined that it would hurt as much-he'd know-hearing that the woman he had been in love with since a young age had moved on and become engaged to another man-a man he had considered his best friend in high school, and one that he still considered to be now. Jellal hadn't spoken much since they had received the news from Erza Scarlet herself and he was still trying to figure out a way to act around her and Simon whilst hiding his still undying feelings for her.

Loke, his situation was similar to his own. The ginger only had a few members left in his family that he knew about-his father already having passed on around the age twelve and his mother dying while giving birth to him- he still had Lucy and her parents from what Natsu remembered and although he was able to get responses from the blonde she wasn't speaking to him like she usually would have back then. He was in no way alone being the flirt of the band did have its perks in that way but the salmon haired male knew better than to say Loke didn't miss his cousin dearly and wish that she would just tell him what was going on in her life now.

All of them were suffering from something whether it is from before or after their absence in the past four years, it still hurt all the same and Natsu knew that it would take a lot for them to heal from it but then again, scars were always visible. Onyx eyes roamed the room, trying to get his mind off all the depressing things and successfully distracted himself by playing with his father's lighter although, even staring into the burning flame didn't mean he had completely fled all depressing thoughts to the back of his mind.

"Oi, Pyro!" he glanced lazily to the side and met the eyes of his black haired friend, he watched him give a roll of his eyes before turning back to the picture in his hand, "Stop thinking about useless shit..." his blunt words took him back and he snapped the lid on the lighter before fully turning to him with a curious expression on his face.

"How do you know I'm thinking of dumb shit?" his defensive tone of voice caused Midnight to smirk at him before replying nonchalantly with a shrug of his shoulders,

"I can hear the sizzle from your brain fryin' form thinking so much," he received a snort in response and he let out a short chuckle, "Okay, okay, I can see the dumb expression on your face and you only get that way when your thinking of something shitty." Natsu raised a brow at his friend, surprised that he had actually remembered what his face looked like when he was thinking of something unpleasant but he was grateful nonetheless that his friend was able to help take his mind off things. He ran a hand through his hair,

"That's kind of creepy man..." he joked, gaining the attention of a certain blue-eyed male.

"Yeah," Gray agreed with a slight smirk on his lips, "You're almost as much of a pervert as Jellal," said man glared over in their direction after hearing the quiet chuckles, Raising his head in distaste he said,

"At least I don't go around grouping woman out in the open unlike a certain flirt we know," he reminded them, "That is sexual harassment and what a _real _pervert looks like."

"Hey," Loke pushed the glasses up further on the bridge of his nose, "It's not sexually harassment if the ladies _want _me to touch them, besides," he smirked, "I can't help if the ladies want me-" he snapped his fingers as if suddenly remembering something as he pointed to Jellal, "You didn't deny that you were a pervert, you said you don't grope woman out in the open like me-" he chuckled, "-does that mean you do it in the closet?" the group of men chuckled at Jellal's attempted insult being fired back at him.

"Oh please," he waved off, "I am way more civil than that," he dismissed their accusations as Midnight chirped in-having thought over the situation accordingly and said,

"Yes you may be more civilized-or at least that we know of- but, I did hear some strange noises coming from the bathroom earlier and when I went in there after it smelt but the best part-' he paused, adding a dramatic effect, "there was a picture of Erza beside the toilet..." A chorus of laughs were heard throughout the room as every decided to put their two-cents in,

"Wow Jellal! Didn't know you had it in 'ya!"

"You said you were civil!"

"Dude! That's disgusting! You did that in my bathroom!?"

"I AM NOT A PERVERT!"

**...**

Awhile after their little 'teasing Jellal party' in the living room, Natsu decided he would help his father with cooking considering there were more mouths to feed with the guys over. He could still remember helping his dad out after school in the restaurants kitchen-everyone who worked their knew who he was with his wild personality and unnaturally colored hair, he oddly missed helping his dead in the kitchen while he was away and now he was back to doing it again, only this time they were at home.

"I hope you haven't gotten too rusty over the years boy," his father grinned-one much like his- at him, spatula in hand. He returned the look and gave him a thumbs up,

"Nah, the guys made me cook them food most of the time when we were hungry otherwise someone did it for us or it was take out." he shrugged before rolling up his sleeves and walking over to Igneel to chop up the vegetables. A peaceful silence hung over them, the only sound being the knife cutting the vegetables and the guys watching TV in the living room.

"Oi! Don't change the show!"

"Nobody wants to watch a documentary about Katy Perri!"

"Loke turn that shit off!"

"Why? It is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen!"

"We are NOT watching porn!" Natsu's movements stilled at Gray's yell and he saw his father slowly growing a tick mark on the side of his head as he raised the spatula in a threatening way in his hand and walked into the living room, he could hear the guys beginning to panic as they saw his father walk in and he couldn't help the low chuckle rumbling in the back of his throat as he heard their conversation,

"What are you watching on my TV!?"

"Oh shit! He's got the spatula!"

"Remember last time!?"

"WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!"

"Now, now Mr. Dragneel. I was just simply educating these innocent men that women nee-GAH!"

Natsu shook his head at the gingers attempt to defend himself-with the obvious failure in convincing his father that he was in no way thinking anything inappropriate-which they all knew he was lying. Fucking pervert. Natsu glanced at his seething father who, surprisingly, had a calm expression on his face-he knew that the elder Dragneel was probably quite angry but immediately dismissed it when he sighed with a small smile on his face,

"You okay old man?"

"Yeah," he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Been awhile hasn't it?" The salmon haired male nodded grimly before turning back to his freshly chopped vegetables,

"Yeah," he paused, "I missed this. When the guys would come over and we'd all hang out with Luce too..." Igneel looked at his son from the corner of his eye and grimaced slightly, he knew his son was miserable with the ignorance his best friend was giving him and he also knew that he still harbored feelings for the blonde but she just wouldn't relent.

"Maybe it can be _like _that again someday..." he trailed off, trying to cheer his son up. Though contrary to his efforts, the males mood just seemed to depleted even more as he shook his head with a sigh,

"No, dad, I don't think so... Dad, I think she hates me."

"Oh?" he turned back to the stove and stirred what was in the pot, "What makes you say that son?" he questioned, feigning ignorance to his sons situation, he heard Natsu sigh,

"It's just she keeps hinting at things like I did something to hurt her-which I would never do- and she won't tell me what I did to make her feel that way..." a beat of silence took over them before Igneel spoke,

"Maybe son, you should think over anything you did while you were away?" Natsu's gazed snapped to meet his,

"Dad! Do you know some-?" he paused, his eyes landing on a rather large scar on his father's forearm-one that he had never noticed until now, "Dad? What's that from?" Igneel glanced down at his arm and shook his head,

"Nothing son, nothing"

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

After everyone had eaten, the guys decided it was about time that they left-insisting that they had overstayed their welcome-which indeed they had and so they all left- Loke included with a large bruise on his head with him winning all the way of how his beautiful self was ruined with the ugly purple mark on his head. Natsu slipped on his converse and opened the door before calling back,

"Old man! I'll be back later, just going out for a walk!" heard his father grunt from the living room as he continued to watch his soap operas, Natsu still couldn't believe his father was actually into things like that, the man he left four years ago was so strong and fearsome but now he seemed more like a masculine housewife that sobbed into the popcorn as her favorite male character died. What had his father succumbed to?

He sighed and decided that his destination would be a bar, now Natsu knew that getting drunk would not solve the problem-he knew that remembering how his father at some point had stooped to drinking so as to numb the pain of losing something in his life but he had realized that it was hurting his son and soon stopped. Though he knew all this he still wanted to have a drink at the bar he had heard so much about around town, apparently a knew bar had opened up a little while after he and the guys left for the tour the name being 'Alberona's Bar'. From what Natsu had deducted the bar had great service and reasonably priced drinks with great entertainment, and hearing this, he just had to see for himself.

Soon he found himself in front of the building and walked down the stairs to the night bar part of the building, the upper part being his father's restaurant surprisingly enough, though his reason for this was the shock of knowing his father actually _allowed _them to put a bar in the basement of his restaurant, but he shrugged, he supposed that it would bring in more customers. He shook his head and walked down the stairs before opening the door and instantly he was hit with the smell of alcohol, the unbearable heat and the sound of music.

He walked in further, ignoring the catcalls he received from some of the drunken woman in the area surrounding him; he walked up to the nearly empty bar and sat on a stool, the place looked nice and well-kept though he was thankful that no one had paid any attention to him, he liked to be able to walk around without all the extra eyes following him.

"Can I get a beer?" he asked the woman currently sipping on a bottle of whiskey-his only way of knowing she was actually a waitress being her nametag on her shirt. The brunette looked down at him with slightly glossy eyes, her chest exposed quite a bit with the only thing covering her breasts being the turquoise bathing suit top matching her light brown Capri shorts and sandals. She placed the glass on the bar, the smell of whiskey immediately flooding his nostrils,

"Yeah, sure-" she blinked rapidly at him and he sighed inwardly, thinking that she was a fan and had recognized him but her next words erased all thoughts of her being a fan, "Oh-shit, Natsu?" she asked.

"Um, Yeah?" he took a better look at her before glancing at her name tag 'Cana', where had he-_Oh Cana,_ his eyes widened in realization, "Cana?" he watched her grin with the bottle of whiskey back in her hand,

"The one and only sweet cheeks~" he chuckled at her behavior before taking a sip of his own beer that she had grabbed from under the bar, "So I see you've become pretty famous lately, eh?" he grinned and nodded,

"I told you I would someday," he paused before grinning wider, "Pay up!" he held his hand out flat as she grumbled and dug through her pocket before handing him twenty dollars,

"I can't believe you remembered that..."

"Of course I did," he chuckled, "I was a sixteen year old with no money-I wanted that twenty bucks so bad!" Cana chuckled lightly at his confession and took another swig of her drink, he briefly wondered how many drink she had so far considering she had a little bit of a sway to her movements but he refrained from asking and quietly listened to the music in the background.

"Can't believe you're back..." she mumbled,

"Yeah..." he nodded, "I can't either,"

"Natsu?" he heard a voice speak from behind him to see his scarlet haired childhood friend and a tall male beside her, 'What are you doing here?" Cana pulled the drink back from her lips and waved her arm at her,

"Hey, Er-Chan~"

"Cana," she said looking at the brunette, "you're drunk..."

"Nah, Erza baby, I ain't drunk, never have and never will beh~!" as if to prove her point she took another drink and walked away to serve a customer, stumbling a little along the way. Natsu heard the scarlet haired woman sigh before sitting in front of him with the man previously mentioned standing beside her,

"So Erza," he started. "You 'gonna introduce me?"

"Oh yeah," she said before introducing them, "Natsu this is Simon, my fiancé, he is a policeman- or will be. Simon this is-"

"Natsu Dragneel, the lead singer of the band _'Catching Fire'_," he interrupted his fiancé and held out a hand to the younger male, "I've heard a lot about you from Jellal, you guys sound pretty amazing..." Natsu looked at the hand extended to him before calmly shaking it and examining him, from looking at him Natsu could tell the man was well built and strong form the grip he had on his hand, he had messy brown hair and charcoal black eyes, similar to his onyx ones, one of his eyes was covered with a patch which he assumed he got from an accident, though he looked to be gentle the salmon haired man knew better then to just dismiss the man capability's-especially since he was about to marry _Erza _of all people.

"Thanks, it's nice to meet the man that puts up with the monster," immediately he regretted the words as he received a hard slap to the back of the head and a laugh from Simon.

"Ah, I put up with her 'cuz I love her..." he stated while wrapping an arm around her shoulders and bending down to kiss the top of her head. Natsu grimaced at the scene before he was distracted by the sudden change in music he realized that he recognized this voice, no-he _knew _this voice.

"Lucy..." he mumbled catching Erza's attention, she glanced over at the blonde on stage and smiled slightly at the look she held on her face,

"Oh, yeah.." she hummed, "Lucy works here-she also works at your dads restaurant after school..." though he heard her words he showed no indication that he cared and just stared at Lucy singing on stage. He noticed that the girl earlier deemed Juvia was the bassist while the smaller bluenette earlier seen at school the week before was on the keyboard, Gajeel-someone who Natsu was not too fond of for reasons unknown- was on drums and a girl with-what he thought- was a large bust and long, wavy, light brown locks on lead guitar.

Lucy-who was also playing guitar-, was singing the same song she had the day they enrolled into Fairy Tail High, though this time there seemed to be a lot more intensity with every note she hit, he blonde locks swayed with every movement she made. She wore black ripped skinny jeans, a red tank top with a dark-denim vest and black converse sneakers, her piercings and tattoos evident on her glistening skin. The more he stared at her the more he found that she seemed to glow, she seemed happy being up on stage and singing with her band but what surprised him the most was the pain he could see in her eyes as she sung.

"I'm gonna take a piss..." Simon told them before leaving Erza and him to silently listen to their best friends beautiful singing voice, watching her sway around on stage.

**"Everything wasn't ok,****  
****I was left to cry there, waiting outside there****  
****grinning with a lost stare.****  
****That's when I decided.****  
****Why should I care?-"**

"Why does she look so hurt?" he asked sadly, he hated seeing Lucy with the look of anger and sadness in her face- something he had seen often now, something he never would have seen before he left. He couldn't help but blame himself for the way she was now but then again he didn't know what he did in the first place so he had nowhere to stand from.

**"-Cuz you weren't there when I was scared,****  
****I was so alone.****  
****You, you need to listen, im starting to trip,****  
****I'm loosing grip,****  
****and I'm in this thing alone."**

"Lucy?" Erza asked curiously, looking back at Natsu to meet his gaze, she felt her heart twist at the saddened look her friend had on his face and if only he knew, if only he knew the truth- it would kill him.

"Yeah, I keep asking but everybody just keeps giving me these riddles, I just wanna know why she's so broken..." his voice was desperate and he seemed like he was on the brink of madness trying to figure out what he had done to push Lucy over the edge, some things were beyond their control but what he did-he could have stopped it and maybe the blonde would have stayed the same. Erza glanced back at him, really she guessed he was blaming himself since he was not a part of her life for so long although the male had other ways of interaction but him going on tour was only a small fraction of why she was like this.

Lucy had been sad over his absence but she had gotten over that after a month or so and started to move on but things happened and-. She sighed and took a sip of her drink, a heavy silence falling over them.

"...She's broken because she believed."

* * *

**Chapter 6**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**What's worse than being broken?**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Hey guys! Another chapter here for you! Hopefully the next story I update will be a different one but it depends on if I am able to actually get the words down. At the moment I'm a little stuck but I should get over it soon so if I update another story really soon and it sucks then it's probably because I really wanted to update but couldn't really make it my best. So I am apologizing in advance. Thanks for reading guys and let us know what you thought!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: Well some of you may not be happy if you read some of Shattered-Nightmare712's other stories since she updated this again but remember some of her stories may take awhile since she had re-written about two and the third is still being set out with the plot line but this one I have been helping her on it so it's a little easier! Anyway hopefully you guys enjoyed the chapter and I heard some of you are upset at the lack of Jerza so I hope you're not too mad! Thanks for reading!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	7. Chapter 6: Bound to Him, Bound to Her

**Hey!**

**So how are you guys?**

**I started this new anime which I have no idea what it is called,**

**but it is awesome,**

**So I just got back from track and field a little while ago**

**and I did pretty good in high jump, I placed!**

**But anyway me and my friends went down to Tim Horton's**

**for lunch and it was pretty crowded but there was this old woman who kept looking over at us**

**and glaring! But we were silent and if we spoke, it was nothing offensive!**

**She freaked me out O.O**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Wake me from this nightmare**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 6: Bound to him, Bound to Her**

**~QOoOQ~**

The blonde sighed as she ran around town, she still couldn't sit still, ever since Natsu and the guys came back she's been on edge, nothing could clam her down except for when she would sing with her friends but even then she still had the idiot on her mind. She let out a long sigh and sighed before checking the time, it was already eleven at night, she been out there for more than an hour now and her stomach was begging for it to be filled but she continued to ignore it and shoved her hands in her pockets.

Maybe she should just sit down for awhile, she could calm down a bit, thinking that taking a rest was for the best, Lucy walked over to the nearby park she played in when she was a child and sat on the swings. Everything was so damn screwed up, though her life had been like that for a long time now but Natsu being there just created an even bigger mess than everything already was. She leaned back and stared up at the shinning stars in the sky, she still remembered the stories her mother would tell her of the stars each night before she went to sleep, though they weren't accurate she still loved the imagination her mother held involving the stars.

One story in particular she loved about Leo the Lion, Aries and Orion. Originally in the story Leo wished to eat Aries for his dinner and he knew he would be able to trick her since they had know each other for awhile, his sudden urge to have her as his meal could not be explained himself but he soon found that it would be futile to try for the ram had been captured by the hunter, Orion. The lion, having been informed about the situation, suddenly became angry and seeked revenge on the hunter, so for months he searched for her until one day during march eh he was able to catch a sign of her near him in the West.

He ran and did not stop until he could see the two figures he had been hunting for so long, Orion standing in front of Aries with his hunting dogs, Canis major and minor, by his side barring their teeth at the ram. It was then that Leo realized that what he had been feeling was not a hunger nor urge to eat Aries it was that urge to protect her and the hunger for her love that drove him mad. He let out a ferocious roar and charged at Orion, taking on his guard dogs and himself all the while trying to protect her from what fate has deemed her death and he fought, against time, fate and death all for the sake of love. What came next was what always upset Lucy, in the last seconds before daybreak, Orion managed to wield his bow and shoot an arrow at the unsuspecting Lion, taking his life as the colors of the sun bathed him and his love, Aries in light.

She sighed, she always loved that story, no matter how much she hated the outcome she still could not help herself from asking her mother to repeat it over and over every week.

"Lucy?" her head snapped in the direction of the voice finally realizing that there was someone standing in front of her, soaked to the bone as she was, "Luce you alright?" she growled at the nickname, finally realizing who it was who had called out to her and knowing this she turned her head away defiantly, ignoring the concerns of the salmon haired male. "Luce? What's wrong?"

"Don't worry..." she snapped, standing up from her position on the swing and pulling her soaked hood over her head. "You have no need to worry about me anymore! I can't trust you enough to do even that..." shock came to him fast and he couldn't express the anger he held within him, she had been rude to him ever since they had gotten here and though he cared for Lucy, she still denied him any right of being there for her and the reason was still unknown to him. Finally, he snapped,

"I still fucking worry over you and I make mistakes but you do too!" he yelled, no longer able to restrain the worried anger he kept within himself. Why couldn't she just let him be there? Tell him what he did? Nothing she was saying to him made any sense! "So don't tell me you can't trust me because nobody is perfect Lucy,"

"You don't think I know that Natsu!? You don't think I already know how fucking messed up the world is!? How my life is!? I know all of this fucking bullshit but you know what? I never did anything to break someone's trust in me, I never tried to shove my trust down someone's throat after they had already refused to swallow!" she bellowed. He was doing exactly what she was saying he was, he was trying to get her to trust him again, trying to rebuild their friendship, trying to keep a grasp on what little connection they had left but he still had yet to find the reason for her anger and pain, "Don't worry when I fight with you Natsu," she chuckled and turning on her heel, fed up with his half assed argument, "Worry when I stop because it means there's nothing left for us to fight for..." he grabbed her wrist and looked her in the eye, his anger no longer present but she could still decipher the fire in his eyes, that fighting spirit she had missed for so long,

"But there is," his eyes softened along with his tone as he spoke to her. "There always is a reason..." she glared at him and harshly retracted her wrist from his grasp and walked away, never once speaking a word, never looking back to see the broken expression on his face.

**...**

_'What the fuck was that!?' _Lucy fumed, it had been a few hours since her little interaction with Natsu and she was still fuming from their argument, she sighed and leaned her head against the shower wall, allowing the hot water to run down her back. There were so many things she just wanted to forget but they kept their grip on her, refusing to allow her that sanctuary, things would be so much easier, less painful if everything that reminded her of those times would dissapear. _But you would miss them _a voice would always hold her back _you would regret it _she would stop her mind from running wild but she couldn't numb the dull ache in her chest when she thought of him.

They were so close, so what happened? She knew what happened yet he didn't seem to recall anything that would have set her off, she laughed, how convenient for him to have forgotten pain meanwhile she was here and struggled to forget everything. She was here to take all by herself. Her heart thudded painfully in her chest as she grit her teeth, not willing for the tears to spill down her face, she punched the wall over and over, ignoring the thick red substance running down her knuckles as she repeated the action. "Why!? Why!? WHY!?" she cried out in despair, she slammed her fists into the wall before slowly sliding down the side of the tiled wall, "Why can't I forget you!?"

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

"Lucy?" she heard her music teacher call, "Are you even listening?" she popped and ear-bud out and gave him a bored stare to which he sighed and shook his head, "then you weren't," he concluded. "We will be starting a new project where you each will have to create your own songs-" she rolled her eyes, hadn't they already done this?" she already had tons of songs she could use that were her own so she really didn't need to do anything. "-but this time you will be doing a duet with a student of my choice." _'Well shit.'_ she popped the other ear-bud out and uncrossed her legs off the top of the desk, "here is the pairings."

"Juvia Lockser and Gray Fullbuster," she turned her head at the mention of her friends names being called and saw her raven haired childhood friend looking at the rain-woman-a nickname she had acquired after being spotted twirling in the rain- with the smallest hint fear in his eyes as the woman in question was crying out her preaches involving Gray. Lucy laughed as she watched them and shook her head, poor Gray.

"Macbeth Dark and Loke Celeste," There wasn't much of an reaction involving the two, they nodded and began to discuss their plans for their duet, the blonde groaned, they just bored her, the best part about getting these kinds of assignments was being able to see the dread in peoples faces once their told who their partner is. She found it especially entertaining when that odd pair had a intimate relationship before breaking up and everything is awkward when they're paired together.

"Levy McGarden and Gajeel Redfox." Lucy smirked when she saw her petite friend blush and sighed as her bulky best friend shrugged his shoulders before leaning back in his chair and closing his eyes.

"Natsu Dragneel and Lucy."

Karma is a bitch. Her mind went blank and she was no longer listening to Gildart's list of partner, all she could think of is how much life seemed to like screwing with her. If she was making a song with the devil himself than she would have to actually tell him what the song would be about, but then again she could go about it a different way but she doubted the idiot would go for it.

Lucy glanced at her bookworm best friend, who was looking at her with a concerned stare, she needed to talk to her later and pointed up to which the bluenette understood and nodded before turning back and listening for her name to be called. The blonde furiously started to scribble down some ideas of what they could sing but as she continued to read over every idea she noticed nothing was really _her _she couldn't sing anything remotely related to what Natsu would probably want them to. She sighed and dropped her pencil, this was going to be harder than she originally planned.

"You all have one month to complete this, and I expect it to be done on time Gajeel," he looked pointedly at the pierced male who just grunted in reply, "You can have the rest of the period to start your work. Begin."

Lucy sighed and laid her head on her desk, she could hear the low chatter through her headphones and -regrettably- footsteps approaching as the song ended. She heard the god awful noise of the chair srapeing across the floor as he sat across form her, a beat of silence passing over them as the noise level in the background stayed at a minimum. "So what do you want to start with? The melody? Lyrics?"

"How about You make your own lyrics, I make mine and then smash 'em together before starting the music." she stated more than questioned as he furrowed his brow in frustration and watched her scribble down more words on her paper. Her way of handling their partnership was odd and although it could be proven interesting eh wanted to be there with her to write a song together and sing it like they had always wanted to. She was finally becoming a singer and Natsu had to admit, she sounded great and could possibly make a career out of her musical talent as he and the guys had but there was one problem, he barely knew this new Lucy and wasn't sure if she even wanted to be in the music industry.

He shook his head, she must have if she was singing in the bar bellow his fathers restaurant, she seemed to really enjoy being up on stage, pouring her heart into her music as she performed, in that way, she and him were extremely similar. His heart thudded in his chest as he leaned over her shoulder so his front was pressed up directly onto her back but she continued to ignore him and jotted down more phrases in her book. He still missed her, the way she would tell him that he was her best friend, the way she would smile and look at him with genuine happiness and the way she would hold him close, as if to say she would never let go, but at the moment-she didn't seem to think that anymore.

Lucy could feel him, she felt him when he pressed himself up against her back and felt his hot breath fanning the back of her neck in a rhythmic way, how long had it been since they were this close? Nothing had changed about him, how he would always casually move closer to her, his unnatural body heat that she had always loved to snuggle up to, his calloused hands-nothing. Though-she was a different story. Lucy had always been modestly covered before he left, she had been quiet, shy, so care-free and now look at her-she was like dirt under a shoe. She was tainted, broken, fake,, guarded, passive and not very modest, though the new her just had to be accepted, the new her resembled how she was trapped.

She felt him rest his head on her shoulder but ignored him, she couldn't give him a reaction like he wanted, again he moved his head and buried it in her hair as his arms snaked around her waist. She remembered him doing this all those years ago, she would always find comfort in the warmth he provided and security in his surprisingly muscular arms but now she could feel her stomach twisting into a knot as her inner voice screamed at him to release her, to leave her, to forget her but something told her to stop. To keep holding onto something and wait, be patient but she couldn't wait forever could she?

"Natsu," her pencil stilled as he hummed into her neck and Lucy had to refrain from screaming out whether it be in agony or longing. "Please let me go." By no she was gripping the desk on either side of her as she felt her partners rhythmic breathing turn frantic, he was panicking and she knew that he wanted to protest but she really needed him to give her some space, she needed to breath. "Natsu," he squeezed her tighter,

"Why...?" he breathed onto her neck, and finally she gave him an reaction as he continued-not caring who was watching them. "Why can't I hold you like I used to?" his voice sounded so innocent as if he were asking some simple question that anyone could answer for him, "Why can't it be like we used to?" he secretly kissed her neck, feeling her still beneath him but he refrained from frowning and continued. "I can hold you again." He insisted, whispering in her ear as if it were some big secret, "We could go back to the way we used to be-" he felt her muscles tighten. She was more tense than he would have liked and Natsu swore that if he weren't holding her so tightly she would have already bolted out of the room. "-We could be what we had promised to be..."

Her breathing went ragged as he continuously whispered things in her ear-things she would have died to hear come from his lips as he held her like he was but she couldn't, she tensed and swore as the last few words came out of his mouth. The amount of sincerity in his voice was unbelievable and it took her everything in her being to not give in-she couldn't believe there was still a small part of her attached to him. Her heart rate quickened as memories flashed in her mind, again she was being reminded of things she had wanted to forget but every single moment she spent with him the more her past was dug up.

"We can't." She rasped, her voice barely above a whisper as he stilled. "Natsu," she called out as she felt him shake, Lucy would do anything just to get out of this and leave but she knew that's he had to remain calm in this situation. She glanced around the room, thankfully only one person had noticed their little interaction and she sighed in relief as Levy gave her a concerned look before returning to her work reluctantly, "things aren't the same anymore." she wrapped her slender fingers around his wrist as their grip continued to tightened and removed them from her side. Lucy knew he was staring at her with hi usual confused look on his face but she decided to only give him the same response, "things can't be like they were before. There's nothing left here."

"Luce..." he whispered, shock evident on his face, no matter what she said to him he couldn't stay away, he just kept bouncing back, he needed her and he needed to know why she was being like this. What was the blonde talking about? All of this could be over if she would just tell him why she was so angry at him, her response, everything she had been doing earlier gave him even the smallest bit of hope for them but it was immediately crushed as she pushed him away again. "Why can't we go back tot he way things were?" he was desperate. He wanted to touch her, to hold her, to be close to her, just _speak _to her but she continued to resist and took all his willpower not to hold her at that moment. He heard the bell signaling the end of the day and watched as his childhood friend packed her bag quickly before standing up, she turned on her heel and walked toward the door, leaving him with few words as she bolted out the door.

"We just can't Natsu," he heard her whisper and this time, he was sure, he could hear her voice wavering. "We can't go back. _I _can't... not after all that."

Natsu chased after Lucy as she briskly walked to the back of the school where her motorcycle was parked, she could hear him calling her name and blocked out the feeling she got every time his voice reached her ears, she couldn't feel, she couldn't do it anymore. Memories flashed through her mind as she quickened her pace to where she was almost at a full sprint, shaking her head as she did. She didn't want to remember but every time he spoke to her, looked at her, _touched _her it would bring back everything she had blocked out.

"Lucy what did I do!? What happened those four years I was gone!?"

"Cut's, scars, bruises, lies, fake laughs, fake smiles, constant cries and a horrifying past." his eyes widened at her words. What was she talking about? He glanced at her and somehow only _now _had he noticed a few scars that littered the blondes body, though not horrible to the eye he still couldn't bare to look at them, something that ruined his beautiful blondes skin. "Promises broken, lost loves and the trust me that didn't last"

He didn't want to continue this, any of this, he just wanted the old Lucy back but the hot blood in him took over and his anger spiked as he glared at her. "People come and go Lucy! That's life. Stop holding onto situations that have let you go!" He watched her flinch and for a split second he could have sworn that there was an emotion-dare he say hurt- in her eyes before she glared back and shoved her hands in her pockets.

"That's the fucking problem Natsu! They haven't let go, they still have that grasp on me that I can never shake off! They are still with me in the present, haunting me everyday and night! You know what I asked?" she clutched her beer and finally he could see a piece of her mask cracking off-his earlier resolve to end their argument coming back quickly as she spoke, "I asked Mavis to protect me from my enemies and I started losing everybody in my life that I actually gave a fuck about!" she revved up her engine before speeding off down the road.

"Natsu? You alright?" The salmon haired student turned around to see his childhood friends best friend and sighed before sliding down the building wall, running a hand through his hair as he did,

"Yeah... I'm fine but Lucy," he shook his head and cradled it in his hands, "I just want to know what the hell is going on and what happened to her," he heard the small bluenette heave a soft sigh before patting his shoulder. A breeze passed as the moment of silence continued before she finally spoke.

"It's the same old story you've heard a thousand times." She paused, looking out into the sky. "Somebody's trust gets broken and somebody's left behind for the evil to find..."

* * *

**Chapter 7**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Some things are better kept at a distance**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

* * *

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Hey guys! S I have updated most of my stories so far and I just decided to update this one and so here it is! I have been completely swamped with homework and projects lately and now exams are coming up again so I think after another round of updates I may stop for awhile so I can study and try not to fail them. Stroke-of-Midnight has them on the same days as I do so she can't really do anything either but they aren't until June so that shouldn't be for awhile.****  
****Love you guys!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: Another chapter! I can't wait for summer to start then there will be more updates! It is really hot here now and my hair is frizzing! It's really annoying, but that has nothing to do with the story so I'm gonna shut up. How are you guys? Are you enjoying the story so far? I am currently on a class trip really far away from home and will be back on Monday so Shattered-Nightmares712 is keeping me updated on how everything is going on at home and with our story! We're just getting into the story so you will have to wait for everything to start up!****  
****Thanks for reading Minna! See ya next time!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	8. Chapter 7: One Last Time

**So here is another update!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727 is back from her trip,**

**more detail about that will be provided after the story but**

**how are you guys?**

**This is a bit of a filler at the beginning**

**because I just had no clue what to add in so yeah I came up with **

**that. Just to let you know the line breaker will**

**only be used when starting, ending the story or when a new day in the story has begun.**

**You will see some of those in later chapters**

**and that is why I am letting you know this so you don't ask me why I don't use one in every chapter.**

**Enjoy**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Her silence was just another word for her pain**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 7: One Last Time**

**~QOoOQ~**

Blonde hair was flipped over a thin shoulder as she continued to help her best friend out at his and his father's shop, something she had been doing every Friday for the past three years. She enjoyed doing it but today, she just really wasn't putting any effort into, still diluted by the other days argument with her previous childhood best friend. Lately she had noticed that he was spending time-if not with her- around her much more often than when he first arrived, she noticed that he had been visiting the bar she worked at frequently and spoke to Cana on several occasions but proceeded to feign ignorance to his presence and calm herself down. She knew that he wasn't there by coincidence, especially since he was only there the nights she was performing.

It angered her that he was going against her wishes of him being near her at all and yet she found her anger slowly cooling the more he was wrong and it irked her. He was changing her and he hadn't even been back for more than a month, _'probably not for much longer either,' _she had thought bitterly. Lucy was doing the one thing that she had tried not to, to get too attached to anyone who might do the same thing he did and yet, here she was, recovering dead feelings from her past for the exact person that had let them wither in the first place.

It still surprised her how he had not clued in onto why she was angry yet, there were so many things that pointed out the obvious and yet he was still oblivious to all of it. She felt ridiculous for dwelling on such thoughts but this was her after all, she tended to dwell on unwanted things and no matter how much she willed them away they stayed and taunted her until the brink of destruction. She could still remember several occasions where she had broken down from the pent up feelings she hid from everybody and even to this day she was ashamed of sobbing so carelessly in front of her best friend but then again why should she?

Gajeel had been one of the very few people that had stayed after her little 'change', in fact he welcomed it with open arms and she couldn't help but smile at the thought of what a great friend the asshole was, though calling him that may have not been the best way to tell him they still laughed at it after it had been spoken. "Bunny? What're 'ya thinkin'?" she heard the unmistakable voice of her pierced friend and turned her head slightly as she cranked the wrench in her hands, "the faces you're makin' are great entertainment but the customers are starting to stare~" she wiped the sweat from her brow and playfully punched him in the chest as his laughter grew, "Gihi! Nice unibrow bunny! It looks like a black worm decided to make a bed between your eyebrows" she glared at him before looking at one of the nearby cars shinny hood to see she did indeed, have a unibrow though the middle being a much darker and greasier looking line than her familiar thin, blonde ones.

"What are you talkin' about Gaj? I look sexy with this unibrow~!" she grinned and rolled her eyes sarcastically as she walked back over to the car she was helping him fix before he interrupted her work. "How much more time we got?" she waited patiently, the only noise being the clinking of tools and their rhythmic breathing as she waited for his response,

"...Enough," she nodded and continued to tinker with the car. Silence took over them once again as they began focusing on their tasks, although Gajeel had been eyeing his blonde friend the whole time, she had been oddly silent today, more so than most days but to him it seemed like something was really bothering her and he could only guess what it was. "You alright bunny?" he didn't receive a response immediately after his question which had increased his worry as she stopped her movements briefly and nodded.

"..I'm fine Gajeel, just, tired." she sighed and rested her head against the hood of the car. She listened to the small noises of his clothes ruffling as he sat up, feeling the eyes watching her she sighed again, "What Metal Fuck?"

"..." He just continued to stare at her for a few moments making Lucy squirm a bit under the intensity of his eyes, she hated when people were like this, it felt like they were judging her and although she knew he wasn't she couldn't help but let a few thoughts slip through her mind. "It's about Salamander isn't it?" she turned her head away from his so as not to give away the answer but even though she had avoided looking at him her silence was all he needed to confirm it, "Bunny, you know you can talk to me-"

"I know, I know Gaj." she rubbed her temples with a scowl on her face before looking up at the ominous sky, "I should probably go," she shrugged on her leather jacket as she continued, "Erza's probably home cooking dinner and it looks like we're going to get a storm tonight." Gajeel sighed as he watched his best friend hop on her motorcycle, wave to him, before speeding up. Though she had been right about the darkening sky above them, he couldn't help but notice how quickly she had avoided the subject he had attempted to bring up.

He knew she was hurting, she didn't need to say it for him to know, she was always like that, silently enduring the pain, taking whatever was thrown at her without even trying explain her reasons for taking it. That was just what she did, she bottled everything up until it couldn't be held in anymore and she shattered, he could understand why she was feel everything she was, she still wasn't over everything, hell he doubted even he could take all the shit she had without even fucking hating the world. Yet, here she was, tough as nail, tougher than he ever could be and he wasn't even ashamed to admit it, because he knew that someone like Lucy didn't deserve half the shit she had received.

Nobody has seen through her mask, nobody's broken down her walls, only her closest friends could see through it, him included, but he could see she was changing, slowly Natsu had been changing her, whether it was good or bad, he had no clue but he did know that either way there was going to be more tears shed than there ever has before. He sighed and cradled his aching head in his hands, he personally, didn't care about anybody that had just recently come back to Magnolia, all he cared about was Lucy and how she was dealing with everything.

He could tell the emotional pressure was weighing on her, anybody who wasn't a fool could see that there was something off about her but most may not notice since she had always acted so passive around them and though he hated it, she would block them out if she really didn't want to talk about something, the same as she had done to him now. She told him she was fine, when she obviously wasn't, he could see the bags under her eyes, he could see how thin she was becoming in just under a month and he could tell how much pressure was being put on her with Natsu always hanging around her trying to patch things up when he didn't even know where the wholes began.

He was beyond pissed at the idiot for not realizing what was going on and he wanted to confront him on the matter but he knew this wasn't his fight to battle, it was Lucy's and no matter how he wanted to intervene he knew he couldn't, she would never forgive him for it and to hell he was gonna let that happen. He still felt like shit, no matter how many times he punched the wall, how much time he spent around Lucy, he still felt like fucking shit for not being able to help his best friend when he knew she really needed it. '_Some best friend I am' _he snorted and walked inside the shop as the rain began to pour. _'Can't even do a fucking thing for Bunny-girl even though I know she needs help,' _and although he thought this he knew it wasn't entirely his fault.

Once, he remembered hearing Lucy mumble in her sleep while at his place on the couch about how he lied to her, he knew exactly why she was mad at the idiot but he wanted to help her forget it. He groaned, how fucking sappy was he getting? He blamed it on his blonde friend for turning him soft, he used to be the most feared guy in school but now he was turning soft over a _bunny. _Maybe he was the fool? He couldn't even admit to things that he knew were existent in his life and even _Salamader _of all people had admitted to it. Why couldn't he?

Because he was an idiot for even thinking of stuff like that when Lucy was suffering alone, he was frustrated and mad at himself, Lucy-for not letting him help her when he knew she needed it, Natsu-for not realizing the situation was even more grave than what he thought. The blonde was broken and he somehow had gotten a couple scratched pieces back into place but they were still very delicate and each day that passed more and more pieces were falling and it was killing her. It was killing her friends around her, it was killing the man who had created a majority of this mess-

-And it was killing him.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

Erza had always been a relatively shy person, not keen on public displays of affection, and although she loved to perform, she would always somehow find an inability to recite the words she practiced. Despite her will to perform eventually she had given up on the dream of being in musicals or drama's and chosen a different career for her future, she still kept acting close in her heart, but she knew what she could and could not do and acting was just when of those _could not's_. Jellal had been the one to set her straight, he told her to follow her heart and only set herself one what it desired even if it were acting, if her heart was to want it enough for a career than that's what she would do but at that moment, she had been lost on what she wanted.

She sought comfort from him and found it in his arms as he hugged her tight and soothed her worries, she had been so naïve back then, wanting to do something so preposterous and yet rewarding and dangerous at the same time. Even now she couldn't help but feel some of her old naïve self in her, still looking at the world as if it were some beautiful creation by Mavis, and although it was, it was also the creation of a dungeon from Zeref. She had realized that and yet she continuously denied it. Why? Because that all she could do was deny.

Deny that what happened to her parents did, deny that there were horrible people living amongst them every day and yet they were oblivious to it. Deny everything, but, she ended up pursuing the denial for years and years to come, even after she had entered high school with her best friend, she denied and denied and denied. Only when she remembered what her father did they denial stop, _'Remember Erza,' _he had started, _'everybody has a little bit of magic in them whether it be used for good or for evil it's always in you. That's why daddy fights against people with the dark magic, to help, but even then it's still there Erza.' _she had continuously asked him why he would do something so foolish when really, she was the one being a fool but all he would tell her was, _'you have the potential to change that Erza, but you can't keep hiding from the magic forever, one day you will need to enforce and strengthen it, only then will you understand why your daddy does what he does.' _

For once she stopped denying and everything had hit her all at once, the memories of her father's last words about 'magic' before burning along with her mother and Jellal's parents in their homes, bad things happening around her, heartache and betrayal, reasons as to why she suddenly remembered her father's last words were unknown to her but she knew that she needed to pursue her magic rather than the denial. For years she did everything she could think of that would help her, with the support of Jellal, she had finally reached her final year at high school and final step to figuring out what her father had meant.

It wasn't until she had seen a girl from her class getting teased by a bunch of football jocks that she finally realized what he had meant, he meant for her to become stronger and follow the path that he had, to enforce the law, keep people safe, her family and prevent those with evil 'magic' from hurting the ones with good, that was what he had wanted her to do. Though she was sure he would have accepted anything she had chosen for her life-long path as long as she was aware of what the world was really like. That was the day Erza Scarlet had decided to follow in the footsteps of her deceased father and enforce the law.

That day she went to tell Jellal of her discovery but quickly silenced her words after hearing that he would be away from her for a long time. It struck her hard, harder than most would think. The one person she had been through everything with, the person she had relied on through the years, the person she had developed strong feelings for, was leaving her like her family had and she broke at the thought. She had loved, dearly but she had no courage whatsoever to say a thing to him-like Lucy had- as she waved and watched him and his band-mates drive away on their tour bus where they would be living for the next four years.

She had cried for days after his departure and she was sure she was not the only one but, she di not let that fog her mind, she immersed herself in her school work, University entry exams, and her studies, never had she felt more determined then always thinking she would make him proud the day he came back as he did her. She celebrated with her friends after being accepted into the Law enforcement Magnolia university, once of the best in Fiore and once again set her goal of become one of the elites.

Her surprise and joy did not fall short though when she was reunited with an old friend, Simon Mikazuchi. She had learned that he was in his second last year of University and was training to become an elite detective, like she was. They began to talk and re-familiarize themselves with each other after being separated for so many years, seeing as she had never seen him around high school. At some point that she still could not remember to this day the dull heartache she had felt each day after Jellal's departure had diminished as Erza spent more time with Simon. Before long, they had started dating as the pursued their careers together, she was finally happy, she had the man she loved and was working towards her dream alongside him.

Although her happiness could not be compared to the day that he had proposed to her in the most romantic way she could even imagine that even to this day she would still blush at the memory. Erza stared down at the shinning diamond ring on her left hand and smiled with a light blush visible on her face, she loved Simon so much and to think she was to marry the man in a few months it made her extremely happy. She was almost ready to graduate by the end of the year and couldn't wait to start her first job as a police officer rising her way up to an elite detective, it all seemed surreal.

She sighed and glanced at the watched hanging from her wrist, she still had time to finish her shopping and prepare dinner before Lucy would come home from helping Gajeel at his family's auto shop. She quickly skimmed over the uncrossed words on her grocery list and dropped each item in her basket after finding them before walking to the checkout area. She smiled at the clerk and politely responded to her questions as she scanned the items and passed them to her partner to bag them.

Erza wasn't one for socializing around strangers but if she were to become a detective she would have to get used to it and so she endured the pleasant yet uncomfortable conversation before taking her bags and leaving the store, doing some window shopping as she walked down the abandoned streets. Somehow there were very few cars and civilians on the streets but decided not to pay it any mind and continued to look through the windows of shops at the items on display. Slowly she came to a stop in front of a bridal shop, she still couldn't believe she was going to get married to the man she loved and yet seeing the dress in front of her made it feel all the more real somehow.

Again checking the time as she passed the store after her brief daydream, she noticed it was around the time that Lucy would start coming home and mentally scolded herself for dawdling so much that dinner would be delayed. She still remembered when Lucy had told her she would be moving out as soon as she reached the amount of money needed to buy her apartment so the two newlyweds could be alone together and even after insisting that she would to be in the way it came to a decision that the blonde would move out when she had the money to do so.

She sighed and ignored the quiet footsteps approaching behind her as she continued to walk, although she was aware that they had been following her for the past few minutes, she wasn't dumb enough to cause a commotion if it wasn't needed. Her steps faltered as she heard the familiar jingle of her phone, notifying her that she was receiving a call and calmly placed her groceries on the ground as she grabbed the device out of her pocket and check the caller I.D. Frowning when she didn't recognize the number, she cautiously answered the call and slowly pressed the phone against her ear before listening to the voice on the other end, not noticing the person who had been approaching her come closer.

_"Is Ms. Scarlet available?" _The voice on the other line was not one she recognized and yet the oddly firm and authoritative tone they held was somewhat familiar to her and so she unconsciously straightened her posture and tensed. She didn't realize she was shaking until she had to steady the hand holding her phone against her ear as she responded smoothly.

"This is she." She found it odd that someone had called her cell phone only to ask if she were the one speaking though, the more she listened the more the weight of the call dawned on her. Her body began to tremble as she let the phone slip from her hand and cover her mouth, squeezing her eyes shut as her trembles increased violently, to the point where she could no longer stand and dropped to the cold concrete. She could faintly hear her name being called out over and over but she refused to acknowledge the voice as a sob racked her body. Then another and another until all she could do was cry out in anguish.

"Erza!" she felt two arms wrap around her as the familiar scent of her best friend wafted toward her at full force. She winced and continued to release her cries as she griped the edge of his shirt, him stroking her hair as he did. "Erza!? Hey, Erza! What's wrong? What happened!?" Jellal desperately called out to her and she knew that she was worrying him but all she could think about was how she wish she could just tell him, once more time. She didn't get to; she didn't get to tell him, she didn't get to see him-

"J-Jellal!" she whimpered, gripping his shirt tighter as she felt his arms tighten around her. At the moment, she didn't care how she looked, how the rain poured down her dress, as if sensing the ominous feelings around her or how much she worried anyone, the only thing on her mind was one person. "S-Simon h-he-" she gulped harshly and fisted her hands as she sobbed in the arms of her best friend, "he's dead Jellal! He's dead!"

-She didn't get to say goodbye.

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**She always had this fear that he'd leave her behind**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Ohayo minna! So Stroke-of-Midnight87727 is back from her trip and apparently it was pretty good from some of the things she had told me on the bus but I will let her explain further. Anyway so poor Erza and Simon! A fair amount of you were pretty upset about the announcement of Erza and Simons engagement but none of you knew that this was coming did 'ya? Anyways feel free to vent! Because I know some of you will comment on that but one question! What did you think Gajeel was talking about and why is Lucy so hesitant on talking to him?****  
****Love you guys~! Thanks for reading!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: SO I am back from my trip and it was fun though the art museums weren't particularly entertaining just being there was great! Although the drivers were umm... special, I'll just let you off with that. Anyway hopefully you enjoyed that small yet sad Jerza moment in the end there! Thank you guys so much for reading! Until next time!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	9. Chapter 8: A glimpse of her suffering

**Hello**

**So guys if you want to hear the song as you read scroll**

**down to the bottom to find out the name**

**and who its by.**

**When Lucy and Natsu sing it will be**

**Lucy, **_Natsu_**, _both_**

**Just so we're clear on that.**

**There is some information on upcoming stories (not for awhile)**

**in the comments at the bottom**

**while Stroke-of-Midnight87727 informs you about absences **

**in June due to school.**

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Music makes the pain fade**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter: 8: A glimpse of her suffering **

**~QOoOQ~**

It's been one month since Simon's death, Erza was still recovering from her fiancés sudden death and Lucy had been trying to help her cope with it all as much as she could in-between her jobs and school but she barely gave a shit about the latter so must of her time was devoted to the scarlet haired woman. The cause of Simon's death was due to being shot three times, once in his lower abdomen, his bicep and collar bone, when he was caught in the crossfire between the police and a man they deemed a potential threat to the well-being of civilians as he had been found lurking around secluded alleys watching people walking by.

Erza knew the dangers that would come to both of them when they had started dating considering their job positions she had readied herself for the worst. At least_ Thought _she had. Although when she received the phone call from their chief informing her of her fiancés death, reality hit her hard and Erza realized that she was in no way ready for the news she thought she had overcome. Paramedics had said that even if Simon had survived-which was highly unlikely- the young police officer would have been paralyzed for the rest of his life, and even then it would be a short one as they explained they predicted his life span-had he survived, would only of been a few months-a year at the most.

And although she knew it was better, her heart still protested at the thought of it, she wanted to be selfish, she wanted to be ignorant but life was cruel and she was not blessed with selfishness nor ignorance. When people told her ignorance was bliss, she always laughed in their faces, but now she knew the true meaning behind those words, ignorance was truly bliss.

The ceremony as she liked to call it, was dreadful but she did not cry, she didn't scream and curse Mavis, she didn't drown herself in sorrow, Erza stood their blankly and just stared, all life that was in her previously had died with him while the bastard that placed Simon in his coffin was still alive roaming the streets. That day she swore on her fiancés grave that she would avenge his death and put belligerent criminal in jail where he belonged, and although the scarlet haired woman's rage held no boundaries Erza knew she was no exception to the law-

And Erza Scarlet was no killer.

The identity of the murderer was still unknown seeing as the cops had little time to corner the man and get a full description on the male although they were able to inform detectives including herself, some minor details of the criminal. It was then that Erza was found by Lucy, in her room, drowning herself in her investigation all the while mumbling things that went on deaf ears as the blonde catered to her every need. The scarlet haired detective had been so caught up in her research that she began to worry the blonde with her vindictiveness and so as not to worry the teen she put up an act, one that even her closest friend could not see through.

She came out of her room more often and made up for it at work by staying late, she ate more while Lucy was around but didn't eat at all when she wasn't, she smiled like usual out in public and cried when she was alone. All her suffering, pain and anguish was hidden from the prying eyes of her friends and open to the four walls enclosed around her as she researched, never stopping once unless Lucy was home or the basic necessities of showering and washrooms. So there she sat, drinking her coffee as her blonde roommate hastily poured herself a bowl of cereal as she put on her shirt,

"Hey!" She called out with a smirk crossing her features as she watched in pure amusement as Lucy struggled with her current predicament and threw a cheerio at her, "No naked people allowed in my kitchen~!" she teased, chocking on her drink as the previously mentioned cereal piece was thrown back at her,

"I'm not naked!" the blonde squawked at her friend as she struggled with her constraints against the now hindered situation, "Don't lump me with that exhibitionist Gray!" Erza chuckled wryly and shook her head, the young high school senior had woken up late due to a malfunction in her alarm clock and was currently rushing to eat and dress herself at the same time, the scarlet haired woman narrowed her dark brown eyes as she caught small glimpses of the blemishes marring her friends skin.

She refused to call them scars however, Lucy would look away and turn her attention to a different task and answer _'they're nothing like scars, each one is a memory with a special story of how I got it, like a story, they are reminders.' _Erza had never argued against her words, knowing just how delicate the word scar could be for the blonde but if anyone were to tell her she didn't have any, there were more than just external ones to see. Lucy had been marked through and through, all by different situations, but as Erza had always told her, they were signs of a warrior-a survivor even.

She laughed bitterly, here she was moping in her sorrow when the blonde had a hell of a lot more to suffer from but she never let anyone see it, she never let it bother her, and that was what Erza saw made her a warrior and a survivor. Yes, she was mourning and yes, she had every right to cry over the loss of her fiancé but did she really have the right to wallow in her despair when others had larger problems to ace every day, not only Lucy but others around them. Every day they pass people on the streets, in the mall or in the park and they all carry their own burdens, some far greater than other while other compared to them seemed like a mere problem.

She needed to be more like Lucy, she had put up an act but she realized that she was doing what she had done when she was so young, something she had always done even in the times where she was with Jellal, she denied. Sometimes she realized that denial was good but denying the truth of Simons death was one thing she couldn't run away form, she stared at the sparkling ring she refused to take off, Jellal had held her that day and taken her home. He had spent the night and cooked for Lucy and himself since she had refused anything offered to her, although grateful, she was not hungry and allowed Jellal to take her to bed, he sat there for Mavis knows how long and held her hand until she fell asleep.

"Erza! I'm leaving!" she faintly heard Lucy tell her as the door slammed shut after she reminded the blonde to be careful to her way to school, she blew on her coffee, she was happy to be surrounded by such great people. Natsu and Gray had attempted to cheer her up but ended in a large headache on both parts, Cana had given her some of her best 'booze', Levy had read stories to her and offered to help around the house every so often, Jellal had offered to stay with her, Lucy had supported her so much that she had no words to describe her thanks. Loke and Cobra had stayed to watch movies with her, although there was some protest from Cobra when they watched some girly movies but was silent throughout it.

Erza had so many people worry over her and yet she choose to wallow away in her sorrow, and one thing that had hit her hard was the questions as to whether or not Simon would have been happy to see her like this. Though she knew the answer, she turned the other way knowing full well that Simon would want her to move on and live her life and not dwell on his death but peruse the path he couldn't. Erza looked back down at her engagement ring before slowly sliding it off and putting it in her pocket, "Simon," she whispered and clenched her fist, "I love you so much... I miss you."

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

To say Natsu was a little worried was an understatement. He was sweating in nervousness for his and Lucy's performance that they had been informed of a month prior to this but the reason for his distress was not because of who he was singing with-in fact he was overjoyed that it was his childhood friend that he was singing with, it was the fact that they had only practiced once together out of the whole duration of the month. Though he admitted that he had doubted Lucy a few times on whether she would be able to handle it but quickly dismissed his doubt seeing as she had no reason to do it the way she was if she couldn't.

Unless she was avoiding him.

She wouldn't sacrifice their school project because of that, right? He sighed, he wasn't even sure if he could feels secure about that. He listened with little interest as Gray and Juvia sang, though they were both great singers, they still had to work on the chemistry part of the song, though he knew that his rival was greatly disturbed by the bluenette's recent-non- stalking routines of passing by his house and waving at him through the window and he had even been told that Gray had heard her voice in his house during the night.

That was the greatest horror story that he had ever been told.

Being a celebrity was no easy ride, they had to deal with fans like Juvia almost on a daily basis but never to the point of where they would somehow enter where they were staying, sure they no longer had the luxury of security guards but they still felt secure in their own homes, that is, until now they did. He shook his head, he was getting side tracked, Lucy still wouldn't talk to him unless it was for the project and although he hated to admit it, he was barely making any progress in their relationship.

Natsu just wanted to be like they were but she would tell him no or they couldn't, he clapped with the class as Gildarts called their names and the two performers took their seats, he would receive more and more riddles from the friends that stayed with Lucy and one time he had even overheard Levy talking to Gajeel about Lucy having nightmares. He walked up on stage with the blonde and grabbed a microphone as the music started, he may not have understood exactly why everything had turned out the way it was but he wanted to find out what made her hurt so much that she had to block everyone out. Lucy hiding things from others so as not to worry them.

That was one thing that had never changed.

**"You say that you're never gonna leave me**  
**Well two times that ya tell me that ya need me**  
**Well this line is mine, just think about it**  
**You don't know**  
**You don't know**  
**You don't know"**

Lucy closed her eyes, she had to admit that she was slightly nervous about performing in front of everyone, though she had done it dozens of times before never had she done it where they had only practiced once although she only had herself to blame for that and she knew this yet she was grateful that the time she had spent on this was short.

**"Don't say you'll never find somebody like me**  
**Well keep quiet baby, I don't wanna to hear you speak**  
**The words you say, they don't mean a thing**  
**You don't know**  
**You don't know**  
**You don't know"**

**"Hush now baby don't say a word**  
**You better give it up or you're gonna get hurt**  
**Hush now baby don't say a word**  
**You better give it up or you're gonna get hurt"**

_"You remembered Luce?"_

_"Of course I practiced every night!"_

_"That's my girl!"_

She clenched her fist to her side and stared at her best friend who looked on with concern pooling in the back of his eyes as he kept his cool façade on but she could tell that his concern ran deep and so she willed herself to quirk the ends of her lips so as to sooth his worry. She was so glad to have friends like him around.

**"You think I don't know**  
**That you don't mean it,**  
**That you don't mean it.**  
**And you don't think it shows**  
**That I still need it,**  
**That I still need it.**  
**You think I won't go**  
**If you don't feel it,**  
**If you don't feel it.**  
**We fall in, fall out, follow**  
**Hush, hush, hush don't say a word"**

She gulped silently as her part finished, Natsu was up now and he was staring intently at her she wanted to scream at him to not look at her like that, to not peruse the hope in his eyes but she couldn't , she was captivated-trapped in his onyx eyes as he sang. The song was so personally, what she had written and what he had written were things that were on their minds, things they had to get off their chest and yet couldn't seem to talk to each other about, and though she had to alter the lyrics slightly so no one would know the true meaning behind their twisted words, Natsu and herself were the only ones to know.

And she wasn't sure how she felt about him cracking another part of her mask.

_"Hey you say I'm only hearing what I want to_  
_But you don't wanna hear a word if how I need you_  
_And I know we both don't hear a thing_  
_You don't know_  
_You don't know_  
_You don't know"_

Natsu wondered to himself if all they ever did now was argue, he could barely withstand a normal conversation with his best friend and now even when they were singing, they were arguing and it was about the same thing. Something that he did to make her this way and now she was fighting back with all her might while he was trying to mend their relationship. He wanted to be with her, eh wanted to hold her close and whisper things to her, tell her he loved her like that day.

And even now, he would say it within a heartbeat.

_"So don't say I need to learn to listen to you better_  
_You'll pull it away from me forever_  
_I just can't get my head around it_  
_You don't know_  
_You don't know_  
_You don't know"_

_"That sounded Great Luce!"_

_"Really thanks Natsu!"_

_"Yeah! You should sing with me again!"_

Bits a pieces of memories flashed through her mind as they sang, so much that's he found herself blinking repeatedly to make it go away although her efforts were futile and she felt restricted in her ability to control her emotions. Glimpses of pain flashed across her faces as more memories of them singing duets popped up one after another, she could even hear their voices clearly harmonizing with each other. Something she found herself missing.

**"Hush now baby don't say a word **_(Hush now baby don't say a word)_  
**You better give it up or you're gonna get hurt **_(You better give it up or you're gonna get hurt)_  
**Hush now baby don't say a word **_(Hush now baby don't say a word)_  
**You better give it up or you're gonna get hurt **_(You better give it up or you're gonna get hurt)"_

Their voices weren't molding together like most duets that were sung, she willed herself not to sing along with him as he continued to stare at her and Lucy could practically feel her whole body heat up with emotion, the sweat drip down her face and feel the pain coursing through her, she promised herself she was not going to break and yet here she was crumbling at his feet just because of them singing together.

_"You think I don't know_  
**That you don't mean it,**  
**That you don't mean it.**  
_And you don't think it shows_  
**That I still need it,**  
**That I still need it.**  
_And you think that I won't go_  
**_If you don't feel it,_**  
**_If you don't feel it._**  
**We fall in, fall out, follow**  
**Hush, hush, hush don't say a word (say a word, say a word, say a word, say a word, say a word)"**

_"Can we try it again at the bridge Natsu?"_

_"Yeah, I think I might have messed up there, sorry Luce..."_

_"Ha, don't worry about it Natsu, no one cane notice,"_

_"Yeah but that will ruin your voice than Lucy!"_

The quick rise and fall of her chest didn't go unnoticed by her flirtatious cousin who gave her a concerned look but she shook her head slightly, signaling him to drop the matter although she knew that he wouldn't. She gripped the microphone in her hand as she finally turned to the man she had loved for so long and somehow managed to let go, something she was too familiar with for anyone to know.

**"I know we can't make life make you again**  
_Well I know you wanna back track and start again_  
**I think you know I'm worth fighting for**  
_I think we should hush, don't say a word"_

He doesn't know.

_"I don't ever want to see you again!"_

He doesn't _need_ to know.

_"No wonder why she's gone!"_

He doesn't need to see

_"Pathetic you need to hide them all! You're useless!"_

He doesn't need to hear

_"Dead! Dead! Because of you!"_

Some things were better left unknown.

_"I know we can't make life make you again_  
**I know you wanna back track and start again**  
_But I know you think that I'm worth fighting for_  
**I think we should hush, don't say a word"**

Unwanted memories flashed as she saw the guilt in his eyes, she flinched, why though? She should be happy, drowning in glory of his new found emotion; maybe he finally realized why she was angry? She knew though, she knew that he had no clue what he had done and she knew he was sorry but she couldn't let him see what happened really impacted her, really hurt her, and made her suffer.

She didn't _want_ him to see.

**_"Hush now baby don't say a word_**  
**_You better give it up or you're gonna get hurt_**  
**_Hush now baby don't say a word_**  
**_You better give it up or you're gonna get hurt"_**

It was like he had said.

_"Lucy you need to let go!"_

She needed to let go of things that had already released their hold on her, but she couldn't and that was why she popped a pill into her mouth every night, that was why she walked the streets at night, that was why she made sure people hated her so they didn't care enough to try and see past her mask, so they didn't get close, so she wouldn't get hurt. She needed things to stay that way, she didn't want to be forgiven, she didn't want to be apologized to, she didn't want help, she didn't want to stay.

**"You think I don't know**  
_That you don't mean it,_  
_That you don't mean it_  
**And you don't think it shows**  
_That I still need it,_  
_That I still need it_  
**You think that I won't go**  
**_If you don't feel it,_**  
**_If you don't feel it_**  
**_We fall in, fall out, follow_**  
**Hush, hush, hush don't say a word"**

Lies.

Every single things spouted form her mouth were lies and she knew, she wanted to be with Natsu, she wanted to have things like they were before but she couldn't that's why she screamed, that's why she cried and that was why she suffered, things couldn't be the same, and they never could she was too far gone for it to happen.

Lies

**"Change my mind**  
_I thought we were fine_  
**this is goodbye**  
_Just one more try'_

_'Wait for me..."_

_"W-What?"_

_"I said wait for me..."_

_"Natsu..."_

Her eyes closed painfully tight as continued to sing her lines. Bile rose in her throat as she remembered, the man she was beside, the man she was singing with was the man she had loved all those years ago. The man that had lied to her, that man that she held so close, the man that prevented her from fully moving on, the man that had always held her together, Natsu was always the one that's he could never grow tired of thinking about, no matter what and although it hurt to admit it.

He was the man that held her heart.

**"And change my mind**  
_I thought we were fine_  
**This is goodbye**  
_One more try_  
**_Hush, hush don't say a word."_**

The sound of a microphone dropping resounded around the room as all eyes turned to the shaking blonde that surprised even Gajeel, she looked so fragile and broken and instantly he knew that the barriers she had built up were breaking he watched in heated concern as she covered her mouth and raced out of the room. She was remembering and form what Gajeel could tell it was a lot that even she couldn't handle at the moment, he glanced at Natsu, especially not now.

_"I love you too Luce..."_

Some things hurt to remember.

* * *

**Chapter 9**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Her silence is her way of saying she's in pain**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Well guys my latest obsession with Marianas Trench has yet to be calmed and so here is a song by the lead singer Josh Ramsay and Emily Osment, I am not a fan of her work but I like this song which is called Hush, the only collaboration the two had done and I thought this would fit Natsu and Lucy perfectly. Recently I have come up with more story idea which should be published sometime in the summer after My stories are almost finished or are completed. I also would like to inform you that I will be participating in CoLu week which starts June 21-27, I thought I'd give it a try since it will be a bit of a challenge seeing as I have never written anything with Lucy and Cobra being romantically involved together, so if it sucks feel free to tell me when its published. Thanks for supporting guys!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: Well Shattered-Nightmares712 took up a lot of space _*Glares*_ so I am going to keep this brief, our exams are coming up on June 18th-23rd not including the weekend obviously so just as a reminder we will not be updating for those days with the exception of CoLu week for her but since Shattered-Nightmares712 will be making those before exams there will be no worry. Thanks for reading guys, until next time~**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	10. Chapter 9: Running and Hiding

**So I decided to update**

**this because I haven't updated in awhile**

**and I'm pretty sure**

**some of you are excited to see what happens next**

**and so **

**here we are and you get to find out what happens next!**

**It's like 1:30 AM right now and I just needed to get this finished**

**so I can updated 'Hells Gate' tomorrow**

**like I was supposed to today.**

**I'm gonna stop blabbering now and let**

**you enjoy the chapter.**

**Here you are!**

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**'Despite the Pain I still feel it...'**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 9: Running and Hiding**

**~QOoOQ~**

"LUCY!" The startled and shocked yell of the salmon haired singer resounded around the music room, he was worried about his best friend and had to wonder why she ran off in the first place. Her face looked so hurt but he didn't even know whys he would be feeling like that, they sang a song-a duet together and to him they sounded great and to see her run out of the room right after finishing it confused him. Was it really so hard to be this close to him-to not even have the ability to sing together without causing her pain?

He found himself questioning what he did to hurt Lucy so badly that she can't even stand to sing with him like they always had? She encourage him to leave and pursue his love of music and leave her behind so she couldn't possibly be mad at him for leaving so what could it possibly be? He found himself wondering why she wouldn't just tell him what he did to make her so upset, eh hated to see her in pain and was even angry at himself when he saw the small tear drop down her face as she ran out the room.

All of this could be solved if she told him what exactly he had done but then again, nothing could ever be that simple right? Life was so fucking twisted and he bet that Mavis just loved to watch them suffer and beg for mercy, while he wanted to push away any of the things he was feeling he knew he couldn't and so as he watched the love of his life run out the door, soon to be followed by her flirtatious cousin he stormed out of the room only moments later and out the building.

Popping a motion sickness pill in his mouth on the way to his car he couldn't help but crush his drink in his hands, he wanted so desperately to be with Lucy, to hold her, kiss her, comfort her when she was sad, he just wanted to be in her life all together but everything she was doing and saying, she didn't want to be in his.

His heart sunk at the thought of her never wanting to be around him again, he hit the wheel angrily as he drove through town, he loved her dammit! He wasn't sure how much more pain he could take, he still had a small sliver of hope that he hung onto-one where he hoped for her to respond to his feelings eagerly with good intent but he had no clue what she was thinking anymore. Maybe it was like she had said when he first came back; she was no longer the Lucy he once knew.

He found himself thinking of their fight they had only awhile ago, his words echoing in his head, _"Stop holding onto situations that have let you go!" _maybe he needed to take the advice he had given her instead. Maybe she had already let go- he wouldn't doubt that she had moved on while he was gone and though it was painful to think of, he knew that he couldn't make her wait forever, maybe she had found love in another man?

If she had Natsu only hoped for one thing-that she still kept him in her heart, even if the man she was with-if any at all- had a bigger part in her heart than him, he just wanted her to keep him close in her heart, to never forget the love that he held and still did for her. He knew he would never forget the way she looked at him, the way she would smile at him or hug him every time he told her he would see her later, though he had never told her goodbye, he refused to because goodbye meant leaving forever and he'd be damned if he let that happen.

He cared and loved her too much to let her out of his life and even if things weren't like they were before, at least she was still there, somewhere he could watch her from afar and think of how much he screwed up in making the choice to leave her. He needed to find a place to hide from all the drama in his life, somewhere where nobody could find out what he was thinking.

He kenw the exact place he needed to go to and so he switched his lanes hastily and sped off towards his old friends bar where he could hide away from the world and get piss-ass drunk without be questioned as to why he was doing it. Things certainly weren't looking good for him so far ever since coming back to Magnolia and although he was happy to see his childhood and current love, he still felt like he was being stabbed repeatedly as he regretted his decision of leaving her and giving her a reason to avoid him like she was.

Natsu wasn't quite sure what he was planning on doing in the future to try and convince Lucy to trusting him and coxing her to tell him what he did wrong but he did know one thing for sure.

He was getting drunk as fuck tonight.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

She ran. That was all she could do to stop everyone from seeing the tears that fell from her face, to hide the pained emotions showing so plainly shown on her face, and most of all-to hide the desperation in her eyes. She inwardly reprimanded herself with a bitter-almost animalistic snarl, this was all she could ever do, run. Run away from her problems with her tail between her legs, she was wimp, a weak fucking little wimpy baby girl that couldn't even handle herself against the fucked up life she lived.

All her life she ran, hell she even ran from _Natsu_ of all people. She slammed the door open to the rooftop and finally allowed herself to stop, she was not a runner, Lucy Heartfilia was a fighter, she never ran-at least, that was what her mother always told her. She gave in though, she gave up the fight against life and just accepted her-almost tragic- fate, something her mother would never have approved of but then again, who was she to object on her giving up now? She stared at the clouds in the air, pulling her leather jacket closer to her body as she felt the cool autumn air blow past her.

Lucy sighed, she shouldn't of run off like that-especially in the middle of Music class, the only class she actually enjoyed taking. She laughed dryly as a tear slipped out of her eye, she acted all high and mighty-the badass of the school who didn't give two shits about anyone she crossed paths with and didn't refuse a good fight and yet here she was crying over a fucking duet with Natsu.

The girl in her other classes, she mused, would have cried like her but for two totally different reasons-theirs being having the opportunity to sing their ugly hearts out and cry out when he rejects their offer of spreading their slutty legs for him, but Lucy, she was different-yes once she had thought of allowing Natsu to do things to her that any other man would have dreamed of but it was destroyed months after he left and so she was crying for the holes left in her aching heart, only one of which being done by the salmon haired singer himself.

She knew this could all be solved-well mostly- by just telling him why she was so angry with him, why she refused to meet his eye, why she ignored him at all costs but she was unable to for reasons unknown to anyone but her. She laughed as she raised a shaky hand to her mouth to light the cigarette she had unconsciously placed between her plump lips, why seemed to be a word popping up a lot in her life nowadays, the first time being when he first left, why did she have to fall in love with such an idiot?

_'Lucy! Come on we have to get out of here!' the boy pulled at her arm away from the burning house, 'It's not safe here anymore!' his relentless tugs on her arm only furthered the fear in her system,_

_'why are they here!? Why are they doing this!?' Her wide brown eyes were filled with terror as she gazed at the burning houses surrounding her and the boy tugging at her arm._

_'We need to go! ...NOW!'_

She whimpered and grabbed at her throbbing head, they were coming back again, those dreaded day dreams that filled her with terror just as she had so easily expressed within them, "Pill's, pill's, pill's!" she muttered painfully as she dug through her bag that she had stashed up on the rough behind the small supply shed, "where are the motherfucking pills!?"

Her breathing went ragged as she desperately searched for the solution to her vivid dreams, these were the only ones she could see throughout the day and sometimes she could barely even stand it that she would end up walking out of whatever classroom she was in to escape prying eyes as she would clutch her head. She fumbled with the bottles and read each label hastily before finally finding the right bottle and opening it with hurried movements and shaking hands before popping a pill in her mouth.

_'Where's Mama!?' she cried desperately as they ran from the burning flames, 'Mama!? MAMA!?' He growled and tugged at her arm making her collide with his small-slightly burned- chest,_

_'Stop calling for her! If she's in a tough spot and here's you crying out for 'er then you will get those bastards on us and maybe even get her hurt in the process!' she whimpered at his harsh but truthful words, allowing him to pull her into the shadows of one of the rare still standing homes before hugging her to him and rubbing her dirtied back. 'Stop your crying! It ain't 'gonna do you no good..."_

Her chest heaved as the pain increased, swearing under her breath as she rolled onto her sweat coated back. How much more fucked up could she get? She felt insane and maybe she was but more so when she was popping pills into her mouth, always told 'these will make you feel better', did they ever think to tell her what those pills would make her think?

She felt like some savaged beast, taking medicine so she wouldn't flip out and kill whatever person was near her. She wasn't insane, no-she was far from it and she knew this but just being alone was what made her feel like this. The pain increase as she cried out in anguish, desperately scratching at her head to try and ease the pain-but to no avail her pathetic attempts were futile as darkness slowly overtook her.

**...**

"Lucy?" she felt her body moving with a small amount of pressure on her shoulders as a voice called out to her, she squinted as the voice repeated her name-not willing herself to wake up but sadly her wishes were ignored as the shakes continued and she snapped her eyes opened to meet the worried eyes of her cousin.

"Loke?" she called out quietly, unsure if she was hallucinating or not but the strong arms wrapping around her proved to her that he was very much really and it was then that' she could feel a slight shake run through him as he held her in his arms.

"Oh thank Mavis Lucy!" he sighed in relief as he hugged her tightly, "I saw you passed out on the roof drenched in sweat! I thought something happened!" He shook her continuously as he glared at her with a stern look in his eyes, "why are you making me worry about you so much!?" She clutched her head and winced as he sighed and ran a shaky hand through his hair, finally releasing her from his arms.

"Sorry for worrying you..." she mumbled half-heartedly as she rubbed her temples, just as she was getting a good sleep without any dreams he had to come an wake her, but she knew he meant well and so she decided against smacking him in the head for rudely rousing her from her dreamless sleep that left her feeling almost blissful.

He eyed her for a moment, something had been off about her ever since she woke up and he knew it but the reminder of what had happened just after her duet reminded of why he had even chased after her. Placing a gentle and comforting hand on her slender shoulder he asked gently, "... Princess are you okay?"

She paused momentarily. Was she okay? She definitely was not but oddly enough she found herself nodding, slightly wincing at the throbbing in her head before reassuring him, "... Yeah I'm fine Lo, just tired." It was true, she was extremely tired and slightly agitated at the brightly shinning sun that paired with the chilly wind and blowing leaves, only further reminder her that it was already October.

"You know he means well right?" He suddenly spoke, sitting next to her silently as they both stared at the now setting sun-she now realized just how long she had been asleep for.

"..." She stayed silent, she knew who the ginger was speaking of but she truly had no idea of his intentions as he perused her continuously and urged her to speak to him just like they always had. 'It would be nice to...' she found herself thinking of how delightful it would be to once again talk to Natsu as if he had never left, always being her best friend but that spot was filled years after he left.

"He's not trying to hurt you Lucy," he spoke gently, glancing at her as he fixed the position of his glasses,"-he just wants you back in his life, we all do, but you 'gotta be willing to let us in for us to do that..." She knew he did, she knew they all did but it wasn't the four year absence that stopped her from opening up to them, it's was the unwillingness to be hurt once again that stopped her from letting them back in so easily again, even Loke was hard to talk to but she found herself doing just that, breaking down the barrier that she had built between them.

"I know it's just hard Loke."

"It's only hard if you make it that way Lucy," he reminded her as she turned her gaze to him, "it will be difficult to do at first and I may not know the whole story of what happened while we were gone but I know a bit and that much tells me that you really need to let it out Lucy." She knew, she knew it all of what he was saying she had heard it many times and although she knew that these words were right she still found herself struggling. "It doesn't have to be me but I think you owe Natsu an explanation, at least just a little bit..."

"...I know," she reluctantly admitted, placing her elbow on her knee as she racked her hand through her blonde locks, letting gout a frustrated sigh in the process. "I know he does Loke but it's hard for me, I don't even know anymore..." she covered her face with her hands and shook her head softly, her brain was just a jumble puzzle that she couldn't seem to solve-no matter how smart she was deemed.

"...Lucy?" he called out softly, looking her in the eye as she peeked through her fingers, only letting a small smile at the nostalgic meekness in her expression at the moment, "Do you-" he sighed, turning away from her, it was getting harder to talk about this stuff and he was slightly uncomfortable with subject but he didn't mull over it knowing she needed to talk about it. "-Do you still love Natsu?"

"..." a few moments of prolonged silence passed by as the wind wisped through the small space between them, eliciting a shiver from both of them. "Honestly Loke, I don't even know myself anymore. I'm sure I do and that's why it's all the harder for me to talk to him like we used to after everything and I know it's not all him but he had a big part in it Loke, and that's why it got so bad." She stared at him as she explained her troubled feelings to him, he was one of the few people who she could actually talk to truthfully now, and she was thankful that she was able to.

"...Well just try and tell him some things, even if they're small." He told her quietly, "Everything you say counts Lucy and he holds onto that hope that you gave him all those years ago." He was explaining for both of them, almost like he was translating something that neither of them could figure out how to say one another.

"..." His words were answered with silence as she mulled over what he told her, she knew that Natsu wanted things to go back to the way they were but she also knew she wasn't quite ready to start bringing up everything from their past. Her thoughts turned to him at the memories of their childhood, they were so happy all the time, always laughing with each other, always close to one another and eventually falling in love with one another, they were so innocent and they reality hit them and they realized that the world wasn't all cotton candy and rainbows.

"He still loves you Lucy..." he told her after a few minutes of silence, staring at her seriously, showing her just how much truth was behind the words he dared to utter. "He truly does, and though I hate to admit it his love for you even outshines our unyielding love!" She giggled lightly at his failed attempt to lighten the mood but she was thankful no less but then his words finally hit her, was he really still in love with her? Had he really kept his word or did he break them just like his last promise?

After a beat of silence she meekly spoke, feeling the slight burning of her cheeks and the growing redness was surely not from the cool wind hitting her cheeks, "D-Does her really-?"

"Hm?" he glanced at her, leaning back on his palms as he stared at the still setting sun, "Oh! You mean love you?" he chuckled quietly before nodding firmly. "Yeah, very much so Lucy."

So Natsu really did still love her. He hadn't stop loving her for all these years and suddenly her mind wandered to all the things she had done to forget him and get over the pain at one point lessening it before it came rushing back but now, what did she feel for her childhood love? She sighed and pouted silently, "... I'm so confused!"

"It's alright sometimes Lucy, just be careful how you go about this." he warned gently before standing up and staring down at her, "I know you're still going to be mad at him even with everything I told you but at least try and speak to him," he urged her, knowing full well that she could very well punch him at any moment for trying to convince her to do anything other than what she had originally planned. "for both your sakes Lucy." He smiled at her slightly, "The guys and I'm sure your friends too only want to make you happy." She nodded a small smile of her own gracing her lips, "I hope you figure things out son Princess..."

"Me too Lo."

"... But, 'ya know," he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at her as his signature flirty grin was aimed at her, "If you decide you don't want him anymore you can always run into my arms and we can elope~!" He made a motion of spreading his arms wide for her as she snorted and pushed him father away from her person.

"Get outta here 'ya perverted Lion!"

"Ah!" he cried in mocked pain as he dramatically placed his forearm on his forehead, "You punctured my heart Princess!"

"Yeah, Yeah~!"A bubbly laugh escaped her as she smirked and waved at him dismissively, ignoring the pout adorning his features, "and stop pouting you look like an ugly child doing that-a whinny one at that!"

"Bye Lucy," she nodded and waited until the rooftop door slammed shut before sighing and gripping the keys to her motorcycle, she needed to get her mind off things for a little while and what better way to do that other than drink away her problem at her dear friend Cana Alberona's bar. She would sort ervything out later that night while she was drunk. Everything was easier to handle when drunk.

So with that last thought in mind she headed off to her friends bar, fully intending on drinking the night away, only hoping that it would wash her problems away with it.

* * *

**Chapter 10**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**'It's the beginning of a war'**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Well guys that's the end of another chapter! I already know what's going to happen for the next few chapters so the updates may come quicker than usual like with 'Hell's Gate' but I'm not promising anything of the sort. I've decided to participate in CoLu week guys! It's from June 21st - June 27th so if you're interested check out the short multi chapter story once it comes out and don't worry the chapters are already written and finished so you can expect it to be short as in one chapter per day for the duration of the week so only seven chapter! Anyway thank you guys for your support and reviews! Until next time!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: We're back guys! It's been awhile but we're back to write some chapters for you guys, I'm sure you're excited for the next few chapters, I know I am! I have to warn you guys, we will be starting exams this week so we won't be updating this nor will Shattered-Nightmares712 be updating her other stories until exams are finished she will be posting already made chapters for her CoLu week story but I think that's about it! Thanks for being patient with us guys! Hope you enjoyed the chapter! Let us know if your confused about anything or just any opinions on the story would be nice to see! Again hanks for reading and supporting!  
Bye for now!  
**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	11. Chapter 10: World War Me

**Okay**

**so it's been awhile since I updated this**

**and I decided**

**that I would update it because I am stuck**

**on my other ones or I just **

**simply can't update the ones I am not stuck on**

**so here we are.**

**You may or may not be happy**

**to know that since I am almost finished**

**with exams I will be able to update more now**

**hopefully the reaction is positive!**

**Anyway,**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**'The Mirror knows what they have become...'**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 10: World War Me**

**~QOoOQ~**

**_"Wooh oh oooh this is world war me_**  
**_Wooh oh oooh I will never find peace, I'm the only enemy."_**

"Cana! Another round!" The young singer called out as he slammed his empty beer bottle on the marble bar top, he knew his friend was eyeing him oddly-in no way was Natsu a heavy drinker and yet he had four beer's and was continuing his binge drinking. Honestly he couldn't care less whether or not the brunette was worried about him-she had cause him and his friends heart attacks plenty of times from alcohol poisoning- right now, he needed to drown himself in his self-pity, just once.

He sighed and waited for his next drink, it had been hours since he had arrived at _Alberona's Bar _presumably, it was around eleven, but really he wasn't keeping track, it was hard he could barely see anything but the obvious flashing lights around the bar which Natsu suddenly found himself doubting whether it was a bar or a club.

"Y'know, 'ya shouldn't be drinking your problems away Natsu..." His drunkard of a friend sauntered up to him with his new beer in hand, "S'not like it's gonna go away or somethin'..." He glanced at her briefly before chugging half of the drink down and setting it back on the bar as he watched the ever busy bar with people laughing and joking around-oh how he envied them.

He knew Cana was watching him silently as he did the same to the rest of her customers but he knew that she just wanted him to talk but that was something that he was unwilling to do anytime soon. He closed his eyes and bobbed his head as he hummed the song he had sung not moments before he finished his third bottle of beer and Natsu was slightly unsure of how much more alcohol he could take, maybe he was drunk already?

"Natsu maybe you should go ho-"

"No." He refused to walk out of the bar and go home just so he could sleep, he didn't need it at the moment and he'd be damned if Cana made him go back where the darkness could consume his inner battle. "I'm not going back... I can't go back yet."

**_"I'm the king of doubt, I fight it out all on the inside_**  
**_I'm the poster child of denial, there's nothing I can't hide_**  
**_I'm punching holes in walls because, I let it build up way too long, sabotage_**  
**_Everything I ever had, and now I'm seeing red, there is no one else to blame, but the voices in my head."_**

He could never really shake Lucy off could he? The duet was something he had love, something that reminded him of how close they were before he left and how bright and happy she was, was it all just because he left? His hazy, drunken mind could barely come up with a suitable answer but then again, even when he was sober he couldn't seem to come to a conclusion on the matter so what was the difference whether he was drunk or sober thinking about the situation.

He laughed humorlessly, he was a fucking wimp, Lucy had bottled things up for so long until she finally broke down and it was because of him that she did so in the first place yet here he was wallowing away in his own self-pity. Maybe he could have a pity party with some of his other friends, surely they would join him? He took another swig of his beer and ran a clammy hand through his hair.

He truly was screwed up person.

He made the one girl he never wanted to make cry, made her revert to this new, badass Lucy that was nothing like the sweet, innocent Lucy he had known for so long. Maybe he needed to let go of that image though. Sweet, innocent Lucy was dead and badass Lucy was alive and kicking-literally- he needed to be taking his own advice instead of reprimanding Lucy about things, eh was the one holding onto the past and even though she was too at least she was willing to admit she had her own demons to fight.

While he, Natsu had no idea what his demons were, maybe they the things that told him to peruse his blonde best friend and try and reciprocate whatever relationship they had been at or whatever she wanted, whether it would be friends or romantic interests.

As long as he was near her that was all that mattered.

Natsu wanted to protect her and tell her to rely on him but with how things were the only thing he could do was back away from her and not say anything insensible although he knew it was next to impossible for him _not_ to say anything-he wanted to do anything to support Lucy and if she wanted him to leave than maybe he should.

**_"Wooh oh oooh this is world war me_**  
**_Wooh oh oooh I will never find peace_**  
**_I look into the mirror and I hate what I've become_**  
**_'Cause I'm the only casualty from damage that I've done_**  
**_I'm the only enemy in world war me."_**

He sighed, some things were better left unknown, his father had told him that awhile back when he tried once again, prying into Lucy's new life but everybody told him to figure it out himself or to solve whatever ridiculous riddle they told him. He groaned as his head began to throb, nothing was making sense anymore, life used to be so simple before he left and now look where his big ass had gotten. Natsu sighed and leaned back in the chair,

Why did he leave again?

To pursue a career.

To get a chance at doing what he loved.

To be who he really wanted to be.

But he wasn't anybody without Lucy; he never could be and never will be anything without Lucy. She was his remedy to the pain, a painkiller for his aches and battle wounds, a comforter when he was lonely, someone to hold when he felt the need to have someone close. Lucy was everything to him and his everything was finally slipping through his fingers and blowing out into the wind.

**_"I know you tried to show me the light, I feed on the darkness_**  
**_I've lost control, I'm down in a hole, I'm broken and helpless_**  
**_The noose is getting tight, so tight, will I make it through the night_**  
**_It's time to surrender to myself and crawl out of this hell, the battles in my head, there is nobody else."_**

"... Cana I'm going outside for a breather." He sighed and grabbed his drink as he did, placing some money down to cover his drink before stepping forward, ignoring the protest from his friend before walking out the door. The cool air felt oddly comforting on his flushed cheeks as he stared at the night sky, he never really took any time to admire the true beauty the night held but now that he did, he understood why Lucy had loved to stargaze so much.

The sight was breathtaking.

Just like Lucy, eh couldn't explain the true beauty of the stars that shone above him, everything little star had a significance to it and it was exactly like his best friend, she was beautiful beyond compare and every small detail about her was interesting and story within itself. She was so interesting and different than others, maybe that was why he was so attracted to her or more so drawn to her. Some things could not be explained and Natsu's constant want to be around his blonde haired best friend could be described as nothing more than love.

Natsu loved Lucy.

There was no doubt in it but what he worried about was whether or not Lucy still loved him and if she did, why wouldn't she allow him to get any closer to her in her life. A small smacking noise was heard next to him followed by a deep, males voice- he shrugged it was probably just two men getting rough with one another and if that was the situation than he really wasn't surprised. Most times he was the one fighting.

Even when he was younger he would fight against the bigger, stronger kids on the street-Lucy cheering him on by the side lines and telling him to be careful, Gray yelling insults and continuous strings of profanity while Macbeth and Loke just rolled their eyes and Jellal tried to break it up until Erza came. He closed his eyes with a nostalgic smile on his face, things back then were fun and nice-especially when he was around Lucy- but Natsu knew if he could have a do over he wouldn't do a single thing to change his choices.

A small whimper caught his attention and suddenly he was on high alert, maybe the noise he heard earlier was not two men roughhousing but a male and a female fighting outside of a bar.

"Dan, stop..."

Immediately his heart dropped.

**_"Wooh oh oooh this is world war me_**  
**_Wooh oh oooh I will never find peace_**  
**_I look into the mirror and I hate what I've become_**  
**_'Cause I'm the only casualty from damage that I've done_**  
**_I'm the only enemy in world war me."_**

His eyes immediately snapped in the direction of the voice and found himself choking on his drink, sitting just outside the bar was the very same blonde he had been thinking about only moments before but she wasn't alone, a male with brown hair and blue eyes and by the way Lucy was moving he could tell she was drunk and uncomfortable with the male breathing down her neck. His drink slipped from his grasp and landed on the ground with a clatter, startling the two as they turned to him,

"Natsu..." Her breath came out as a mere whisper as he balled his hands into tightly clenched fists and neared them, his anger was boiling the longer Lucy and the man were close together, he hated it, he hated seeing another man being close to her like that but he had no say in who Lucy was seeing but he did have the responsibility of protecting her, even if she was against it.

"I believe she told you to stop," he spat at the glaring male as he stood. Natsu was seething, the guy just looked fucking smug with his shit-eating grin and whatever other bullshit the guy had in mind, he didn't care all it was, was bullshit and as long as he kept the plans of doing things with _his _Lucy he wasn't baking down.

"Who asked you,' he jabbed a finger into the salmon haired singers toned chest with a smirk, "to get involved in our conversation Mr. Pinky?" He glanced back at Lucy, making Natsu's eyes narrow at the action-Mavis all he wanted to do was choke the man to death but there was no need at the moment and if it came to it than he would.

"My friend told you to stop," he cracked his neck as if to intimidate the opposite male, standing in front of Lucy. "If you don't stop than we're going to have a problem here now aren't we?"

"What are you?" he cackled, his words slurring slightly and the onyx eyed singer could just smell the disgusting smell of alcohol on his breath as he leaned forward into his face, "Are you her bodyguard? Lister here, I can fuck her however and whenever I want and you can't do nothing abou-" Natsu's anger soared at his words and no longer could he hold himself back from punching the drunk man in the face before grabbing the blonde singers wrist and dragging her behind the busy building.

He leaned against the wall and sighed, releasing her wrist as he did so. He cradled his head in his hands as he heard Lucy slide down next to him against the wall and suddenly he remembered why he had even walked over in the first place. Silently he opened his eyes to see the blonde quietly rubbing her now red cheek, gazing up at the stars without even the slightest hint of pain. Gently removing her small hand, he cupped her cheek and rubbed the slightly red skin with his hand as her gaze turned to him.

He hated that he couldn't have stopped it before anything happened, "I'm sorry..." he mumbled quietly as he brought her into hi side with surprisingly no resistance from her side.

**_"How do you run away when you're the enemy_**  
**_Knowing there's no way out, nothing's gonna save me now."_**

She stared at him slightly; his apology had definitely surprised her, had he figured out what happened? She narrowed her eyes to the gravel they were now seating themselves on, but not moving from her position, "why do you need to be sorry?" she asked quietly, almost terrified of his answer. She wasn't quite sure if she was ready to talk to him or even think about forgiving him just yet and if her imagination turned out to be correct, Lucy wasn't sure if she could provide a stable answer for him.

"..." Silence drifted through the night, her question lingering in the air as Natsu held a thoughtful expression on his handsome face, he sighed and ran his free hand through his unruly locks. "For not being there," a sharp intake of breath noted that she heard him before he continued, "I could have stopped that from happening to you, I'm sorry I wasn't quick enough." He apologized again and touched her flushed cheek again, "...does it hurt?"

She shook her head at both, the spot where Dan had hit felt like a dull thud poking her cheek it was nothing, but there was also the matter with how she had thought Natsu was apologizing for what happened.

But he didn't.

"...Hey Luce?" Ignoring the annoying nickname she pleaded him to stop calling her but refused to do, "what happened while I was gone-?" he seemed hesitant as he adjusted the scarf wrapped around his neck, "-Erza told me some things happened while I was gone and that you should be the one to tell me..." He scratched the back of his neck nervously as she sighed, she was glad that Erza had been considerate of her privacy but now because of that he was trying to invade it again.

Whether it was because of the amount of alcohol she had consumed or the annoyance she was radiating from being asked again, she found herself speaking, "After you left Natsu things got worse with Mama," she ran a shaky hand through her hair before sipping at her beer, "she ended up dying soon after you left maybe around six months? It doesn't really matter anyway." His brows furrowed, why was he never told that aunt Layla had died?

"What about Uncle Jude, Luce?" he felt her flinch slightly before turning her head away with a small frown marring her beautiful face that reflected the moons light, she sighed and leaned heavily against him.

"He's in jail Natsu,"

"WHAT!? WHY!?"

"I don't want to talk about it right now," Natsu stared down at her momentarily before nodding and leaning his head against her own, it felt nice to be so close to her without her insulting him or getting angry at him, they were alone and she was opening up to him, even if it wasn't much he felt like he made a crack in her mask.

**_"Wooh oh oooh this is world war me_**  
**_Wooh oh oooh I will never be free."_**

"I had moved on from you Natsu," she admitted as a small tear ran down the side of her face but she made no move to wipe the glistening substance and neither did her, words he had never expected to hear fall from her mouth and yet here she was with a guilt-stricken face. Had their promise really meant so little to her? "I think i was in love, at least that's what I had thought at the time, he was nice and treated me like I was a treasure or some shit like that I guess..." she mumbled and he was tempted to pull away from her at her comments but her warmth was too tempting and he found himself holding her tighter, both out of longing and fear of never reaching her.

"He was five years older than me and I was sixteen t the time so that would have made him twenty one," she chuckled self-deprecatingly, "he was an idiot and kind of reminded me of you actually and he was training to become a military personal but he doubted with his health that he would ever get it, but one day he was called and told him he would be drafted in the next few days." A sad look crossed her features as more tears spilt, this time Natsu willed himself to wipe away the dreadful liquid and pulled her into his lap.

He was suddenly glad that she was being so relaxed.

"I told him that I wanted to be with him before he left and we spent a night together, not that it was my first but I was willing this time..." She clenched her teeth, "I still get nightmares about things every so often but this is one of the reoccurring ones. A few months after he left he finally had time to call me and I had something to tell him, and I was about to but their camp was attacked." Her body shook as she buried her nose in his shirt, allowing him to run his hands through her hair. _'Mavis!' _he thought, _'hasn't she had enough yet?'_

"...Luce, do you mind telling me what you were going to tell him?"

"... You know he was planning on marrying me when he came back. He had promised, just like I had you, to wait and always come back to me but he didn't and left me alone," she sighed and turned her face away from view, "I was about to tell him I was pregnant." Just like that Natsu felt his heart sink, sure he was angry that she had broken their promise but if she was happy than that was what mattered to him, but right now she seemed anything but that.

"..." he stared at her tear-stained face and gripped her chin to force her to look at him, "Luce what happened to the baby?" If she was sixteen when she was pregnant than she would have already had the kid by now and from what he could tell, there were no children living in her and Erza's home so did that mean she gave it up?

"I had a miscarriage..." she mumbled sadly, "some things happened and the baby ended up dying and he was removed." She rubbed her stomach briefly before dropping her hand and resting her head on his chest, "this is only some of the things that have happened Natsu, you wouldn't want someone like me, I'm broken and I carry things no one could deal with-not even yo-" She turned her head to face him and was abruptly silenced when his lips connected with hers.

He wiped the silent tear that trailed down her cheeks and deepened the kiss-briefly noticing that she had a tongue piercing he didn't' notice- as his hands traveled from her cheeks to sift into her hair and cup the back of her neck gently as she pressed herself against him further, each lost in the embrace of one another, oblivious to the bustling night city around them. Slowly, he broke apart from her, it was the first kiss they had shared and it was something he would never forget nor would he regret no matter how many times she may hit him the next morning.

He pulled her closer and murmured against her lips, his hot breath fanning over her flushed cheeks, "It doesn't matter that you found someone else or if you're broken Lucy, nothing will change the fact that I love you and even if you don't forgive me yet," he wanted her to know, "I will do everything I can to make you forgive me and fall in love with me all over again."

"Natsu..." Her breathy whisper urged him on as his lips once again connected with hers and slid his hands along her back, maybe it was just the alcohol that had let them both talk so freely but either way Natsu meant what he told the blonde held against him, he would do anything and everything to get her to forgive him and sure he knew he was entering battle grounds just by telling her this-no _promising _her what eh did but for Lucy.

He'd go through millions of wars and fight against his own inner battle just to get her to love him again.

And she would, he knew.

She just needed to know how much he needed her.

And how much she needed him.

**_"Wooh oh oooh this is world war me_**  
**_Wooh oh oooh I will never find peace_**  
**_I look into the mirror and I hate what I've become_**  
**_'Cause I'm the only casualty from damage that I've done_**  
**_I'm the only enemy in world war me."_**

* * *

**Chapter 11**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**'Truth is, you're the reason I don't believe in Love anymore.'**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Some deep shit there! Not only that but you guys got some NaLu! I know I haven't really been putting in any Natsu and Lucy moments but it's building- so be patient with me! If there is any confusion in the beginning, Natsu is actually singing but its in past times so that's why its _italic _so hopefully that cleared it up for you guys if you were confused in the beginning anyway. Let us know what you guys thought? Sorry for teasing you in the end but thanks for reading anyway!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: So Shattered-Nightmares712 and I have been staying at my house every day after exams to just sit and watch anime, though most times we end up doing something else but it's still fun and apparently that's how she came up with the idea for this chapter. Don't ask me how she did-she just did. The song is called 'World War Me' by Theory of a DeadMan, so check that out if you'd like to hear it. I find the song suits that chapter quite well don't you think? Shattered-Nightmares was the one to pick that song out but I thought it sounded pretty good but anyway,****  
****Thanks for reading!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	12. Chapter 11: Calm Before the Storm

**I haven't update this in awhile**

**so here we are!**

**I just finished a drawing of Natsu**

**a little while ago and for some reason I feel inspired to write.**

**I'm glad you guys are liking the story so far**

**from what I can tell from the reviews!**

**Thank you for those who have been voting on the poll**

**the poll will end July 24th**

**so if you wish to participate in choosing the next story I publish**

**then make sure you do that before then.**

**Thanks again!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_'The worst kind of pain is when you're smiling-'_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 11: Calm before the Storm**

**~QOoOQ~**

Lucy stared at her friend, eyes wide and unblinking as she held the glass of water firmly in her hand as it pressed against her lips teasingly, her Advil sticking to tongue as it awaited the water to wash it down but the only sound that could be heard in the house is the quiet ticking of the clock and the blondes blaring music coming from her headphones. She was utterly repulsed and surprised at the same time as she heard the words her scarlet haired friend spoke, was she aware of the consequences that would come with what she was doing?

"Erza," she spoke hastily, her eyes darting away from her face momentarily to place her drink on the counter and swallow the pill without it, "yo-you can't be serious right now!" There was a pleading tone to her words which fell on stubborn ears as the scarlet haired detective crossed her arms over her chest and shook her head,

"I am completely serious Lucy," she told her, "you are coming along and that is final." Her sharp glare left no room for argument as she calmly sipped at her coffee, holding a novel in her other hand as she sat on a chair at the dining table, her book-she assumed was one that Lucy herself could not bring herself to read as she watched her friend blush every few sentences. Somehow the blonde found it hard to take her seriously while she had a blush on her pale cheeks, she shook her head,

"Whatever, when are we going?" sighing in defeat-knowing full well that she would not be able to worm her way out of this, she glanced at Erza and sipped at her water. Lucy watched as the scarlet haired woman glanced at the wall clock hanging beside her and nodded momentarily before returning her eyes on the 'interesting' book in her hand and blowing on her steaming coffee,

"In a half hour but I would like to leave within twenty," Lucy nodded and glanced down at herself before deciding she could just write a little more before they left and hefted herself off her position on the counter and dusted off her track pants,

"Alright, I have some free time then..."

Erza quirked a brow at her and set the items she held down on the table, "where do you think you're going looking like that?" The blonde again looked down at herself and felt slightly offended, she didn't find anything wrong with what she was wearing and she was unwilling to change even if she was not appropriate. "You can't possibly think I am going to let you out to an amusement park in that, do you?"

"What's so bad with this outfit?"

"Lucy," she sweat-dropped, "You're wearing sweats and you wish to wear that out on a date to the amusement park?" She shook her head and crossed her arms before glancing at the time, they had already wasted five minutes and she was not going to waste five more arguing with her about her inappropriate attire for a date. Standing up from her seat on the chair, Erza walked up to her friend with her hands now firmly placed on her hips and a small smirk ghosting her lips. "Come along, we are going to find something for you to wear."

She nodded and walked past her, into the blondes room quietly laughing as she did, calling back to the gaping blonde, "Close your mouth, Lucy, you'll catch flies."

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

"Erza," Lucy wined as she stared up at the midnight sky, under the gaze of the moon as she let out a breath-she still couldn't' believe the amusement park was open when she could already see her breath forming small clouds in the air, but she guessed since Halloween was soon approaching they kept it open for the annual 'scare park' they had. How she had allowed the scarlet haired demon to drag her here without much protest was beyond her but she decided to not question it as she sighed, "who are we even meeting here?"

Erza glanced at her as she crossed her arms, "the guys; Natsu, Gray, Loke, Macbeth and Jellal but Levy and Gajeel should be joining us too." The blondes mood brightened slightly at the mention of her friends, at least she would have someone to talk to other than the guys-although the problem was not them in particular but Lucy just wanted to have a break from all the drama that had been circulating around her as of recently. Tying her blonde locks into a ponytail, she sighed and watched as watched a van approach them before the members of 'Catching Fire' hop out of the back.

Glancing over at her scarlet haired friend, she watched as Erza walked over to her childhood friend and gave him a hug before joining him in the walk toward the amusement parks entrance, her frowning lips curled upward slightly as she watched her friend smile-it had been awhile since she was able to see her truly smile and Lucy was glad that Jellal was able to pull it out of her. Turning her head slightly after feeling a hand clap her shoulder she glared at the happy-go-lucky pink haired male grinning at her, this was the reason she did not wish to come meet up with the guys. "Yo! Luce!"

"Don't touch me Natsu," she shrugged him off and turned toward the parking lot with her hands shoved in her sweater pocket. Now the blonde was wearing a pair of black, ripped skinny jeans with a white tank top that reached her mid-thy and black pumps to match-something which she had argued back in forth about with her best friend who refused to show her where her boots were hidden, really she didn't see the reason behind dressing nicely. It wasn't as if she was going on a date with anyone, just hanging out with her friends and Natsu.

"But Luce~" he grinned cheekily at her before throwing his arm around her tense shoulders, "we're friends so why can't I do this or touch your shoulder?" She sighed and just simply shook her head in response, Natsu giving her a frown in response as a truck pulled into the parking lot before a small bluenette and a buff looking pierced male jumped out of it. The pinkette watched as his blonde friends beamed at them before running and giving the other female a hug and the larger male a high-five, Lucy always seemed to be happy around the two which he had recently f discovered the name of the male the blonde always hung out with Gajeel Redfox, he guessed she had gotten closer to some other people-Levy already being her friend from before he left- over the time that they were apart.

"Why did you even agree to going?" He overheard his friend ask the two which she earned a sheepish grin from the bluenette and a 'gihi' from Gajeel-Natsu was unsure as to what 'gihi' meant but he couldn't judge, people often asked him about his hair.

"I heard the idiot was coming along," he shrugged, "figured you wouldn't wanna be left alone with him if the others decided they wanted to do something else," after a moment of silence he added, "we all know he follows you like a lost puppy." Lucy face palmed as she heard her petite friend giggle while Gajeel let out his signature laugh, she still wondered as to how he had gotten a laugh like that but she couldn't ask for better friends despite their odd quirks. She nodded and turned to follow her two friends who began to walk toward the amusement park entrance before she grinned deviously and took off on a light jog before jumping onto her male friends back. "Oi! Whadda'ya think 'yer doin' bunny girl!"

"Getting a free ride, what does it look like?" She only earned a small sigh in response before they continued to approach the entrance gates where the rest of their group was waiting, leaving behind a dumbfounded Natsu and surprised Levy.

**_..._**

Lucy stared at the object dangling in front of her, she was unsure as to whether to take it and behead the damn thing in front of the person holding it or flip him the bird and walk away-either way sounded good to her but it was the temptation of doing both that made it hard. The blonde teen stood in front of her former best friend who-at the moment- was grinning widely, victoriously even, and holding out a stuffed snowman he won at one of the carnival games although she continued to insist the small plush was not a showmanship but in fact a small dog with an odd form but her friends seemed to think otherwise. Natsu chuckled, "c'mon Luce! I won the snowman for you!" a beat of silence passed over them, "I won't bother you anymore for the rest of the night~"

Eyeing the offending object Lucy deemed 'a dog' she glared stubbornly before glancing up into the plush winner's eyes, there was a slight twinkle and a glimmer of hope-she silently mocked him for the look- but most of all happiness that seemed to make his dark eyes shimmer, a look Lucy-admittedly-missed seeing while he was touring. Holding the stare for a moment longer before sighing she held out her hand, palm facing upward as she held it just beneath his, "give me the damn plushy." She received a large and happy grin from the salmon haired singer before he placed it in her awaiting hand, his own just barely brushing against her own, calloused fingers meeting smooth and soft ones-something they both had felt but only one responded.

The blonde flinched away from his touch and turned to tear through him but as she turned and caught his eyes, her words died in her throat, no longer able to show the fighting spirit she had developed. It was odd for her, she felt her heart thrashing violently against her ribcage, the adrenaline-or was it fear, either way she couldn't identify the sudden rush of, something she couldn't describe, run through her- his eyes held her own captive and seemed to have no intention of letting her go any moment soon. Natsu's eyes were almost-alluring to Lucy, she couldn't look away from the strong and blunt emotions present within him, she barely registered the hand wrapped around her wrist but even if she did it was likely there would be no reaction to the touch.

His breath caught in his throat as he stared at Lucy, her eyes wide with surprise, her lips slightly parted as if her words were just barely hanging on the tip of her tongue and yet not a sound came out, it was far from silent around them having children's screams ring throughout and strangers voices around them and yet it was a far cry to Natsu compared to the harsh beating of his heart ringing in his ears. He wanted to say something, anything but just like Lucy-his words were caught in his throat, he felt almost close to her as her guard fell slightly-most likely caught off guard with their interlocked eyes staring into the depths of the others, he was startled as well but his rapid pulse never allowed him time to sort his thoughts and in the next moment, the warmth of her wrist and breath pulled away at a distant shout.

"Oi! Bunny-Girl!" Natsu silently cursed the rather large student, he wanted to say something-he could have said something, not anything that could have broken every barrier between them but just taking down one would make his heart feel even a little lighter, but he lost his chance and it was cut shorter then what he thought it could have been by Gajeel Redfox, the blondes current best-friend. He watched as the pierced males red eyes travelled between the two of them before landing on his hand gripping firmly onto the blondes wrist, hastily he released it-immediately missing the sensation and warmth her skin provided.

When Natsu was first met the delinquent, who was currently glaring at him, he thought very poorly of him-not one thing that was considered a compliment could come out of his mouth if directed at Gajeel although now that he took the time to observe the male, he realized that the gruff person in front of him was not as abrasive as he originally thought. He noticed how his eyes penetrated his, searching for anything that would tell him if they're true and -most likely- any signs of deceit laying beneath his onyx eyes but Natsu was convinced he would find no such things-anything involving Lucy he was always fervid about.

"What's up Gaj?"

Watching as the male snapped out of his threatening daze, he answered, "Nothin' Bunny, just wondering where you guys were-you were just behind us last time I checked..." A small, angelic giggled startled Natsu into looking at the blonde who was smirking up at the red eyed man,

"Awe~ Were you worried Scrap Metal?" A snort was all she received in response but the pinkette assumed she was happy by the large grin plastered to her face, _'I used to do that,' _he thought almost bitterly as he followed three to whatever ride they would go on next, _'I used to make her smile, make her laugh, see the happy look in her eyes every time we spoke,' _his eyes trailed toward the blonde circling his thoughts and he laughed, running a calloused hand through his spiky locks, _'I guess I really screwed up didn't I?' _he sighed, _'but just how did I hurt her so badly?'_

Memories of his time away from Lucy surfaced in his mind as he questioned once again, what he did to hurt her enough to make her utterly despise him. Natsu couldn't remember a time that he didn't worry about her though, a moment when he didn't want her to be close or there in the crowd supporting him like she always had, he always loved her and to this very day he still did but whenever he went to say it the words would dissolve as if he was physically unable to do so, he knew he loved her and he was sure of it and yet he was still the coward who couldn't admit it to her face four years after they confessed to each other in the park.

"Lu-Chan! Let's go on the Ferris-Wheel!" Natsu glanced briefly at the excited glint in Levy's eyes, the young bookworm had always loved riding the Ferris-Wheel each time they came to the amusement park although Lucy also had an odd love for the long, peaceful ride but whenever she wanted to go on it had to be night, just as it was now. Silently, he watched the blonde glance up at the dark sky, the moon shining brightly above them before nodding in consent to her friends request, he chuckled- even though she argued against it, she was still the same Lucy deep down.

Neither male disagreed to riding the large wheel and walked behind the two animatedly speaking girls, excitement and joy alight in their eyes as the two talked about past moments of going on the Ferris-Wheel, although he an Gajeel stayed silent-neither of them having any reason to speak to other nor did they have any intentions of doing so anytime soon unless forced-but even then Natsu was skeptic of submitting to others pressure. His eyes narrowed at the tall male beside him, they seemed to be around the same height-maybe he was a little larger; Natsu unwillingly realized this and turned to gaze at Lucy.

The moment they shared between each other, it felt intense and sent shivers down his spine, he got to see what she was feeling in that moment and unlike his suspicions; she held no disgust, hate, or spite in her eyes as she stared at him only confusion and maybe even fear but as of what she was fearful of-he hoped not himself-Natsu had no clue. It was a feeling that he got every time he thought of Lucy, whenever he was near her or when she was spoken about, a familiar flutter in his stomach that made him feel uncomfortable and yet warm at the same time, this feeling he had-he didn't want to let go.

"..." As awkward as it was to walk alongside Gajeel, Natsu found himself grateful for the break to think-his thoughts were mixed and jumbled, there was no way he could say anything to anyone and he suddenly found himself relieved that he was unable to speak to Lucy earlier-he doubted he would ever be able to get his point across to her or convince her that he loved her, although Natsu had a sneaking suspicion she knew he still held strong feelings for her but chose to ignore them in-spite of herself. "... Y'know, I really don't like you," Natsu narrowed his eyes and glared defiantly at the male who grunted the rude words just a second ago,

"Good," he huffed indifferently, "the feelings mutual..."

"Gihi!"

"Gajeel! Natsu! C'mon, get in line with us!" The two groaned slightly before waiting in line, they would most likely get in after the Ferris Wheel stopped to let people off and new ones on, although they both preferred if they didn't have to go on but the boys would allow the girls to choose one last ride before they left seeing as it was around twelve thirty. Lucy felt a tap on her shoulder and turned to see Gajeel grinning at her anxiously with Levy close beside him-Natsu somehow finding his way beside her when their positions were originally switched.

"Bunny-Girl? Wanna ri-"

"Come on you two! Up you go!" before the young could finish his sentence, the blonde found herself being pulled onto the platform with Natsu at her side and the worker pulling them in front, she shrugged-whatever Gajeel had to say could probably wait until later although, she glanced at the salmon haired male beside her and silently groaned, why did she have to get stuck with the motion sick fuck up? Nodding to the worker in thanks as he closed the door to their seat she slid farther away from the already green-looking man and rested her elbow on the small ledge beside the window beside her face. Closing her eyes silently as she felt the ride move, she leaned her head against the glass and sighed-at least it was peaceful in the car, for now.

Silence, although nice every once in awhile was something Lucy often found herself loathing, it gave her time to think about unwanted things, it made her memories resurface and it made her feel completely and utterly alone. Pulling her warm sweater closer to her, she sought comfort in the warmth it provided and yet it didn't have the same effect that it did with when she was running, she laughed quietly-Natsu's groans never stopped as she thought bitterly, '_but that's all I've ever done, run', _she was a runner not a fighter like she liked to pretend, not like her friends thought, not like anyone who looked at her thought-they were wrong, all of them.

"mph-I-I'm sorry y-gah-ou had to ride t-his with some-urk-one you h-hate Luce-" broken words reached her ears and she pried her eyes open to see and extremely green Natsu staring at her with worried and depressed eyes-it was something uncommon to see on the always smiling Natsu Dragneel, she hadn't seen him look like this in a long while and she felt a lump form in her throat, and sighed before pushing his shoulders back so his head was leaning against the opposite window.

"...Don't fucking puke on me," he groaned quietly in response to her words and shut his eyes tightly-Lucy never did find someone else with motion sickness as severe as Natsu's although Gajeel did have it, his control and symptoms were far better than the pinkette's. Glancing over at him, she stared for a moment before narrowing her eyes and sighing, sliding over until her thy touched his as she did, and then-without thinking her actions through she leaned her head on his chest and closed her eyes, memories flashing through her mind.

"Lu-cy..?"

_'Why are you laying on my chest?'_

"Listen I-," she sighed, "I don't hate you okay..?"

_'Because you're comfortable and warm...'_

"..."

_'Ha! Yet you won't let me use your lap when I'm sick!'_

"I, I just can't trust you very much right now Natsu..."

_'Yeah, yeah... Natsu, I'm tired...'_

"But why?"

_'Ha! Lazy Lucy~!'_

"You need to find that out on your own," she sighed and rested her head over his heart, she always loved the sound-it calmed her as much as she hated to admit it but for now, she needed it.

_'Please~?'_

"I'll make it up to you Luce, I promise you..."

_'Go to sleep Luce...'_

Silently, Natsu wrapped his arms around her waist and laid them there, allowing the heat of her body to mix with his own as she listened to the rapid beating of his heart, forming a fist against her chest she sighed, there was a painful squeeze in her heart and whether it was from her impulse actions or something else, she had no clue.

All she knew was that the tug on her heart had it beating wildly with a bittersweet feeling left in her.

* * *

**Chapter 12**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_'-just to keep the tears from falling.'_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Well that's a rap guys! I hope enjoyed this chapter and are prepared for the storm that is soon to come! Thanks for all the reviews guys it means a lot to see that you're enjoying this so much, as I've said if you have any thoughts, questions or ideas feel free to review or PM me if you wish to! I will be going away for a week starting tomorrow or today whenever you get this notice by and then I will come back right after also thanks for those who have been voting in the poll on my profile its helping me determine which story you guys would be more interested in for me to publish first so thanks!****  
****Thanks for reading!****  
****Until Next time!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: I just got back from a trip, some parts of it were boring in which I had text Shattered-Nightmares712 to amuse me, secretly wishing she was here with me for I hold no comfort around a strangers presence and even if I was near a family member-I just really wanted to read but I resisted, until they could no longer see me O.O. Hopefully you guys enjoyed the fluff in this chapter that went on between Natsu and Lucy! ****  
****Thanks for reading!****  
****Bye!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	13. Chapter 12: Cold Air Coiled Over Warmth

**I have not updated in a while**

**Sorry about that!**

**I've been busy updating some other stories and working on future stories**

**so I completely forgot about updating this.**

**The story is really beginning to get good at this point**

**Because now the drama is coming in, more so than it already has.**

**Grade 10 is already tiring and I'm only in the first week of school so Fuck me!**

**Hopefully this chapter is interesting for you guys, **

**There will be some surprises so watch out!**

**Thanks for being so patient with me!**

**Let the drama begin!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_'Can I ever really trust you again-?'_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 12: Cold Air Coiled Around Warmth**

**~QOoOQ~**

Lucy glanced around the room tiredly; students were busying themselves with preparations for the school's Halloween dance which was approaching quickly much to her dismay. She sighed, lately she had been having moments where she would blank out for a reason she was too uncomfortable to explain to those who asked her which consisted of her friends and Natsu. The blonde would assure herself, it was just because of lack of sleep, there was no one after her, no little boy telling her to run, no fires burning down houses around her. Just lack of sleep.

That was all.

Maybe she was losing her mind? It was a high possibility, after all she had noticed her grades dropping since Natsu started hanging around her more, her IQ must have dropped plenty from just that. She groaned, who was she kidding? Something was wrong obviously but blaming it on her idiotic childhood friend would serve no purpose in her thoughts to figuring out what the small, vivid flashes in her mind were from. Had she seen a movie involving fire lately? That could be the cause.

No.

She hadn't.

A frustrated sigh left her lips, then what the Hell was going on? Lucy shook her head and shifted her thoughts onto something else, her mind wandered to the moment she shared with Natsu back behind Cana's bar, they had kissed, intensely, passionately and she was aware that she enjoyed every minute of it. She loved the feeling of being pressed against his firm body, the feeling of his calloused hands stroking her cheek, the sound of his heavy breaths but most of all, she loved the intense, half-lidded look he gave her, like she was the only girl he cared for, would treasure. _Loved_.

That's what she felt.

Her brown eyes stared blankly at the salmon haired singer from across the room, watching as he argued with Gray, should she trust him? It hurt to be near him, it hurt to hear him speak to her like they never had a gap of four years between them, it hurt to know he had no knowledge as to why she was bitter toward him, but it hurt more to be away from him. What she had told him that night about her last boyfriend was true, she had moved on-but not in the way she thought she had. She hadn't completely moved on from Natsu, the evidence was hung around her neck even in that moment.

A sudden nudge stopped her thoughts, "You alright Bunny?" She nodded at her friend as he came to sit beside her, there was no use and stressing him with her doubtful thoughts, "what are you thinking about?" She shrugged her shoulders, continuing her silence while her thoughts remained anything but, she could talk to Gajeel couldn't she? He could help her couldn't? He was one of her best friends, she could trust him.

"Gajeel?" He grunted, "can we talk later?" His blood red eyes travelled to meet her conflicted brown orbs, surely he had already realized something was off with her-when hadn't he? Lucy couldn't remember a time where he hadn't noticed something troubling her, it was just the matter of whether she chose to speak about it or not.

"Roof?"

She nodded, "roof." Her gaze turned back to Natsu, his goofy smile spread wide across his face, she wished she could be like him, to shake things off and be strong, but she wasn't, she found a way to cope but her way had cracks in it and it was all because of him.

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

She eyed the cigarette offered to her by her friend, tempted as she was, she refused. "So why'd you want to meet up here?" His red eyes observed her as she shifted uncomfortably, taking a sip of the drink clutched in her slender hands. Lucy seemed to be on edge and nervous-which was never really the case around him, "Bunny?"

She hesitated, "I'm not really even sure what's going on myself." The blonde laughed, she wanted to tell Gajeel what was on her mind, really she did but Lucy had no clue as to how to explain herself. She could bluntly tell him, the man she had despised the most was now causing the erratic beating of her heart every time they crossed paths. She could tell him that vivid dreams were haunting her conscious, the burning flames of fire always surrounding her.

She sounded insane didn't she?

Despite her thoughts she explained, "Is there something wrong with me Gajeel?" He raised a studded brown and puffed out smoke through his mouth, his bows furrowed.

"Why are you asking me this, Bunny?" Gajeel asked, "Did someone do something to 'ya? 'Cuz You know the Shrimp and I would beat the shit out of anyone who tried something."

She giggled, "No. Nothing intentional at least..." She raked a hand through her blonde locks before shaking her head, "It's Natsu. I-I can't stop thinking about him..." Lucy started, eyes looking away from her friend as she stared out at the sky, "I told him a little bit about what has happened since he was gone-not much but enough." She heard Gajeel still at her words before she continued, "after I told him... I kissed him and goddamn I cannot get it out of my head!" It irritated her to no end, she wanted to stop reacting him, wanted her heart to stop racing every time he was close to her, for her to stop getting closer to him.

But it hurt to stop.

"Lately I've noticed I'm starting to react more to him like I used to," she sighed. "My heart keeps racing and my palms get clammy and I can't calm down. I don't want to start feeling this way when I haven't even gotten over the reason I am mad at him!" They descended into silence, a light breeze cooling their cheeks as Lucy pulled her leather jacket tighter around her.

Mavis it was cold.

"Then forget him." Gajeel's response finally came; she snapped her head toward him and stared at him with wide eyes.

"You know I can't forget him Gaj," she said sadly. "It's not that easy."

"Then let me help you forget him!" He threw the cigarette bud on the ground before rolling over on top of her, holding himself up with his arms as he stared down at the blonde beauty beneath him. "I can make you forget him! I hate seeing you like this Bunny! You're the most important person to me and I'd be dammed if I let that _bastard_ Salamander hurt you again!" With that he dipped his head down and roughly placed his lips on hers.

What the hell was he doing? Lucy couldn't comprehend anything as Gajeel's chapped lips swiftly moved against her still mouth. Did he like her? No that couldn't be possible, they were friends, best friends and he had never shown an interest in her before besides she had seen the way Levy and he flirted.

Oh Mavis _Levy._

Her thoughts turned to her blue haired friend, a painful throbbing in her chest as she thought of Levy's confession about liking the pierced male currently kissing her. She couldn't do that to her friend. It just wasn't right. So with shaking arms she pushed at Gajeel's chest and watched as he slowly opened his eyes. "Gajeel…"

"Don't do this Bunny. Don't hurt yourself again, I hate watching it." His baritone voice reached her ears as his blood red eyes stared into her chocolate brown orbs. "I've loved you for so long but you haven't realized it, I could do so much better than Salamander, I can take care of you, I'll treat you right and I would never hurt you the way he did. Will you give me a chance Bunny?"

Oh Mavis why her? "Gajeel… I-I can't." He pulled away as she sat herself up.

"Why the fuck not!?"

She flinched, "I can't." Lucy repeated, "Levy…"

"What the fuck does the Shrimp have to do with this!?" She shook her head and he stood up, "You know what, whatever." He spat, another flinch. "Don't come fucking cryin' to me 'cuz Salamander broke 'yer heart again!" Her body trembled as his angered footsteps grew further away from her.

"Gajeel…"

**_*Slam!*_**

The tears spilled. "I'm so, _so_ sorry."

**_…_**

**"Screw fear, it's contagious**  
**Infecting everything**  
**It makes me do such stupid, stupid stuff**  
**I say things I never mean**  
**What exactly do I think?**  
**Who am I protecting?**  
**If I fall it'll blow up in my face**  
**That's just crazy**

**.**

**I'm delicate**  
**I'm sensitive**  
**Please try to be more careful**  
**You're mean**  
**You're a lunatic."**

Lucy gazed out at the crowd gathered in her friends bar, searching for her friend but of course he wouldn't come. Why would he? He was angry at her, she ignored the worried glance Levy sent her as she continued to strum on the guitar, singing her heart out. No! Lucy couldn't tell her. She couldn't do that to her friend and the fact that she had already hurt one was enough to send her into a guilt stricken fit.

**"Let's try to make this fun again**  
**It's only love, give it away**  
_(It's only love)_  
**You'll probably get it back again**  
_(It's only love)_  
**It's simple, it's a silly thing**  
**Throw it away like a boomerang**  
**I wish we all could lighten up**  
**It's only love, not a time bomb."**

Natsu. He was here, again it was nothing new anymore and quite frankly she wished he would go away for a little bit, she needed to sort herself out-he was gripping onto that kiss just as much as she was but for a different reason. Her lips tingled at the reminder as her hollow brown eyes set on his lips, Mavis she was an idiot.

Why did she always ruin everything?

**"I'm tired from last night's fight**  
**I wish I hadn't started it**  
**I hate when my fear speaks for me**  
**It makes me nasty**  
**I thought we could start again**  
**Go back to the days when we felt like friends**  
**It's all too serious for me**  
**And I know I'm guilty.**

**.**

**Matchsticks and poison**  
**That's what I add to the fire**  
**My dear, I'm frozen**  
**Turned from a saint to a liar."**

Her mind was still racing with thoughts of both Gajeel and Natsu. She couldn't deny her surprise at being confessed to by her best friend but she also couldn't agree to date him, she couldn't do that to hi, to Levy or herself. If she used him to forget Natsu then she would be hurting him because she knows she can't forget him and if she agreed to date him she would be hurting Levy.

She couldn't do that.

She didn't want to hurt them but she ended up hurting one of them anyway.

**"It's only love, give it away**  
_(It's only love)_  
**You'll probably get it back again**  
_(It's only love)_  
**It's simple, it's a silly thing**  
**Throw it away like a boomerang**  
**I wish we all could lighten up**  
**It's only love not a time bomb.**

**.**

**I don't want to be precious**  
**I don't want to feel stress**  
**Life is for the living, but not a living hell**  
**So take it**  
**Take this."**

She glanced toward her scarlet haired friend to see her laughing with Jellal. It had been a while since Simons death and Erza was still grieving the loss of her love but Lucy could see light returning to her eyes the more time she spent with her friends.

At least she hadn't ruined that.

**"Oh, you can have all of me**  
**Take it**  
**Take this**  
**Here, you can have everything**  
**I don't want to be flawless**  
**When I go I want the cuts to show**  
**So take it**  
**Take this**  
**Oh, you can have all of me**  
**Break it**  
**Take it**  
**Oh, fuck it, have everything!"**

She needed to talk to someone, not Levy of course for obvious reasons and she refused to talk to Erza, there was no need to dump her problems on the scarlet haired woman when she was already busy with her own. Maybe it would be best to just tell Natsu that the kiss had meant nothing. It was a mistake. Then he would stop hoping to get back together.

But then, did she really want it to be a mistake?

**"It's only love, give it away**  
_(It's only love)_  
**You'll probably get it back again**  
_(It's only love)_  
**It's simple, it's a silly thing**  
**Throw it away like a boomerang**  
**I wish we all could lighten up**  
**It's only love not a time bomb**  
_(It's only love)__  
__(It's only love)_  
**It's simple, it's a silly thing**  
**Throw it away like a boomerang**  
**I wish we all could lighten up**  
**It's only love not a time bomb."**

Cheers rang out through the bar and she smiled despite herself, "Thanks for coming out tonight!" Immediately she hopped off the stage and walked over toward the bar where Natsu and her other friends stat, faintly she could hear Levy calling to her in the background above the loud music but she chose to ignore her.

Ignore her. Don't say anything. Don't let her know.

Her pace sped up and before she knew it she was standing right in front of Natsu. Lucy grabbed his wrist and pulled him off the bar stool. "Luce?" He questioned.

"I need to talk to you." He nodded eagerness evident on his face. Oh Mavis he thought she was going to accept his feelings. She couldn't, she just couldn't do that. She dragged him outside the bar and immediately felt the cool air nipping at her exposed skin, suddenly she was regretting wherein a crop top. Bright flashes caught her attention and she was momentarily blinded by the light. "Natsu?" She turned to him when she felt him grip her wrist and pull her behind him.

"Paparazi? Damn!" What? She peered around him and saw the numerous flashes of cameras but what caught her attention was not the people behind them but the newspapers and magazines they were holding up. Each with a picture of her and Natsu kissing on the cover.

_"How long has this relationship been going on!?"_

_"Look over here!"_

_"Why have you not come out publicly with your relationship!?"_

She grit her teeth and glared at the cameras, pulling Natsu behind her as she shoved her way through the crowd. Damn them. It was her first time dealing with paparazzi and Lucy was glad that her career was not as successful as Natsu's at this point, having annoying cameras pointed at you when you just wanted some privacy.

Hurrying to the parking lot she maneuvered them through the cars to her motorcycle and tossed him her helmet. She hopped on and turned the engine on, watching as the paparazzi hurried into the parking lot to stop them and get their questions answered. "Get on." Lucy ordered him, he gave no objections as he climbed on behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. Her heart sped.

Damn him.

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**~QOoOQ~**

Lucy slowly came to a stop on her motorcycle and allowed her and Natsu to take a break, neither had been expecting to see paparazzi outside of Cana's bar, but then again they hadn't known someone had taken a photo of them kissing behind the bar either. She leaned into her hands and sighed, neither of them had moved from their spots on her motorcycle and she had nothing to complain about-she liked it, the feeling of his arms around her.

She felt warm.

"How the hell did they get that picture without us noticing?" Lucy questioned quietly, ignoring the heat that spread through her middle from the feeling of Natsu's arms wrapped around her. She felt his arms raise a little in what she assumed to be a shrug.

"No clue…" He answered, "Although I guess that explains why they hadn't been pestering me lately-they wanted to watch my normal life, see if I had a girlfriend which they have clearly titled you as." She snorted, rolling her pretty eyes.

"Yeah," she said, sarcasm dripping from her tone. "Were are nothing even close to that. They are just mistaken is all." She felt Natsu flinch but she wouldn't take back her words. Push him away Lucy. It's for the best. Keep him at a distance. Hurt him a little but it will be better in the long run. He stiffened before she felt his front lean against her back, his lips just barely brushing against the shell of her ear.

_Bastard._

"Now, you aren't exactly telling the truth," he whispered breathily in her ear, oh Mavis was his voice always this deep? She felt his arms briefly tighten around her and it suddenly became apparent how intimate their position was, "what about that kiss we shared the other night? I'm sure that's not something friends would do." No. He was right. No friend would have a full blown make-out session with the other, unless they did the whole _'friends with benefits'_ thing but even then that was beyond friends.

They were not lovers.

Anything but.

She shivered at the feeling of his hot breath fanning against the back of her neck. When had he taken the helmet off and damn why did she decide to wear her hair up today? Tension coiled in her stomach the closer he got. The irritating butterflies in her stomach fluttered with every brush of his lips on her flushed skin. It suddenly felt a little too warm for mid October. What happened to the chilliness of the night?

_It disappeared the moment he pulled himself closer to me_, she answered herself stiffly. Lucy felt Natsu kiss the back of her neck lightly, damn him he knew her neck was sensitive-he _knew _everything about her.

Just not the new her.

Lucy found herself relaxing slightly in his arms, she knew she needed to fight it-really it was the smartest option but her body had ignored the logical side of her brain and followed the desires swimming within her. Should she really be doing this? She found herself wondering if what they were doing was right, he would only get hurt in the end.

So would she.

His lips kissed the side of her temple, "I really missed you Lucy." _Yeah_, she thought sourly_, clearly you had shown that over the years_. A bitter taste entered her mouth at the sudden reminder, what was she doing? Chapped skin pressed against her cheek, he was closer to her mouth now-should they really be doing this? It was so warm now.

Where had the cold gone?

Lucy found her head turning to the side slightly, she could see a bit of his face, he looked content kissing her skin-was it really that enjoyable_? Of course it was_, she felt a part of herself defending him. His lips were closer now, just at the corner of her mouth; his thumb was lazily gliding across her exposed stomach. A soothing feeling. She felt at home. Safe. Her eyes fluttered, half-lidded; her heart leaped as his lips connected with hers.

His lips moved slowly against hers, it was gentler, softer than the way Gajeel had kissed her on the rooftop earlier and she found herself enjoying the sensation immensely. He wasn't suggesting anything, there was no use of the tongue, and no sensual movement from his hands-it was just the fluid movements of their lips together. He cupped her face tenderly and tilted her head to the side to ease the strain on their necks.

Natsu lightly nibbled on her bottom lip, tugging on the soft flesh between his teeth as he separated from her mouth. A breeze passed them but Lucy refused to open her closed eyes, afraid that what she would see was not in fact what she had felt-she was eager, she wanted more but the gentle way he held her face and tenderly ran his thumb along her cheek held her back. This was something she wanted since that day four years ago. It was so warm in his arms.

Where was that coldness?

Her eyes opened slowly, staring into his sharp but warm looking onyx eyes. Natsu was looking at her like she was a rare treasure that he would never find again if he lost it. Was this how he felt? His face was coming closer, his eyes beginning to close slightly and she found herself leaning into him too, she couldn't help it. His warmth was so welcoming and she loved how safe she felt with him coiled around her, keep her warm and safe. Fuck she wanted it to always be like this. His lips brushed against Lucy's, teasing her, daring her to close that gap left between them. Should she?

She nuzzled into his hand, leaning forward and reconnected their greedy lips. She only felt warmth now so why was that voice brining in the chill?

"Natsu?"

They stopped. "…Lissanna?!"

The cold was back.

* * *

**Chapter 13**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_._**

**_'-I am thinking it's harder to stay away.'_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Again so sorry for the late update, so Lissanna has finally entered, Stroke-of-Midnight87727 has wanted drama to start for the longest time and now it is finally starting! Thank you so much for your patience with me, I have been busy with getting ready for school and trying to prepare other chapters that updating _Scream's of the Past_ just totally slipped my mind. Next update should be _White Tinted Black_! ****The song used in this is **_**Timebomb**_** by P!nk! I threw in a little GaLu but it was for a good reason so do not get mad at me for putting it in because this is a NaLu indefinitely! ****Thank you for the reviews! Hope you enjoyed it!  
Until next time!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: Hey again! I'm excited to see what Shattered-Nightmares712 has in store for us! Lissanna is obviously going to stir up some drama as she does in most FanFiction's but anyway hope that this is getting a little more interesting than before. What do you think Lucy is seeing? What's Lissanna going to be like? What happened all those years ago? Wait for the next update to find out more! Let us know what your thoughts about Gajeel were! It was an unplanned scene but we found it necessary anyway!****  
****Thanks for reading!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	14. Halloween Special

**Hey everyone! So**

**I decided to do a Halloween special**

**for all of you and here it is!**

**Honestly Halloween must be my favorite time of the year**

**and no, not because of the candy.**

**I don't eat the candy I get-I give it to my friends.**

**I like it because my birthday is the day before Halloween **

**and because I like being scared!**

**So, maybe this may not be scary to some of you**

**but I tried my best!**

**Have a Happy Halloween!**

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_'Shadows of a thousand years rise again unseen-'_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Halloween Special**

**~QOoOQ~**

"I don't even understand why we are here..." Lucy sighed in exasperation as Natsu pulled on her was tired as Hell which is a reasonable feeling considering her friends and Natsu had come over to her house and grabbed Erza and herself before driving to an abandon mansion at two in the morning. To say the least, she was annoyed. "Are you all that scared that you needed to drag Erza and I along with you?"

Natsu shook his head and glanced back at her. "Nah, it's Halloween Luce! The guys and I decided we should get into the groove of things and come to a creepy building."

"And why did that lead to bringing us along with you?"

Loke leaped beside her, arms spread open. "So you can jump in my arms and allow me to protect you, my love!" She shook her head and rolled her eyes. He was relentless. Didn't even stop flirting despite the fact that they were cousins.

"Shut up Loke." She looked to Natsu. "So why was I dragged here?"

He shrugged. "Figured you weren't doing anything for Halloween so we brought you along."

"Princess, I am hurt that you took my love so lightly-"

"Natsu, at two in the morning? Nobody should be up that late on Halloween!" When he merely shrugged Lucy just sighed and glanced over at Gajeel and Levy. Both of her friends had come along, a little on the unwilling side, Levy-she hated being scared but agreed because Gajeel had grumpily joined.

**_…_**

"Erza, I'm not too sure splitting up was the best idea. This place doesn't sit right with me…" The red haired woman looked back at Jellal as he looked around behind her.

"Why? Are you afraid?" She teased. "It was your idea in the first place to come here…"

"Actually it was Loke and Natsu's idea…"

"And yet here you are. You're a part of this too Jellal, you can't just blame the idiots of the band." He laughed and shook his head. Maybe he was just being paranoid or something that was probably why he had an odd feel. Nothing was going to happen. "Besides if anything does happen, ill protect you!"

"That sounds like something I should be saying to you…"

"Why? Women are perfectly capable of doing what men do."

"Yes and I know that women can. Some more than others," he smirked at her. "I just think it'd be nice to protect you for once."

"…I'll be fine."

He shook his head. Erza was oblivious, but that was just one of the things he adored about her.

* * *

**_"When you hear the banshee's shrill cry..."_**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

"Loke get your fucking ass out of my face…"

"Dude how do you do that!?" Macbeth cracked an eye open and stared at the rear end of his flirtatious band-mate.

"Do what?"

"Know that something is in your face and exactly what it is!?" Loke asked in astonishment and a hint of suspicion. "Last time you guess it when my face was close to yours and now you knew that my ass was near your face!"

"Because last time I could smell the cat-nip on your breath and this time your ass smelt like fucking shit!"

"You-!"

"Come on guys, settle down." Gray popped up between them and patted their shoulders. "Macbeth you can't tell a cat-man that his breath smells like cat-nip or his ass smells like shit-and yeah Loke go brush your teeth man, but you also know not to disturb him when he's got his eyes closed Loke."

"Shut up." Loke glanced down at his friend. "Where are your fucking clothes Gray!?"

"Fuck!"

"If you're trying seduce the idiot and I, it's not working very well dude. Considering we don't swing that way, well_… I_ don't."

_"Fuck you Macbeth!"_

**_…_**

The place was eerily quiet. Lucy crossed her arms over her chest and glanced around the large mansion. "Natsu, why did you have to bring us here?" Honestly the whole plan was ridiculous. There were no such things as ghosts so why would they come all the way to some old, abandoned mansion just to look for something that held no existence on earth.

"Because were searching for ghosts Luce! And its Halloween!" He smiled back at her and moved the lantern around to look at the furniture in the library. Millions of books littered the shelves and Natsu was surprised his blonde friend hadn't already begun to freak out. He knew she loved books-she still did, he had caught her almost devouring a book in their schools library even though she denies such an act.

* * *

**_"A person high-born will die..."_**

* * *

"What the hell was that!?" Gray yelled as he saw the two teens running towards them.

"How the hell should we know!?" Lucy retorted, glaring steadily at her friend. She could feel her heart beating against her ribcage and she was short of breath. Mavis she didn't want to be here. Her brown eyes roamed over each pair of faces in the room. Everyone was there. Who the hell screamed? Erza stepped forward.

"Someone must be in trouble, we should help them." Leave it to Erza to do the just thing.

"In here!?" Levy squawked in disbelief. "We'll never find them in time if they really are in trouble!" Jellal nodded at the girl, none of them really knew the layout of the building and they would be going in blind if they searched for the owner of the scream.

"She's right; we wouldn't be able to cover everything if we went." He paused and looked around at everyone. "Maybe we should split up..."

"Nope!" Loke chirped and turned toward the front door. "No way in Hell am I doing that." He continued to approach the opened door with languid steps as his friends protested behind him. He was not going to go on a wild goose chase in a large mansion for someone they heard scream. He doubted it was even that. To him it sounded more like a cat screeching.

**_*Bang!*_**

"You know on second thought I think it would be safer to be with you all!" He spun around on his heel and almost ran toward them while the others just stared at the now closed door behind him. Lucy scoffed.

"What are you all gaping about?"

"Luce, the door-"

"Yeah, it was the wind. Can't you guys hear it from here?" She pointed to the closed window, the tree branches swaying violently from side to side. "Mavis you are all so jumpy." She rubbed at her arms and glared at the pinkette beside her, "Can we just find the girl and go home? I want to leave this place; it's stupid to come here just for Halloween."

**_…_**

"What the fuck is this shit!?" Levy peered around her burly partner in confusion until her eyes lay upon the multiple candles and red liquid smeared across the floor. Cautiously she walked out from behind him and inspected the image. "It looks like some satanic shit.

"That's because it is."

"What!?"

"Someone made this recently, its part of a ritual to call out evil spirits from the spirit world…" She explained briefly, her concentration centered on the pentagram.

"…How do you know all this."

"Dated a college guy a while ago." She shrugged her shoulders. "He was into this kind of stuff, I dumped him after the first 'ritual'." Gajeel glanced at her, shifting from his position against the wall.

"You dated a college guy?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "He was kind of a stupid one too. I regret it." Levy stood and turned to him with a hard look on her face. "We should go warn the others." She started to head for the door as Gajeel stared after her.

"You don't actually believe in that shit, do you?" Her steps paused and she turned her head to the side slightly so he couldn't see her face.

"You don't know what force can come out of this Gajeel; it could be as innocent as a fly or as dangerous as Zeref himself."

* * *

**_"A murder quite often..."_**

* * *

**~QOOOQ~**

They didn't end up leaving

She rubbed at her arms furiously trying to get rid of the chill creeping up on her. She couldn't understand how it was so warm moments before and now it was freezing cold, so much that her breath was showing up in puffs of white smoke. Her eyes roamed around the eerily quiet, the only sounds being her shuddering breaths and Natsu's footsteps walking around the room. Lucy doubted anyone was in this room, they would at least hear muffled whimpering or _see something_.

There cannot just be silence.

She blew on her hands and rubbed them together to get the warmth back in them. Mavis it was fucking cold. Suddenly she felt weight drop onto her shaking shoulder and looked to the side to see a large black jacket covering her torso. Lucy looked over at her partner and saw Natsu turn away from her mumbling, "Just take it. You're going to get sick."

She didn't reply but was secretly grateful for the new warmth his jacket provided her. "Have you found anything?" She asked Natsu, walking behind him as she slipped her arms through the sleeves. He glanced back at her before turning away and shaking his head.

"Nothing yet..." None of the dust had been disturbed in the room and there were no other evident footsteps on the dirty floor other than their own so it was obvious no one had entered the room since they arrived there. "I don't think anyone's in here Luce…"

"No shit, there would have at least been _some _kind of give-away…" She turned on her heels and started walking to the door on the opposite side of the room. "Come on, we haven't checked in here yet and the sooner we get this over with the sooner we can get out of here." Lord did she want to leave so badly but she wouldn't do it without her friends.

And she supposed Natsu too.

He nodded and followed after her, his heavy steps sounding behind her. She could hear small, occasional squeaks every once in awhile. Her head started to pound from the constant noises. She groaned in frustration and turned to look at him. "You know with how heavy you're walking no one will be able to hear anyone scream…"

"Luce what are you talking about?"

"You're loud footsteps." She glared at him. "It sounds like a fucking elephant walking around in here." His brows furrowed together and his lips turned into a tight line.

"I haven't been walking Lucy; I've been riding this bike I found." She blinked at him before looking at him again. He was, indeed, riding an old-fashioned bike which explained the squeaking noise she kept hearing-the thing need to be oiled.

"Then who did I hear-" She shook her head and turned away from him, speeding her pace up. "Never mind, let's just hurry up." She heard him hop off the bike before hurriedly following after her and into the next room. It was darker than the one they were in before, unlike this room the other had lighter walls and opened windows while this one had dark purple walls and closed windows with black curtains covering them. It held a gloomy feeling to it and she hated the way it looked. "Come on…"

She started to shuffle through the room, searching around the desks and the multiple chairs scattered across the room, occasionally coming across a broken china doll. Lucy had to admit that those dolls were not the creepiest thing she had seen that night. The coffin lying in the center of the room, illuminated by a light had to be the most disturbing sight she had seen that night.

"What the fuck?"

* * *

**_"Is what fill's the coffin..."_**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

"Why the fuck is there a coffin in here!?"

"How should I know!?"

"It was a rhetorical question Natsu…"

"Why did you even ask it if you didn't want me to answer it!? And what the hell is a _ritercal_ question?"

"Oh my Mavis Natsu! You're fucking nineteen years old! Learn something! Besides we don't have time for an English lesson nor do I have the patience to deal with your stupidity." He pouted and watched as she approached the coffin. Almost to the point where she could see in it.

"Uh, Luce? You sure you should be doing that?"

She reached over the edge of the black casket and looked back at him. "It's fine Na_-aaaaaah_!" She froze midsentence and shrieked loudly. Natsu's heart thudded in his chest and his face went white. What the hell was in there that it could make Lucy cry out like that?

"Lucy!" Her cries turned into quiet giggles before she doubled over, holding her stomach as he body shook. "What the…?"

"Did you really think there was something in there? Mavis you're gullible Natsu." She asked him, shaking her head before finally looking in the coffin. "Look there is nothing-" She stopped herself abruptly and her face went pale. Her were hands shaking as they hovered in the air. She looked as if she was extremely ill but Natsu didn't believe her.

"I'm not falling for that one again Luce," he shook his head. "You can't use that trick twice in a minute. It won't work." But she didn't move. She just stared, her wide eyes fixated on the interior of the morbid object. "Come on Luce…" He walked toward her and gripped her arm. "We need to keep- Mavis Lucy your freezing!" He wrapped his large palms around her slender wrists and looked down in the coffin beside her.

Inside it was a young girl, her cheeks pale and caved in, dark circles under her eyes. The little girl had long brown hair flowing out beside her, her hands positioned of her stomach covered by a short black dress. She looked like a beautiful china doll, almost like a human replica of the dolls scattered around the room. "N-Natsu…"

"…This isn't real, Luce. It's just some sick prank."

"Natsu I swear if you-"

"It wasn't me! Look I'll prove there is nothing going to happen, ill even touch it." He hovered his finger over the girl face before prodding her cheek. Suddenly, his finger sunk in and blood spilled from the spot his finger had gone in, maggots squirming their way out of its food. His clean hand slapped over his face. He barely registered the sound of Lucy puking in the background as he watched the girl's small coffin fill with her blood. "Oh my Mavis!"

He whipped around and pulled on Lucy's hand, not waiting for her to stop spilling her dinner all over the floor and raced out of the room just as a scream echoed from behind them. He refused to look back. Refused to turn around and see just what made that scream. "Lucy? Are you okay?" He was breathing hard; his heart hammering into his chest, the adrenaline rush he felt was slowly dying as he kept running. She said nothing. "Luce?"

**_…_**

Lucy propped her arm on the wall as she finished spilling the contents of her stomach onto the floor. Mavis what kind of sick prank was that? What kind of sick prank was that? She remembered seeing Natsu's horrified expression as his finger sunk into the girl's skin. He hadn't done it so what twisted fucker would do that? She had thought it to be a realistic mannequin but that thought had quickly been erased as soon as she saw the maggots squirm out from the flesh. They wouldn't have been alive had they not been feeding off of human flesh. Mavis she felt like throwing up again. Who would leave the dead body of a girl in a coffin at an abandoned mansion?

Lucy wiped her mouth off with a grimace and looked around the dimly lit hall. Great, the lights are broken. She was surrounded by lights but the other half of the hallway that continued to where their meeting spot was had been incased in darkness. She just wanted to go home. She glanced at the hallway then behind her, weighing her options. She could either join the dead girl in the coffin and whatever thing screamed or walk down a dark, creepy hallway.

Naturally she chose the hall.

She took one-step before she heard the sound of footsteps in front of her. Perhaps it was Gray or even Natsu looking for her, possibly Gajeel considering how heavy they were. She paused. Maybe it was neither of them. She had heard heavy footsteps earlier when she was with Natsu and it wasn't him walking. Her body froze in place and she squinted against the darkness. She could see the outline of a tall, stiff-looking figure. "Who's there!?

"Lucy…" She stiffened and her eyes darted to the face of the figure as they took a step closer allowing their faces to be reflected on what little light the moon provided in the darkness.

"Dad!? What the hell are you doing out of jail!?"

He smiled eerily at her. "Lucy, I am our father." Jude told her and took a few steps closer. "Come to the dark side… of the hallway." She gave him a strange look. Was he drugged or something? She had no fucking clue what was wrong with him but he was spouting distorted lines from a movie and she was not interested in hearing or seeing what he was going to do next. She slowly back away as she pointed behind her.

"Yeah I think I'm just going to go that way with the dead girl…" She dashed away from her quickly approaching father, turning at the corner of the hall. Mavis Jude was fast. What was that? The carpet was pulled back from the ground to uncover a small door in the floor, yes! She could hide there. She scampered down the hatch and covered it as best she could with the carpet before running under. She could barely crouch within it and it was hard to breath from the dust circulating the air.

Lucy crawled around on the floor, making sure to not be under the hatch when her father ran by. She could hear his heavy but swift footsteps run overhead and waited a moment with baited breath. He was gone. She let out a sigh of relief and reached into her back pocket for her lighter. Lucy ripped out the lighter and toyed with it for a moment before the flicker of the flame came on and she looked down only to cry out in terror.

* * *

**_"Then under the turf he will lie..."_**

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

She let out a loud screech as she stared face to face with the rotted corpse underneath her. She could see the bugs crawling under the dead person's skin, the spiders inching across its face. The body was so distorted she could hardly tell whether it was a man or women but the size told her it was a young child. She felt bile rise in her throat. No time for throwing up! She frantically crawled away from the corpse and toward the ladder that led to the hatch. It was stuck!

Oh Lord, she was trapped. Lucy's fists pounded on the door, she'd rather join her father on the darker side of the hallway than be stuck with a child's corpse! _"Help! Natsu! Gray! Guys!" _She swiped at the tears rolling down her face. She was scared. Mavis she hated the feeling of fear. The feeling of being powerless. It _sucked_. Giggling sounded behind her and her body stiffened. Chills ran up her spine as she slowly turned her head to see the corpse sitting up straight, head tilted awkwardly to the side and a spider slowly crawling out of its parted mouth.

Again she could feel the bile rise and her stomach flip. How could it be doing that? It was dead, she had been on top of it and bugs crawled under its skin, its skin cold as ice and yet it had no reaction so how was it giggling and sitting straight up? The corpse shifted positions so its legs were parallel to its shoulders helping it stay kneeled along with its hands as they lied flat on the ground. It almost looked demonic.

Either way she didn't care.

She wanted the fuck out! Lucy let another loud scream and her banging became more frantic and desperate as the corpse started to move toward her_. "Play with me! Play with me! Lady, why do you hate me?" _It sounded like a boy's voice. Her body was trembling. She just wanted to get out; she never wanted to come with everyone she wanted to leave. Now she was stuck under the house with a demonic corpse that was moving closer to her. _"Play with me! Play with me! Lady, why do you hate me?"_

"Natsu!" Her eyes shut tight as the sound of the hatch opening. Was it her father? She felt warm arms wrap around her and pull her out before she finally felt carpet beneath her body. Her brown eyes opened cautiously as she peered at her savior.

"Are you okay Lucy!? We heard you screaming!" Relief rushed through her and the tears ran down her face relentless as she flung herself onto him. Never had she been gladder to see him. He returned her hug and held the back of her head to his chest, "Lucy what happened to you? I'm sorry I let you leave on your own." She just shook her head when the giggling started up again and quiet banging came from the hatch.

"Just go! Please!" He nodded and tugged her close to him, the sound of the little boys giggling resounding around them.

_"Play with me! Play with me! Lady, why do you hate me?"_

They ran until they were outside where their friends waited for them in their vehicles. Immediately they ran into the cars and ignored their friend's curious questions before telling them to drive. It was only when they started to pull out of the driveway that Lucy started to relax. "Princess what happened in there?"

"…I saw my dad." Having already been informed about what happened prior to hers and Natsu's separation the four friends stared at her in surprise before Loke spoke up.

"Uncle Jude?" She nodded. "Why was he there?"

"I don't know but he seemed drugged or something, either way I don't care." Natsu looked at her, rubbing her arms soothingly to help calm her down.

"Was that why you were calling for help."

"No!" She denied. "I got away from him and then got locked in that basement, I ended up using my lighter to find my way out but I found another corpse, but this time when I tried to get out and found it was locked… it moved."They looked at her strangely. "I'm not joking."

"Are you sure he was dead?" Natsu asked."

"Yes." Lucy stared at him dead in the eye. "He started chanting something and I- it was too much for me to handle all in one night."

"Lucy," Erza looked at her from the front passenger seat. "Levy informed us that she and Gajeel had found some satanic ritual in the top floor of the building maybe that could be the cause of some of the things that had happened tonight?" Perhaps, but either she didn't care, as long as they were out of that house unharmed. He sighed and looked down at his feet.

"Sorry Luce, I thought this would be fun but we all ended up getting scared shitless by some idiot…" She shook her head lamely and turned to look out the back window.

"Its fine, Natsu. Let's just forget about it okay?" Two figures walked out of the large front door to the mansion, it was something that would forever haunt her as she watched the young boy and girl slowly walk out of the building before stopping just where their car had been parked and tilting their heads to the side and waving at her.

**_…_**

The twins looked at each other before looking back at the retreating vehicle. The pretty lady was watching them; they could sense her fear even from there. The smiled hollowly. "Tonight is the night children get scared and are lost. Be safe tonight for it is Halloween!"

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_._**

**_'-Their voices whisper in the trees, "Tonight is Halloween!"'_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shattered-Nightmares712: Hopefully that spooked you a little bit! As a small note, none of this actually affects the story, Jude is not out of Jail, and Lissanna is still there waiting for the next chapter to begin. So just remember that. What are you all dressing up as? I just turned fifteen yesterday so i might be a little old but I'm going out as a court jester! I used quotes all throughout the story which I found on Google images, I find a lot of quotes there, it's like a quote Heaven!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	15. Chapter 13: Hello there Daddy

**Wow**

**I have not updated this since October.**

**Well**

**finally you get to see a bit more of Lissanna in this chapter.**

**This story is coming together, only one more surprise before**

**we can start closing all the problems and mending broken bonds.**

**Anyway,**

**Thank you for all of your reviews and support!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_'It's easier to say that you're mad-"_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Chapter 13: Hello there Daddy**

**~QOoOQ~**

Perhaps it was the previous incident with the reporters she and Natsu still hadn't spoken about that had her in a bad move or maybe it was the fact that she was seated on her motorcycle, stunned after having a much missed kiss with Natsu as some chick walked up to them and called his name, someone he seemed to know well. Lucy glared behind her at Natsu who gave her a side glance before looking at the woman he called _'Lissanna",_ it wasn't like she didn't know who the girl was-she would have to be in a hole for years to _not_ know who Lissanna Strauss is. The girl in question is extremely beautiful, Lucy had to admit it.

She was curvy much like herself, short, white hair and dazzlingly blue eyes-she seemed like one of those delicate and prissy girls that Lucy lived around, definitely not someone she would typically enjoy the company of. Lissanna Strauss was known for her modelling career along with her sister and brother Mirajane and Elfman Strauss, she was always in the tabloids and magazines around Magnolia although one thing she didn't know was the fact that she and Natsu were close.

"Uh..." Natsu stuttered dumbly, scratching the back of his head. "Lissanna what are you doing here?" She smiled sweetly at him and walked closer to their spot on Lucy's motorcycle.

"We're doing a shoot here in Magnolia so I decided to come here." She pouted slightly, "why? Didn't you miss me?" He chuckled and hopped off the bike and wrapped her in a hug. Lucy averted her eyes. She didn't want to see this, hadn't they just been kissing seconds before? No, she needed to calm down, she couldn't assume things. Or could she? Did he just kiss her on a whim? She needed to stop thinking for once.

"Of course I did, haven't seen you in awhile..." _Meanwhile you hadn't seen me, your supposed to be 'lover' for four years._

As if suddenly noticing her presences Lissanna looked at her. "Oh! Who's this?" She looked to him, "Natsu? Will you introduce me?"

"Oh ah, Lucy this is my friend Lissanna, I met her while I was touring. Lissanna-this is Lucy my-"

"Friend." She interrupted him. _Shit! What did I just say!? _Maybe it made sense though, would she kiss the person she hates? But she didn't hate him, she never did no matter how much she wanted to she couldn't but right now all her anger was directed toward Lissanna. Why though? She couldn't be protective of someone she wasn't even dating.

"Well it's nice to meet you!" She turned to Natsu. "We should catch up..."

"Now?"

"Yeah, why not?"

"Well, I'm with Luce right-"

"No you're not." She interrupted him again, pulling her helmet over her head. "I'm going to head home, you go catch up with your friend." He looked at her with a confused look, obviously he wanted to say something about their earlier actions but she wouldn't let him as she revved up the engine and took off. She didn't need to stay there and listen to Lissanna talk to him about how much time they spent together and how they should 'catch up'. She growled in frustration. Fuck did she need a drink. Maybe she would call up Gajeel and see if he would-wait, she couldn't.

Things had been awkward with her and her best friend ever since he had confessed to her. Lucy couldn't stand being in his presence alone for more than a few minutes before the silence got to her. It wasn't a weird way to act was it? It's odd to know your best friend has a crush on you, or at least, that's how Lucy thought although she doubted no one thought like that. She needed to talk to someone, Erza wouldn't do; she has her own problems, she couldn't ask Levy because Levy doesn't drink and Lucy would probably spill her guts to the woman, including the bit about Gajeel liking her.

Maybe...

Yeah, she would go there.

**_…_**

Natsu stared at the back of the blondes' motorcycle as she raced off into the night. He couldn't believe she just left him, he hated wanted to talk about their actions earlier, see if there was any chance for him to get back together with her but she left. His mind reeled back to the kiss they shared, Mavis had he missed her being in his arms, he wanted to be able to hold her whenever he wanted, to kiss her and show her how much he loved her. Because, despite her hatred towards him, he still loved her so much that he felt like his heart was going to be ripped out of his chest any moment.

"Natsu?" He almost forgot about her. "There's a fast-food place close by, why don't we go there and get something to eat and catch-up?" His eyes didn't leave from their focus on the road in front of him for a moment before he slowly looked back at her and nodded.

"Yeah, sure." Although he did want to catch up with his friend, he wanted to be with Lucy more than anything in that moment.

* * *

**~QOoOQ~**

She always hated coming here-_despised_ it in fact. Although she kept coming back despite her own better judgement, but when did she ever take the safe road with things? Maybe before everything had gone to shit but she wanted to come back here. Maybe it was because her only relative remained within the building or perhaps she was still clinging a bit onto her old self. She felt the latter was correct. Lucy noticed as of recently, some of her old self was coming back, sure she was still a little rough around the edges, and she doubted that would ever change but her friends have even noticed a softer side to her coming out.

Lucy wondered if Natsu had anything to do with her recent change, actually, she was almost positive that her had something to do with her new attitude. Ever since he came back, sure there were her spouts of anger, how couldn't she when Natsu had screwed up their relationship so much? But, something within her wanted her to forgive him, wanted to give him another chance but she was holding herself back from doing just that. Lucy paused a moment as she entered the building. Why_ is_ she holding herself back? She suddenly felt self-conscious about herself, this wasn't like her at all, the old her would have dropped everything and forgiven him within the amount of time he had been there so far, maybe it was because the cut was so deep that it was harder for her to forget it.

She touched her lips hesitantly, thinking back to their kiss just a little while earlier, Mavis she fucking missed him, the way he would hold her, the way his eyes looked at her with that warmth she just loved, and most of all she missed just him being here next to her without any tension between them, carefree and in love. That's how they used to be. And Lucy wanted that now. "Who are you here to visit?" Lucy snapped out of her thoughts and looked up at the woman at the front desk, she smiled bitterly,

"Ah, Jude Heartfilia." The lady nodded and said a few words to the guards before they led her away to another section of the building where her father was being held. She could still remember the way to the visitation areas despite how long it had been since she had gone to see her father, she hadn't had much time to go down and visit amidst the chaos of her childhood friends coming back to town. She wondered how he was doing. Perhaps she shouldn't even bother to think of him or give him the time of day but, she still did. Lucy quickly arrived to the visiting room and sat alone at one of the tables for only a moment before her father's was brought in and was seated across from her. "Father." She nodded.

"Lucy," he observed her. "Why have you come to visit? It's been a few months since the last time you came here."

"I've been busy." She replied shortly. "Natsu came back to town as of recently," her father gave her a brief surprised look before sighing.

"The boy you were dating a few years back?" When she nodded, he asked her, "How have things been going with him? Caught up yet?" She hesitated to tell him before glancing away.

"Sort of," she shrugged. "It's complicated, I haven't spoken with him for so long and we're just, different then what we were. _I'm_ different." She sighed and shifted in her seat, "How have you been?"

"Good, I should be let out in a few years, maybe sooner with parole and some community service work." He told her briefly, not going too in-depth on the subject, "How have you been doing in school? Anything exciting happen recently?"

"Schools been okay, same grade average as last time I came to visit," She shrugged. "I had to do a duet with Natsu for music class."

"How did that go?"

"Alright, I guess. The song was god and we harmonized well, his singing has gotten better." She added cheerfully,, leaving out the part of where she ran from the room.

"I'm sure it has." Silence fell over them like a blanket, they had nothing to speak about again, well Lucy did have questions that she still needed answers to but she doubted her father would answer them well enough that she could stop thinking about it.

"Father?" She called hesitantly, "can you tell me why yet?" He sighed,

"Lucy, we've spoken about this..."

"But you've never given me a straight answer," she protested. "I just need to know why you would sell them that-deliberately knowing what they would do with those chemicals-"

"I did not know where they would plant it Lucy, nor did I know who they would do this to!" He huffed, "Besides there were reasons behind what I did, had there not of been I have no doubt in my mind that your mother would have left me and taken you."

"A reason doesn't make up for what we've lost, Father."

"No, it doesn't, but I don't know what to tell you Lucy."

"Tell me the truth."

"I have been."

"The whole truth, Father," she shook her head. "You've only been telling me the half of it, why can't you just tell me why-?"

_"Because they would have taken you!"_ His voice boomed and he looked away from her before seating himself back down on the chair so as not to alert the guards of his slowly rising anger. "Because, Lucy, they would have taken you had I not given them the necessary chemicals for what they were going to do."

"So you put hundreds of lives on the line just for mine?" When he said nothing, she continued, "and it was for the reason of saving me that we lost my brother to those people?" Again, he said nothing, only lowered his head more. "Oh my God." Lucy leaned back in her seat, her head between her hands.

"I'm so sorry Lucy, I-I didn't know what to do, I panicked."

"You couldn't have told the police?'

"No, they were watching Lucy, they would have been able to know had I contacted anyone." He sighed, "they're locked up now, Lucy, they cannot do anymore harm. They have no option of parole and they have a life sentencing."

"So it was my fault?"

"Lucy, no-"

"My brother is _gone_, because_ I_ was their target?" Tears were welling up in her eyes as she processed the information her father had just given her, the brother she refused to think about for so many years after he had disappeared that night their town was attacked, was the person she should have been remembering since he disappeared so as to remember she was part of the reason for his disappearance.

"You listen to me right now," Jude took her shaking hands in his, it had been so long since he had seen his daughter so upset, the last time he could remember her guard being down was when his wife had died. "None of those lives that were taken that night were your fault, the fault is in the hands of their captor and killer, and they are serving their punishment as we speak."

"But he wasn't found." Lucy shook her head, "D-Dad, those children were found but he was never found there."

"He's not dead." He denied it, soothing her gently, "Your brother is not a quitter, he must have escaped like some of the others before the police arrived." She didn't dismiss his words, only cuddled closer to her father and for the first time in years, she felt like she actually had a father that cared. Not the man who hardened after his wife died, not the man she had accused of her brother's death, but the man she remembered so long ago, being the loving father to herself and her brother who was no longer with them. It was only Lucy herself and her father now, and a lonely feeling settled in the holes of her heart where her mother and brother had once resided in.

* * *

**Chapter 14**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_._**

**_'-Than to admit that you're sad."_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**ALaViola: I got a review about someone really wanting to know what's happened to Lucy over the four years that Natsu was gone and I'm sure you're all really eager to know too but we still have a few more chapters before Natsu finds out. The surprise must come first and as a small spoiler, its related to the odd "dreams" Lucy is having as of late. Everything will come to an end. There will be a whole chapter dedicated to Natsu finding out what happened to Lucy. Do be patient for now!****  
****Thanks for reading!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: Okay, there was another review about the whole Gajeel liking Lucy thing, there will be a chapter dedicated to that so don't worry, this_ isn't_ a GaLu fic! Now just as a warning, Lissanna is the antagonist in this story so for anyone who likes Lissanna and hates for her to be the "evil" person in a story than read at your own risk. So Lucy's dad finally came into this! He's in jail, big surprise! I'm not really a fan of Jude so this was inevitable. Anyway! Thanks for the support!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


	16. Chapter 14: Better Off Being Friends

**Wow**

**I have not updated this since October.**

**Well**

**finally you get to see a bit more of Lissanna in this chapter.**

**This story is coming together, only one more surprise before**

**we can start closing all the problems and mending broken bonds.**

**Anyway,**

**Thank you for all of your reviews and support!**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_'I think that I'm afraid to be happy because-"_**

**.**

**_._**

**_._**

**_._**

**_._**

**_Chapter 14: Better Off Being Friends_**

**_~QOoOQ~_**

**_Oh, come on, come on, come on, come on!_**

**_Didn't I make you feel like you were the only man - yeah!  
An' didn't I give you nearly everything that a woman possibly can?  
Honey, you know I did!  
And each time I tell myself that I, well I think I've had enough,  
But I'm gonna show you, baby, that a woman can be tough._**

Lucy huffed in frustration. Her music wasn't turning out the way she wanted it to, the lyrics were harsh and powerful but her voice was anything but and Lucy knew she was not putting on her best performance that night by the way her band mates were giving her looks. The crowd, however, hadn't seemed to notice quite as much, still too drunk to register too much other than the other drunken people within the walls of the club. Although, it wasn't like anyone really did pay attention to the lyrics, as long as the vocals were good and the rhythm and beat matched no one gave a fuck about the artists emotions.

**_I want you to come on, come on, come on, come on and take it,  
Take it!  
Take another little piece of my heart now, baby!  
Oh, oh, break it!  
Break another little bit of my heart now, darling, yeah, yeah, yeah.  
Oh, oh, have a!  
Have another little piece of my heart now, baby,  
You know you got it if it makes you feel good,  
Oh, yes indeed._**

Lucy jumped up and down in place a few times before smacking her hand against her chest as she spit out her words. She could feel the many eyes belonging to the locals lingering on her, some a little longer than necessary-which she disregarded because really, they were in a bar and there would always be at least one person who got drunk off their ass. She could see Cana sipping on her Martini as she spoke to Erza and Jellal-to which she was happy to see that the red haired woman was doing better than what she had been-it still hadn't been long since Simon had died, maybe a month or two and although Erza was still clearly grieving from the way she would sometimes stare off into space and play with the engagement ring on the chain hanging from her neck, Lucy could see a bit of an improvement.

The first piece of proof would be her even being out here with the smallest of smiles on her face.

**_You're out on the streets looking good,  
And baby deep down in your heart I guess you know that it ain't right,  
Never, never, never, never, never, never hear me when I cry at night,  
Babe, and I cry all the time!  
But each time I tell myself that I, well I can't stand the pain,  
But when you hold me in your arms, I'll sing it once again._**

She was beginning to feel the effect of not sleeping for a long period of time. How long had it been by now? Two? Three days? Perhaps it was a little longer but despite the heaviness of her body, her mind felt light. It was an odd feeling to say the least, she had gotten used to the constant heaviness on her mind that would often clog her thoughts. She often found herself speaking with Gajeel at moments like those but despite all the recent events, she didn't feel the need to vent to her best friend and it almost scared her. She didn't feel the usual constant nag in the back of her mind that usually kept her from sleeping or the sliver of fear that was in the pit of her stomach at the thought of her dreams after falling asleep-she was just _tired._ Lucy loved the way it felt. The exhaustion without consequence or the heaviness that would lay on her chest before she went to sleep. She felt free.

**_I'll say come on, come on, come on, come on and take it!  
Take it!  
Take another little piece of my heart now, baby.  
Oh, oh, break it!  
Break another little bit of my heart now, darling, yeah,  
Oh, oh, have a!  
Have another little piece of my heart now, baby,  
You know you got it, child, if it makes you feel good._**

**_._**

**_I need you to come on, come on, come on, come on and take it,  
Take it!  
Take another little piece of my heart now, baby!  
Oh, oh, break it!  
Break another little bit of my heart, now darling, yeah, c'mon now.  
Oh, oh, have a  
Have another little piece of my heart now, baby.  
You know you got it - whoahhhhh!_**

Despite her excitement for the new, light feeling in her mind-she was afraid. Two years had gone by and she had lived with that fear ever since her brother had been taken and only just a few years ago it got worse with Natsu's departure, it felt like she was losing a part of herself. Maybe she was just misjudging it, perhaps talking with Natsu had done herself some good along with approaching her father on the topic of her brother, the guilt was there-for other men- but it made her feel just a little better to know everything that she did now. Natsu-by the looks of it- didn't seem angry at her for being so harsh with him, and just maybe she was beginning to heal, and with her brother-she knew what_ really_ happened that day. She shook her head, she could think later, for now she would just allow the music to carry her away.

**_Take it!  
Take it! Take another little piece of my heart now, baby,  
Oh, oh, break it!  
Break another little bit of my heart, now darling, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,  
Oh, oh, have a  
Have another little piece of my heart now, baby, hey,  
You know you got it, child, if it makes you feel good._**

**_..._**

"Wait, are you serious?" Lucy asked disbelief on her face as her band mates nodded. A few days had passed since she met Lissanna and spoken with her father. She had also opted for avoiding Natsu since the day they kissed, drowning herself in her music and school. It distracted her from the inevitable thoughts that would come along with the memory. "We actually got scouted for a contest?"

"Battle of the bands," Levy smiled in excitement, jumping up and down on the balls of her feet beside Gajeel. "If we win this we can go to the internationals; Grand Music Games!" She turned to Lucy, "I was thinking after we're done cleaning up here we could start working on some new songs for the competition, you know, get a head of the game?"

"I don't know about tonight Levy-Chan," Lucy yawned, "I'm kind of tired tonight and want to sleep after this."

"Oh, okay." Levy nodded, she already knew of Lucy's sleeping problems and although she was usually tired no matter what she assumed that Lucy refused to take her medicine again. "Then get some sleep tonight and we'll start tomorrow." She nodded and continued her packing, Levy following soon after only to pause when she noticed someone wasn't helping out.

"Gajeel?"

He suddenly looked at Lucy, "What happened?"

She blinked, "What?"

"Something's wrong." Gajeel accused, eyes narrowed sharply at her, "What happened?" Levy looked between the two with curious eyes. How could Gajeel notice something was wrong? Lucy barely allowed them to see when she was upset and yet he could notice such a thing just from her voice? Levy was sure she had shown no indications of stress on her face when she told them she was tired so he must have heard something in her voice that Levy hadn't.

"Gaj, nothing is wrong."

"Fuck that," he shook his head and glared at her. He paused for a moment, observing Lucy as she stood there staring at him with an indifferent expression. "…What did the idiot do now?"

"Are you talking about Natsu?" She turned to look at him and shook her head, "he didn't do anything Gajeel."

"Bullshit."

Anger flared in her and she huffed, "Nothing happened Gajeel! For Mavis sake!" Lucy snapped at him. Sure Natsu had been occupying her mind these past few nights and she had been writing worthless lyrics on to a piece of paper to get it off her mind in the middle of the night but he wasn't the only one at fault. Had she not wanted to kiss him, she would have pushed him away, fought against him, and told him how much she hated him. But she didn't. Lucy stayed silently, allowed herself to give in and move her lips against his, not allowing empty words to escape her and push him further away.

No, she wanted him to invade her privacy, to send her heart racing and mind buzzing, not allowing her think to properly. She wanted to feel his chapped lips against her skin, want him to hold her like he did all those years ago. And, Natsu did exactly that and for the first time in a while, Lucy felt lighter and free from the weight on her shoulders. She narrowed her eyes and turned away from them, grabbing a pack of smokes on the way up a set of stairs, "I'm going to go think for a bit."

It wasn't long before Gajeel came up the stairs to the roof after her, not that she expected it to be any different. He wasn't her best friend for nothing and she knew that he wouldn't just let this go without a proper explanation. "I talked to my Dad." She saw him glance at her from the side before looking down at the ground,

"Yeah? How did it go?"

"… I found out that I was really the cause of my brothers kidnapping." She didn't wait for him to reply, she didn't want the weight of her words to hang heavily on them. "Dad received a threat about my life if he did not give the group the materials they needed to perform their next attack. He gave in and they decided to attack our town and then took the children along with my brother."

"But that wasn't your fault, Bunny Girl, your Old Man could have called the cops."

"No, apparently they had tapped the line or some crap and were spying on us." She shrugged her shoulders, "I just, he's the only other family I have; he hasn't met the screwed up version of me, he only knows the sweet little girl that is his baby sister."

"And I'm sure he will love you despite you changes," Gajeel argued, "He's your brother why wouldn't he?'

"Natsu was my boyfriend; he said he loved me and yet look what happened." Her heart stuttered at her words and she could feel herself breaking down once again. "I-_oh fuck_." She slammed her fist into the railing and let out a frustrated sob.

"Why do you do this to yourself?!" Gajeel grabbed her now swollen hand and gently ran his thumb over it, his cool hands feel nice on her hand. "Why can't you just pick me?" He hesitantly caressed her head with a torn look in his dark eyes, "I could treat you so much better. I wouldn't make you cry or feel like you were worthless. I could make you _happy_."

"You don't no that," she denied with a shake of her head, "for all you know he relationship could just turn us against each other."

"I _do_ know." He insisted, "I know I can fucking make you happy- _Godamnit_ Lucy why can't you see how much I love you!?" His face twisted into a pained look as she flinched at his words. "Why? Why can't you just... let me love you?"

"I'm so sorry Gajeel," she cried out, pushing herself away from him despite the desire to comfort her best friend. The person who had stood by her the moment she had met, the person who had been there for her when Natsu had not. He is her best friend, her brother and the person who mattered most to her but she just couldn't do it. She couldn't fucking force herself to love somebody that she didn't. Especially when her heart screamed at her to be in the arms of someone else. "I just can't. I don't love you like that-'

"Do you love him?"

"What?"

"Natsu. Do you still love Natsu?"

"I-" She let out a sigh, "Yes, I'm still in love with Natsu." Now that she had said it out loud, Lucy realized she had been lying to herself for the past fucking three years. Everything from the way his smile haunted her in her sleep to the way his eyes always seemed to watch her with love and kindness, and the way he spoke to her-Mavis it was like she was all that mattered. She missed it all. His eyes still held the same emotions as they had before they were apart, however they were far more dim. She had pushed him away and said so many things. She knew he was hurt. But Mavis did she hope that the love was still there. "I just-I'm sorry Gajeel."

"Don't." He shook his head, retracting his arms from around he, "Don't apologize. I- can you give me some space?" She nodded despite him having his back to her, she needed it herself. She paused,

"There's someone already in front of you who loves you so much Gajeel, you just need to open your eyes to see it." With that she walked away and down the stairs. Everything was so fucking screwed up now. Maybe going out for some drinks wouldn't be so bad tonight. Perhaps then she could fall asleep without the guilt keeping her awake.

_**...**_

"Gajeel?" Levy called as she stepped onto the roof. Lucy had explained to her that Gajeel was in rough shape and probably wouldn't be coming down to help for awhile-not giving her much of an explanation as to why he would be so upset. Her heart thrashed in her chest as she waited for a response, it hurt thinking that Gajeel was so upset about something that he didn't want to be seen. Although, she had only ever seen him like this when it was about Lucy so she assumed that was who was causing his mood.

"Go away." He gruffly responded. Levy moved toward where she heard his voice, he didn't sound too good-his voice was lower than its usual tone and he seemed a lot harsher then how he normally is with her.

"What's wrong?" She questioned, "Lucy said you were upset."

"I'm not upset," he argued. "I just don't feel well."

She sighed for a moment before quietly sitting beside him. He looked truly pathetic, his legs were bent with his arms resting on his knees and head bowed down in between them. She cleaned her head back against the cool fence, "Okay, then what's wrong?"

"I told you I'm fine."

"You said you didn't feel well-as in you're sick, right?" When he nodded she continued, "Then, what's hurting?" He stayed silent a moment, and she had to reassure herself that he was breathing because he was so quiet, belatedly, he moved his hand to where his chest was-using his actions rather than words. Although, Levy really shouldn't be surprised, this is Gajeel. "Your chest? Is that what hurts." When he nodded she panicked, "I something wrong with you!? Do i need to get Cana to call a doctor!? Ill go get her!"

"Just shut up!" He sighed and yanked her back by the arm, when she looked back at him in confusion he released her wrist and sighed. "Can you just, sit here with me..." She nodded, her heart thudding in her chest as she sat beside him once again. As they sat there in comfortable silence, Levy took the opportunity to observe her friends state. His face seemed grim and he looked almost, pained and his eyes-Oh Mavis his eyes, the usual dark colour he held within them that always seemed to draw her into their depths seemed to push her out, trying to drown her in the looming sadness within them.

"Gajeel-"

"You know, I always thought that maybe, I should just keep quiet and wait for her to come to me but now that I have," he laughed and shook his head. "Fuck I wish I hadn't." Was he talking about Lucy? "Did you know she's still in love with that little shit who hurt her?"

"She is?" Levy blinked, "I thought she moved on."

"No, she didn't." He shook his head, "Fuck I'm such an idiot."

"No you aren't!" Levy protested, "Gajeel, what is going on!? C'mon! Just tell me what the hell is wrong?"

"You wouldn't fucking understand Levy!" He glared ferociously at her, "Just fuck off!" She glared back at him, holding back a flinch at his harsh words-he was angry and upset and she knew this, he didn't mean anything. Levy stared at him a minute, before clasping her hands together tightly in front of her.

"...Is it about Lucy?" She could feel her heart breaking when he stayed silent, she had always suspected something was going on but she prayed to Mavis that he didn't confirm her suspicions. "Gajeel? Did something happen with Lucy?"

"... I confessed to her, okay?" He sighed and covered his face with his hands, "and she rejected me, you happy now!?" Levy sat there in shock for a moment, her heart aching against her chest as its rapid pace increased. She could feel herself breaking down at his confession and fuck did it hurt like hell to know the man she loved is in love with her best friend. She could see her crush shake along with her as the tears began to come forth and he finally began to broke down and with little thought to what she was doing, Levy sought out the comfort of the crying man as she wrapped her arms around his neck. And as she cried alongside him, Levy couldn't help but fall to pieces as she consoled her love as his heart continued to break for another.

* * *

**Chapter 15**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**_._**

**_'-whenever I get too happy, something bad always happens.'_**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**ALaViola: So Lucy's band is competing in a competition, there will be a big surprise for when that chapter comes around so prepare yourselves for that time! So the song in this chapter was brilliantly recommended to us by 'Satisfied Reader' (a guest review) and it's called _piece of my heart Janis Joplin_. Thank you so much for that suggestion! I apologize for this chapter-it really sucked, and I really hate it but I promised an update and I wanted to get this out there too, I couldn't really get my point across as much as I would have liked but don't worry, it will be fixed later.  
****Thank you for reading!  
****Thanks for reading!**

**Stroke-of-Midnight87727: So somehow _ALaViola_ and I came up with this chapter when we don't really have any experience with romance-or at least I have zero. So Gajeel is having a rough time now along with Levy, being dragged in the dirt like that although "stars can't shine without darkness." Next chapter will be a little bit of Erza and what she has been going through. Well anyway! Thank you guys for reading and hope you have a nice day/night!"  
Bye!**

**Love it? Hate it? Review!**


End file.
